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Welcome back to Savvy Booked and blessed here with us today in
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this episode is Melissa DeSilva.
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Melissa is a successful physical N F T artist, entrepreneur, therapist, and
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coach who motivates other LGBTQ plus individuals and artists to make their
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life and career to the next level.
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She's the author of The Profitable Practice Helping Healing Professionals
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Build and Grow a successful.
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Melissa is also the creator and host of the SU successful lgbtq plus
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podcast, pride, connections, and Chit Chat with the queer and Creative.
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She has been featured as a guest on several international podcasts and blogs.
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You can also find her on the weekly YouTube show, the next chapter,
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where she and her co-host discuss all topics related to being single
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and getting older in our world today.
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Melissa has been a licensed social worker for 15 years and started her
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Rhode Island based mental health agency in 2015 where members of the
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LGBTQ plus community can find safe and specialized therapeutic services.
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Currently, Melissa lives and runs her mental health agency from Puerto Rico,
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while also creating art and physical NFTs that positively impact the world.
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You can find her N F T work at online N f T Gallery.
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Queer nft.io.
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. Hi Melissa.
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Hi.
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Wow, that was a mouthful.
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. That's ok.
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It's ok.
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It's good to talk about all the things that you are up to, which is fabulous.
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Thank you.
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I love talking about everything that I'm up to cause I'm always up
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to a million things, it seems yeah.
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I have tons of questions, but the first question I have
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is, what the heck are NFTs?
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I know a little bit about them, but tell us a little bit more about what they.
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So NFTs are pretty much digital tokens, but what I am doing is I am creating
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digital art out of my tangible art.
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So pieces that I have painted and created, I take them, I make them digital.
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and I sell them online.
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And then when people buy the digital piece, they also get the
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real piece so they can hang it up in the wall on their wall because
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that's what makes sense to me.
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But the great thing about NFTs is when artists sell their art, and
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it gets sold again and again.
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Artists continue to make royalties on it.
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And so that's really what is exciting for the art world, is that
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we can continue to make income on pieces that we've made and sold.
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And a lot of artists are now taking profits from their sales
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and donating them to causes that really means something to them.
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And so really, NFTs are opening a whole bunch of new doors for artists.
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And the c.
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So explain again, just how they're sold.
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Like the new owner can sell it again and make profit off of it.
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Not the new gave you profit from it, is that right?
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? Yeah.
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Yeah, because it's sold on the blockchain.
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It's a public ledger and so you can see who is purchasing
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it, who owned it at one time.
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At what at one point.
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How much it was sold for, and because it's on the public ledger, the royalties
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are in the contract to go to the original creator, so that's why it
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works out really well for artists.
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Yeah.
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How'd you get into it?
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. I got into it because I moved down to Puerto Rico almost two years
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ago, and Puerto Rico is a huge place for crypto people to come.
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. And they started talking about these NFTs, and I heard the word
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art and I was like, Ooh, I think I need to pay attention to this.
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And then I was thinking like, how can I figure out how to incorporate my.
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Into this new platform.
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And so just studying and networking and talking to the right people, I
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figured out how I can combine the two.
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Yeah.
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Interesting.
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And so with your, how does that play a little bit more into your
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like your coaching practice or your therapeutic work that you do as.
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As you could tell from my bio, I really have this passion
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for the LGBTQ plus community.
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Yeah.
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And so everything that I've started and my company, anything that I've volunteered
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for, has really had this thread of working with the lgbtq plus community.
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And so with my, our pieces that I sell, portion of the proceeds go to lgbtq plus
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communities nonprofits in Puerto Rico.
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And where it that common thread throughout my life continues to run.
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Sure.
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Yeah.
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Absolutely.
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So what had you start your practice really, was it back in, in 2015?
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, is that right?
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Yes.
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So I was actually a school social worker.
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That's what I wanted to be when I grow up.
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I had this amazing school social worker and made a big difference in my life
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and I was like, I wanna be Tracy when I grow up . And so I went to school,
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I did my internship under Tracy.
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I.
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Graduated and I got this job as a school social worker in a performing
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art school, which was amazing cause I love singing and dancing with everybody.
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And then after about six years I was like, I don't think I really like this.
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Which was a shock, right?
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Yeah.
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Cause you like worked so hard all your life to be what you wanna be
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when you grow up and then to realize nah, I, my passion for this is like
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shorter than the student loans.
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I'm still repaying
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During that time, I had a student that was transitioning from female to male, and
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we were trying to find support community for that client and that student, and
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we really couldn't find any at the time.
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And so when I decided that I wanted to go out and start my own private
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practice, that's where I really wanted to focus my attention on was
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helping the transgender community.
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But we also wanted to make sure that our agency.
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Open to the LGBTQ plus community.
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So it was a safe place for all individuals under that, an umbrella.
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And so that's where it started with the mental health agency and right now
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I have 22 clinicians working under me.
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And even if you don't identify as LGBTQ or queer just knowing
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that there are therapists there that are open-minded people are
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attracted to coming to the agency.
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Yeah.
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. Yeah.
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That's amazing.
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So just even growing your agency and bringing people underneath
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you as a business owner, like how did that transition come to be?
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I actually found that I really love the business side of things.
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Yeah.
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I like the movement and the shaken of figuring out how to solve this problem
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and that problem, and then realizing.
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You can make money as a business owner.
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So in school they teach you like you're not gonna make any money as a therapist.
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But I refuse to believe that.
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And so I figured out, okay, so if I do it this way and create this type of
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system, I can actually make money where I can survive and live on an island
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that I've always wanted to live on.
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Yeah.
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And.
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Realizing like first I didn't wanna be a school social worker.
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That was difficult for me to come to grips with, but then to realize like
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I prefer the business side more than the therapy side, that was a little
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bit jarring for me too, and just being brave enough to be willing to.
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Pivot in my life and my career and then realizing like I don't wanna live in
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the northeast forever and to move to the island sure is a big pivot I had to take.
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But yeah, I really enjoyed the business side of things and finding mentors
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that could teach me how to do it.
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All the stuff they didn't teach you in grad school, and
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that's why I created the book.
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And and I continue to coach people on how they can build profitable
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practices on their own as well.
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Very cool.
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Yeah.
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Tell us a little bit more about, about your book.
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So the book came out of everything that I did wrong.
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Teaching people how to do it a different way ? Sure.
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So I always I feel like I failed forward.
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It was just just keep picking yourself up and keep moving.
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And I wanted to create a resource for other therapists where they
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wouldn't have to keep failing forward.
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They could read this book, they can get these kits before having
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to have that experience themselves.
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Yeah.
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And so now you can purchase that book in Kindle or paperback on Amazon, and
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I get people probably like once every other month saying thank you for,
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supplying this information for us.
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It's very helpful.
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Yeah.
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What's a chapter, if you don't mind sharing a little bit more,
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like what's a nugget from.
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Book or something that you went through that you were like, if I would've
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known , I would've done it differently.
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Oh, if I would've known how difficult insurance companies
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are to deal with as a provider.
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Insurance companies.
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Yeah.
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Dealing with insurance companies, it is like a nightmare.
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Just as a provider.
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It's a system that is really.
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For everybody involved in it.
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They don't wanna pay providers.
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They wanna take the money from clients.
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And and the prices that they charge and they treat therapists
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different than doctors.
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Like sometimes when you go to the doctor's office and say, the is
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$200 and insurance covers 160, you get a bill for the $40, right?
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, they don't do that for the.
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, it's we will pay you $40 and that's all you get.
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You can't charge the client the extra.
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It's just against the agreement.
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We're not supposed to talk to other therapists about what they get paid
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because not everybody gets paid the same.
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Insurance companies will say no.
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There's too many therapists in the area that take our insurance,
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so we are not gonna panel.
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Which isn't true because we have people calling up saying I can't find
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a therapist that takes this insurance.
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So the person, the insurance companies will always win in the end.
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That's something that I learned.
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Did not know how insurance work.
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Most people don't know how insurance companies work.
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I would say that would be the thing that.
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probably go back and reevaluate.
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Interesting.
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Wow.
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That's bananas.
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Also, sometimes it's hard to work in a system that you know
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is flawed and have no, no power.
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Sometimes No power.
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Yeah, no power.
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Sometimes they will just deny claims just because there's no reason.
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Yeah.
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They're just.
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Now we're not gonna pay this, right?
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And so I had to hire somebody full-time to pretty much chase down insurance claims
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because I think they think if they keep denying, forget it about eventually.
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and we won't have to worry about getting that money.
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So it's constant, this constant having to keep updated records and I know that
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clients get frustrated with it and it's we're just as frustrated too because
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they're not working with us either.
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Or clients get upset because, we don't take that insurance.
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It could be the insurance doesn't wanna panel us for whatever reason, or the
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insurance companies don't pay Sure.
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Or don't pay well at all.
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Insurance.
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And we had to figure out how we're gonna live and how I can pay my staff.
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So it's a awful system.
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And that's why you'll find a lot of providers not taking insurance anymore.
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Yeah.
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My, my therapist doesn't take insurance, but it's also, yeah.
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It's super interesting to hear the backend because it totally makes sense.
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It's like either, Charge what you need to survive or Uhhuh deal with the insurance
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companies where the, they should be paying out more the same amount, roughly.
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Yeah.
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What you would take out of pocket.
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Exactly.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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And they don't, and and you can't really fight that because it's
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like this huge monster of a system that they're not gonna win against.
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Yeah.
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So what is something that you teach?
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Besides calling out.
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The hot mess express of what that is.
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what do you share in your book to combat that?
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Or is it more of just like a warning?
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? I give a warning.
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I'm like, here's the warning.
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. Yeah.
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These are the pros and cons.
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Yes, your caseload will fill up really fast, but.
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You might not get paid for all those cases, or you'll have to chase down that
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money, or you can do out-of-pocket, but then that limits the number of clients
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that are gonna be reaching out to you.
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Sure.
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The population that might be able to afford you so there's differences,
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the pros and cons in both of those.
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And then there's like the in between.
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So some people will say I'll take state insurance, but I only have this many.
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And otherwise, this is available for out-of-pocket.
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Yeah.
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So some people figure out, what works for them.
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Sure.
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How have you seen, the therapy.
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Space, change in the last five, 10 years.
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Even.
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Even it being more accessible online or more opportunities for y for the
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therapist and the patient or client, whatever be the best phrase for that.
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What is something that you've seen happen in the last five years
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that has been in 2015, I wanted.
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Business to be all online.
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I was like, I'm not getting an office space.
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That's just ridiculous.
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I can do it online.
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But at that time, insurance companies were like, no, we will
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not reimburse for online sessions.
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Oh, we don't think it's ethical.
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It's, it's not the right way to do treatment.
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And lo and behold, here comes covid and now it's good to go.
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And this is after I've rented 13 office spaces.
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Yeah.
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To get therapists their room.
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And now I haven't seen some of my therapists for over two years because,
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, they're just working from home.
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So that's really shifted this whole like virtual online
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mental health type of therapy.
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Is something, even in grad school I was talking about it.
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I'm like, why are we not offering this online and Right.
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One of the biggest ethical gurus out there.
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He will scare you, tell you're gonna go to jail every time
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you take one of his courses.
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And he was like, no, nope, not You.
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It's not the same.
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You can't really get that energy, you know the feedback.
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and now it's completely different.
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Whole businesses that created international, online, yeah.
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Providing mental health.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I can't tell you like how, even just with my therapist going from in-person to, we
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actually went online, I think even before.
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Or it was an option a little bit before Covid and now she Same is just yeah, no,
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like I mostly just do online now because it's just even more cost effective.
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It's easier.
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I think it also just helps people.
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She love her, but she's about 45 minutes for me.
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So it's like our hour appointment plus 45 minutes before an app.
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Yes.
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Come home.
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And so this and gasoline prices too, right?
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Yeah.
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And if you're hesitant to find a therapist for all of the reasons that we have
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to want to do therapy, even just the inconvenience of it becomes, becomes
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one, and so having it all online, that's so interesting that, it was more of
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a, it's not ethical to do it online.
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Was more the thought there.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Huh?
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Yep.
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It's so interesting how the thought has changed and now I'm like, oh, I have all
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those office spaces until May of 2023.
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So what happens May 23 , I'm spending almost a hundred thousand
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a year and just rent alone.
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Getting spaces.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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Oh, wow.
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I think that's something that's huge.
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That's just happening in general.
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Everyone went.
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00:15:38
, even before I started my business.
Devonee:
00:15:40
Around that time, it was interesting to see of we were already at like half
Devonee:
00:15:44
and half online and in person, but it was interesting to see all of a sudden
Devonee:
00:15:47
it was, no, no working from home.
Devonee:
00:15:49
And then it was like, oh, okay now all of a sudden . Yep.
Devonee:
00:15:53
. Yes.
Devonee:
00:15:54
Interesting to see that shift.
Devonee:
00:15:56
For sure.
Devonee:
00:15:56
In general.
Devonee:
00:15:58
Yeah, which makes sense.
Devonee:
00:15:59
But I'm enjoying it.
Devonee:
00:16:00
The online world has allowed me to do so much more in my career
Devonee:
00:16:04
and it in my move to Puerto Rico.
Devonee:
00:16:07
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:16:08
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:16:08
What was that?
Devonee:
00:16:10
Tell us a little bit more about that move.
Devonee:
00:16:12
Was that something you've been thinking about doing for a long time?
Devonee:
00:16:14
Was it things happened and then it was like, all right, let's do it.
Devonee:
00:16:16
What was the process for.
Devonee:
00:16:18
I had always wanted to move out of the northeast because
Devonee:
00:16:21
I don't like cold weather.
Devonee:
00:16:23
Sure.
Devonee:
00:16:23
I just never have.
Devonee:
00:16:24
I feel like I'm trapped.
Devonee:
00:16:26
My fingers hurt nine months out of the year.
Devonee:
00:16:28
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:16:28
. And so I told my ex-husband, my husband at the time I don't wanna
Devonee:
00:16:33
live here forever I wanted to explore.
Devonee:
00:16:35
We watch International House hunters and I get these big ideas in my head.
Devonee:
00:16:40
and I was like thinking about Costa Rica or Honduras.
Devonee:
00:16:44
And I kept on putting it out there.
Devonee:
00:16:46
I mentioned Puerto Rico.
Devonee:
00:16:49
We came down here, stayed a little bit, but even though he knew this was a
Devonee:
00:16:54
dream of mine, I think he was thinking more of like when we retire and I.
Devonee:
00:16:59
I'm not gonna wait another 20 something years to retire and then move down.
Devonee:
00:17:03
But then covid hit and like a lot of people, things changed.
Devonee:
00:17:07
You come to realize a lot of things and we decided that we were just
Devonee:
00:17:12
going to consciously uncouple.
Devonee:
00:17:14
I decided that I did not want to be married anymore.
Devonee:
00:17:17
It ran its course.
Devonee:
00:17:19
We were together for 14 years.
Devonee:
00:17:20
Yeah, we still care about each other.
Devonee:
00:17:23
We were not meant to be together forever.
Devonee:
00:17:25
Sure.
Devonee:
00:17:25
We just don't have much in common anymore.
Devonee:
00:17:27
And so that was the opportunity I took.
Devonee:
00:17:29
I said now that we're not together, I'm gonna move to Puerto Rico.
Devonee:
00:17:33
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:17:33
And so I was like, I'll go check it out for five weeks.
Devonee:
00:17:37
And I came down for five weeks and then I signed a six month lease.
Devonee:
00:17:41
And from there I was like I'll just continue to stay here.
Devonee:
00:17:45
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:17:46
And moving your business out there was that.
Devonee:
00:17:50
A headache or was it not bad?
Devonee:
00:17:52
I have a really great staff and I even brought my staff down here
Devonee:
00:17:56
at one time too, and I was like, this is what I'm manifesting.
Devonee:
00:18:00
Just so you know, yeah, we had an office space that was like my
Devonee:
00:18:03
Puerto Rico manifestation dream
Devonee:
00:18:05
And so when I said Hey, I'm going to Puerto Rico, there was no surprise.
Devonee:
00:18:09
Sure.
Devonee:
00:18:09
And and then my assistant ended up moving to North Carolina.
Devonee:
00:18:13
So we still have one person still in Rhode Island.
Devonee:
00:18:16
But yeah, they weren't surprised.
Devonee:
00:18:17
We've been able to adjust to this online world and it's
Devonee:
00:18:22
been working out really well.
Devonee:
00:18:24
Yeah, amazing.
Devonee:
00:18:26
And it's so great when you are able to just like manifest, decide and then take
Devonee:
00:18:32
the action and just see like that whole circle come to be, and you're like, I did.
Devonee:
00:18:37
Exactly.
Devonee:
00:18:38
Somebody wanna too easy or anything, but I did that and yeah, to live.
Devonee:
00:18:42
And it's interesting because like I was walking, I recently moved to the city.
Devonee:
00:18:46
I was in a different location for the first part.
Devonee:
00:18:49
and I'm walking around the city yesterday and I'm like, I was here
Devonee:
00:18:53
with my ex-husband like five years ago.
Devonee:
00:18:55
Yeah.
Devonee:
00:18:55
And to realize like I would be here five years later as my home, it's just really
Devonee:
00:19:01
interesting to reflect back on the journey that has come over the past few years.
Devonee:
00:19:06
Amazing.
Devonee:
00:19:07
I love to hear it.
Devonee:
00:19:08
Melissa, if anyone wants to find you or find any more
Devonee:
00:19:11
information, where can they find.
Devonee:
00:19:13
, you can find me@melissadisilva.com.
Devonee:
00:19:16
Awesome.
Devonee:
00:19:16
Perfect.
Devonee:
00:19:17
And is there anything else that you would like to plug?
Devonee:
00:19:21
Anything else that we can find or purchase?
Devonee:
00:19:23
Any NFTs?
Devonee:
00:19:24
I know we have queer nft io.
Devonee:
00:19:26
Yes, and you can find all my R on melissa disilva.com and we'll
Devonee:
00:19:30
bring you right over there.
Devonee:
00:19:31
Perfect.
Devonee:
00:19:32
Thank you so much.
Devonee:
00:19:32
It was so great having you on the show.
Devonee:
00:19:34
Thank you.
Devonee:
00:19:35
Thank you.
Devonee:
00:19:36
Thanks for everyone listening.