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Stop Running Your Home on Willpower: 3 Signs Your Household Was Built to Be Managed, Not to Form Saints
2nd April 2026 • The Catholic Man Show • The Catholic Man Show
00:00:00 01:09:22

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Most Catholic dads are working hard in their home. The problem? They’re not working on it. There’s a difference between a household that runs because you’re there holding it together — and one that’s been designed to form your wife and children for heaven even when you’re not in the room.

In this episode, Dave and Adam get into John Cuddeback’s framework for the domestic church, pull from their book Living Beyond Sunday, and share the 3 telltale signs your home is running on willpower instead of design. Plus: what to do about it, how morning chaos is actually a design problem, and why the living room might be the most important room in your house.

In This Episode

  • Why Holy Week is the lens through which this entire conversation happens
  • The Deacon’s homily: “You are a thought of God made flesh” — and what that means at your most broken moments
  • Adam’s son Luke wins concert tickets — then realizes it’s Good Friday. What happened next.
  • Adam announces M6 Marketing and The Grounded Builder Substack
  • The body-soul composite of the home: daily life vs. moral and spiritual formation
  • Working IN your family vs. working ON your family (the entrepreneur analogy every dad needs)
  • 3 signs your home runs on willpower, not design:
  • The same corrections keep happening to the same kids — it’s not a motivation problem, it’s a design problem
  • Morning chaos — nothing was built right the night before to make it smooth
  • Your presence is the only thing holding it together — when you’re gone, the wheels fall off
  • 3 diagnostic questions to ask when something keeps breaking in your home
  • The Great Silence: Dave’s family morning prayer rule (and why it’s formed him more than his kids)
  • Why bells beat yelling — and the sacramental case for ringing a blessed bell in your home
  • Giving kids real work with real consequences: why sweeping the floor doesn’t cut it
  • The dinner table as non-negotiable — and why screens are the enemy of family formation
  • The one room in your house not ordered toward a biological need — and why it matters most
  • Why designing the household is a man’s domain and responsibility — ordered entirely in love

Timestamps

  • 00:00 — The manliness warning. Yes, they played it twice.
  • 01:30 — Blessed Holy Week + Deacon’s homily: “You are a thought of God”
  • 07:00 — Luke wins concert tickets. It’s Good Friday. What he said.
  • 09:30 — Mary’s procedure + prayer request
  • 11:00 — Adam announces M6 Marketing + The Grounded Builder Substack
  • 15:30 — White Lightning: the 1989 Chevy, the gas station, and the woman whose dad owned it
  • 22:00 — The topic: designing your home as the domestic church
  • 25:00 — Cuddeback’s 4 things a home must do + the body-soul composite of household life
  • 30:00 — Working IN the family vs. ON the family (business owner analogy)
  • 34:00 — The 3 signs your home runs on willpower, not design
  • 40:00 — The 3 diagnostic questions when something keeps breaking
  • 45:00 — Rules for the day, the Great Silence, and preparing kids to hear God’s voice
  • 53:00 — The case for blessed bells (and why yelling kills the spirit of what you’re doing)
  • 58:00 — Giving kids real work with real consequences
  • 1:02:00 — The dinner table: the most attacked and most essential daily ritual
  • 1:07:00 — The living room: the only room not ordered toward a biological need
  • 1:12:00 — Why this is a man’s job — and what authority granted in love looks like

Resources Mentioned

  • The American Catholic Land Movement — edited by Jason Craig and Jared Stout (TAN Books)
  • Living Beyond Sunday: Making Your Home a Holy Place — by Dave Niles and Adam Minihan
  • John Cuddeback, Ph.D. — philosopher, professor, and homesteader. Find him at LifeCraft.org
  • The Grounded Builder — Adam’s Substack on virtue, business, fatherhood, and homesteading. Published every Thursday.
  • Select International Tours — selectinternationaltours.com — The Catholic pilgrimage company Dave and Adam trust.
  • Divine Mercy Chaplet — pray it daily at 3:00 PM, the Hour of Mercy
  • The Great Silence — a monastic morning practice you can adapt for your home. Start with Psalm 51.

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Catholic Answers – Friendship and Fatherhood
01:39:27
Building virtue with manners
00:47:58
Obedience
00:47:57
Ideas for Catholic Dads
00:44:04
Virtue of Hope with Fr. Philip Bochanski
00:43:30
The Purposeful Domicile with Dr. John Cuddeback
00:47:57
The Role of the Saints in the Renewal of the Church
00:44:03
True Friendship with Dr. John Cuddeback
00:43:56
Principle of the Integral Good
00:47:59
The 7 Liberal Arts with Andrew Pudewa
00:47:57
Walking with your wife through RCIA
00:43:30
Sexual Ethics with Karlo Broussard
00:47:57
Cigar 101 with Ultimo Cigars
01:30:15
Auxilium Christianorum
00:47:57
Tim Staples on Mary our Mother
00:47:57
The Catholic Gentleman
00:47:57
The Gifts of the Holy Spirit during Holy Mass
00:47:58
Home Altars and Living the Virtuous Life
00:47:57
Understanding Suffering with Patrick Coffin
00:47:57
What is Backbiting?
00:49:30
Spiritual Exercises from St. Ignatius
00:47:57
Unplanned: Interview with Doug Johnson
00:47:03
154. 8 Daughters of Lust
00:47:57
153. Trent Horn on Relativism
00:47:57
152. Baby Carriers and Natural Family Planning
00:47:57
151. Grill Guns and Incorruptible Saints
00:47:57
Catholic Culture with Fr. Jonathan Meyer
00:43:30
Dr. Ray on Disciplining Children – Episode 149
00:47:57
Change of Plans: Casual Convo on Holiness – Episode 148
00:47:08
Talking Discipline with 6-time World and Olympic Champion, John Smith – Episode 147
00:26:06
Complete My Joy: Bishop Thomas Olmsted
00:24:15
Identifying our root sins – Episode 146
00:47:27
CourageRC with Fr. Philip Bochanski – Episode 145
00:47:57
Hot Sauce and Movies – Episode 144
00:47:57
5 Philosophers Catholic Men Should Know – Episode 143
00:47:57
The Eucharist – Episode 142
00:47:57
Peace with Broken Arrow Brewing Co – Episode 141
00:45:02
Endurance and Aggression – Episode 140
00:47:57
Drinking with the Saints – Episode 139
00:47:32
What do we know about angels? Episode 138
01:19:13
Dr. Taylor Marshall discusses Socialism – Episode 137
01:10:33
Benedictine Beer and Relics – Episode 136
00:47:57
The Liturgy Guys – Episode 135
00:58:34
The Virtue of Magnificence – Episode 134
00:47:57
Karlo Broussard talks philosophy – Episode 133
00:47:57
Council of Man: Extended Conversation with Karlo Broussard on Philosophy
00:22:16
Benedictine Monks at Clear Creek Monastery – Episode 132
00:47:57
Word on Fire – Episode 131
00:56:49
A Servant Leader – Episode 130
00:47:55
The Art of Manliness with Brett McKay
00:51:57
Literature and Moral Imagination – Episode 129
00:47:57
Magnanimous men strive for the highest glory – Episode 128
00:47:57
Chris Stefanick: Extra Content for CoM
00:07:45
Special Edition with Chris Stefanick
00:15:08
Spotted Cow, Catholic Woodworker, and Ember Days – Episode 127
00:47:57
Marriage and the Eucharist with John Martignoni – Episode 126
00:47:57
The Seminary with Fr. Michael Pratt – Episode 125
00:47:57
Relationship with Jesus – Episode 124
00:47:57
Dignity of Fatherhood – Episode 123
00:48:07
The Domestic Church (3 of 3): Dr. Scott and Kimberly Hahn
00:15:14
The Domestic Church (2 of 3): Hector Molina
00:13:36
The Domestic Church (1 of 3): Sam Guzman
00:12:29
Sam Guzman on the Domestic Church
00:12:29
Distraction in Prayer (and the episode) – Episode 122
00:47:57
Power of Silence – Episode 121
00:47:57
Sanctifying your drive – Episode 120
00:47:57
Why Catholics are not Fundamentalists – Episode 119
00:47:57
Michael Knowles: Soccer, whiskey, liturgy, and reverence – Episode 118
00:47:57
Council of Man: Idea of a Village with Sam Guzman
00:10:35
Council of Man Extra Content: Interview with Sean Fitzpatrick
00:10:43
Special Edition – Karlo Broussard in stud-io
00:58:46
Where’d all this stuff come from? – Episode 117
00:47:58
First Dance with Mary Jane – Episode 116
00:47:57
Council of Man Interview with 6 time world and olympic champion – John Smith
00:27:06
Redneck Riviera, Noodlin, a Church Key, and Matt Nelson – Episode 115
00:45:00
Hospitality at Church with Fr. Brian O’Brien – Episode 114
00:45:00
Anger with Patrick Coffin – Episode 113
00:43:30
Casual Convo – Episode 112
00:45:02
Talking Virtue at Holy Family Cathedral – Episode 111
00:45:00
Karlo uses a shovel to Prepare the Way – Episode 110
00:43:31
Returning to a poetical culture – Episode 109
00:45:05
The Feast of the Ascension – Episode 108
00:45:00
Discipleship – Episode 107
00:45:00
Prudence goes Potty – Episode 106
00:45:00
Special Edition: Hoffman Blacksmithing – Episode 105
00:37:42
Continue Living the Easter Season with Fr. Bryan Ketterer – Episode 103
00:45:00
TOB Part 2 of 2 with Fr. Christopher Pietraszko – Episode 102
00:45:00
Interview with ArchBishop Charles Chaput
00:13:35
CoM: Lessons from a Prodigal Son – Sam Guzman
01:07:26
TOB Part 1 of 2 with Fr. Christopher Pietraszko – Episode 101
00:45:00
Episode 100
00:45:00
One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic – Episode 99
00:45:00
Made in God’s image with Fr. Daniel Grover – Episode 98
00:45:00
CoM Episode – Talking with Patrick Coffin
00:27:28
Tattoos with Fr. Sean O’Brien – Episode 97
00:45:00
Catholic Liturgy – Episode 96
00:45:00
Interview with Steve Pokorny – Council of Man Interview
00:44:12
We didn’t want another Lenten podcast
00:45:00
Interview with Bishop Olmsted – Council of Man
00:20:51
Into the Breach – Episode 94
00:45:00
Living Sunday Well – Episode 93
00:52:07
The Catholic Church and the Death Penalty
00:58:52
Growing in Faith with your Wife – Episode 92
00:45:00
Sports Talk with Fr. John Hollowell – Episode 91
00:45:00
Man Caves, Traditions, and Conferences with Patrick Coffin – Episode 90
00:49:30
Reflection on St. Joseph – Episode 89
00:49:30
The Vocation of Kingship – Episode 88
00:49:30
The World Needs Mary – Episode 87
00:49:30
Pilgrimage with Fr. Sean Donovan – Episode 86
00:49:30
WhiskyCast: Whisky 101 with Mark Gillespie – Special Edition Episode 85
00:49:20
Patiently waiting at the Beef Jerky Outlet – Episode 84
00:49:22
Is the liturgical year informing your life? – Episode 83
00:49:30
Are we really courageous? – Episode 82
00:49:30
Catholic History with Steve Weidenkopf – Episode 81
00:49:30
Importance of friends – Episode 80
00:49:30
Curiosity a Vice? – Episode 79
00:49:30
Order in the Clear Creek Abbey – Episode 78
00:49:30
Natural and Supernatural Virtue – Episode 77
00:49:30
Be specific – Episode 76
00:49:30
Mortification – Episode 75
00:49:30
Tomics and Initiative – Episode 74
00:49:30
Laphroaig and Honor – Episode 73
00:49:30
Faith, Family, and Work with Mario Lopez – Episode 72
00:49:30
Talking Porn with Matt Fradd – Episode 71
00:49:30
Doug on Tap – Episode 70
00:49:30
Evangelizing the youths with Taylor Schroll – Episode 69
00:49:30
Transitions with the Crunch – Episode 68
00:49:30
Trent Horn, debating, and the Catechism
00:49:30
Adam interviews Raymond Arroyo at the Wichita Family Conference
00:15:22
Talking to Protestants with Steve Ray – Episode 66
00:49:30
Bad words, curse words, and flamethrowers – Episode 65
00:49:30
Role of a Father in Education with Fr. Brian O’Brien – Episode 64
00:49:30
CoM – St. John Vianney with Fr. Brian O’Brien
00:38:07
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread – Episode 63
00:49:30
CoM Episode: World Religion, Philosophy, and Seminary with Peter Puleo
00:53:08
Round 2 – Episode 62
00:49:30
Compassion – Episode 61
00:49:30
Voice of OSU Cowboys – Faith and Sports: Episode 60
00:49:30
CoM Exclusive with Sam Guzman on The Latin Mass
00:22:33
CoM Exclusive – Interview with Matthew Arnold from the Oklahoma Catholic Men’s Conference
00:14:31
CoM Exclusive – Bear Woznick with Adam and David at the Men’s Conference
00:20:13
Bear Woznick: Long Ride Home – Episode 59
00:49:30
Father/Son Relationship – Episode 58
00:49:30
Fireside Chat with Michael Miley – Episode 57
00:49:30
CoM – Fireside with Michael Miley from Rival Sons
00:45:25
Just War Theory – Episode 56
00:49:30
Adam and David join Patrick on ‘The Patrick Coffin Show’
00:42:43
Bachelor Party: Catholic Men’s Guide – Episode 55
00:49:30
Exclusive Content Council of Man – Gus Lloyd with Adam and David Full Interview
00:10:32
Rants and Fatima – Episode 54
00:49:30
G.K. Chesterton and Msgr. Patrick Gaalaas – Episode 53
00:50:15
Bishop-Elect Daniel Mueggenborg and Men’s Spirituality – Episode 52
00:50:15
India Whisky, Regina Cigars, and Divine Mercy – Episode 51
00:50:15
Priesthood and Washing of the Feet – Episode 50
00:50:15
TCMS 1 year – Episode 49
00:50:15
Jesus And The Jewish Roots Of The Eucharist
00:47:23
How to Keep Your Kids Catholic
00:56:48
Matthew James Christoff – The New Emangelization
01:00:24
The Catholic Man Show – Sacred Art Series Interview
00:32:38
Interview with Darin DeLozier
00:55:38
Adam and Miley’s Unscripted Convo for CoM
00:54:47
Talking about Virtue in Bartlesville – Episode 48
00:49:12
Dating as a Catholic – Episode 47
00:49:12
Bible and Family – Mark Hart Episode 46
00:49:12
Bible and Family – Mark Hart Episode 46
00:49:12
Ephesians 5 with Joe Heschmeyer – Episode 45
00:49:12
Justice with the Tulsa DA – The Catholic Man Show
00:49:13
Praise your wife in public with Patrick Coffin – Episode 43
00:49:13
Sam Guzman, The Catholic Gentleman, Little Kids in Mass
00:49:12
Bon Temps Toul Temps with Karlo Broussard from Catholic Answers
00:49:12
Beauty – Episode 40
00:49:12
Knock Knock. Who’s there? Jehovah Witnesses! – Episode 39
00:49:12
Leisure – Episode 38
00:49:12
The Catholic Gentleman – Episode 37
00:49:12
The Catholic Gentleman – Episode 37
00:49:12
Simple. – Episode 36
00:49:12
Let’s talk about indulgences
00:49:12
Let’s talk about indulgences – Episode 35
00:49:12
Special Edition – Matthew James Christoff, The New eMANgelization
01:00:38
Fighting Out of a Spiritual Rut – Episode 34
00:47:46
The Immaculate Conception
00:47:46
The Immaculate Conception – Episode 32
00:47:46
The Grateful Guy – Episode 31
00:46:49
How’s your prayer life? – Episode 30
00:47:46
Benefits of Frequent Confessions: Episode 29
00:47:46
Volume Level: 11 – Episode 28
00:47:46
That Was Fallacious! – Episode 27
00:46:30
His 5 Loves – Episode 26
00:46:30
The Duties of Men – Episode 25
00:49:30
TCMS Goes Camping – Episode 24
00:46:30
Men… Stop Doing This – Episode 23
00:46:30
Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist – Episode 22
00:46:30
Patrick Coffin joins The Catholic Man Show – Episode 21
00:46:30
40 Days for Life – Episode 20
00:46:30
Dangers of the Internet – Episode 19
00:46:30
Special Edition – Champions of the Rosary
00:47:05
Be A Hopeful Man – Episode 18
00:46:30
2 Manly Men – Episode 17
00:47:39
Being a Gentleman: from your head to your toes – Episode 16
00:46:30
The Diaconate – Episode 15
00:43:30
Catholic Voting – Episode 14
00:51:00
Perseverance – Episode 13
00:51:00
Apostolic Succession – Episode 12
00:51:03
Brotherhood – Episode 11
00:51:00
Fourth Cup – Episode 10
00:51:00
Localism – Episode 9
00:51:00
Redemptive Suffering – Episode 8
00:51:00
NFP – Episode 7
00:51:00
Answering Atheism – Episode 6
00:51:00
The Mass in the Bible – Episode 5
00:50:54
Apologetics 101 – Episode 4
00:47:46
The Roles of Fatherhood – Episode 3
00:47:46
Respect for Life! – Episode 2
00:47:46
The Ridiculously Miraculous – Episode 1
00:14:57