What if changing thought habits could completely transform your life and leadership? In this episode, Jeanne Willson and Amy Kemp explore how changing thought habits is the key to overcoming burnout and unlocking your full potential. Learn how to break negative thinking patterns, build self-awareness, and create mindset shifts that lead to greater impact and influence without burnout.

Amy shares powerful strategies in mindset coaching for leaders and high-achieving women, offering insights into developing healthy thought habits that support resilience, personal growth, and leadership mindset transformation.

This episode of Blueprints for Brilliance: Coaching Insights delivers actionable coaching insights for personal transformation and six figure business coaching strategies designed to empower ambitious women to think differently, lead confidently, and thrive in business and life.

Helpful Links:

Amy Kemp Website

The Habit Finder Assessment

The Marketing VA Advantage 

Six Figure Business Coaching 

Mastering Online Marketing for Entrepreneurs

Double Your Income with a Marketing VA, even on a tight budget

Welcome to Blueprints for Brilliance Coaching Insights, a

podcast by coaches for coaches.

Our guests share their hard one wisdom to help you grow your coaching

business and create a life of success.

So get ready to unlock the blueprints to your success.

Welcome everyone to today's episode.

I'm thrilled to have you here, and I'm also thrilled to have

Amy Kemp from Amy Kemp Inc.

She is a coach.

She coaches people on how to change their thought habits, so I'm

excited to learn more about that.

So welcome to the show, Amy.

It's lovely to have you.

I can't wait.

Very excited.

Good stuff.

So let's start with your journey, your story.

Like how did you become a coach who helps people change their thought habits?

Ugh, totally by accident.

Don't you find the best places you land?

Sometimes you get there and think, how did I get here?

It's so wild.

Pretty quick version.

My very first professional foray was as a high school English

teacher, which I loved and coach.

Uh, I thought that I was going to teach in college.

I really loved the words in the books and all of those things.

Um, that being said, I also found that I really enjoy people.

And that I have a knack for growing businesses, and so wound up working

in sales and then grew a business over 20 years in sales leadership

where I was developing people who were selling products and.

Through that work, I worked with a coach who used an assessment

tool called The Habit Finder.

It is a very unique, not very well known tool that measures your subconscious

habits of thinking, meaning your risk of falling into certain patterns of thinking.

The work I did with this coach was transformational and really

tripled the size of my business.

And then this coach worked with a lot of people within my organization, and

so we had a really close relationship.

Kind of fast forward.

And in my personal life, I found myself about nine years ago having many

conversations with women who were very successful in their lives and careers

who were experiencing the same things.

Isolation, exhaustion, overwhelm, overworking, hyper functioning,

just all of these same pattern.

I kept thinking if I could get these women together, something

really cool could happen.

That if they knew one another, you know, they could, there could

be something really meaningful.

I was in Salt Lake City speaking an event I knew, or I always had stayed in touch

with this coach that I had worked with.

So we met for dinner while I was out there just to catch up.

I told him I'm having all these conversations and he said, well,

we're starting training for people to use the Habit Finder on Monday.

This was a Thursday.

And I was, I mean, when I tell you like, I had never thought of it.

It wasn't, I wasn't like planning to do that, but I thought, oh,

it was so out there and so yet it made perfect sense to me.

And so I, I went through the extensive certification and thought I'd just do a

couple groups on the side, and it's grown into a business over the last nine years.

Can you tell us a little bit about the Habit Finder tool?

Yeah.

It's very different from a lot of assessment tools that

are exceptionally valuable.

It's just different.

So you have to kind of keep it in its own bucket.

What it's measuring, when you look at the measurements, and you can take it for free

on my website, it's not a tool you have to pay to take, which is kind of a benefit.

So the tool measures risk of your brain following certain patterns of thinking.

So imagine like the children's game shoots and ladders.

You land on the square, you're gonna go down the slide.

Our brains kind of function that way too.

You know, something happens that triggers a a, a survival response

in, in our subconscious mind.

We're gonna go down that path of thinking because that path is what has allowed

us to survive for our entire lives.

And so I'll give you an example of a conversation I had this week with,

with a potential client who essentially raised herself we'll, say, right?

Just grew up in a home where, you know, she was living

independently at a very young age.

She had to take care of things that she was way too young to be taken care of.

Um, really just was her survival instinct was to be hyper productive.

Very competent.

Never show weakness, no time for feeling.

You just work hard.

You get the thing done right?

Well, it's served her really well.

She ends up being a leader everywhere she works.

The problem is when those are your survival mechanisms, you response to

anything is, I'm gonna work harder, I'm gonna perform, I'm gonna be perfect.

I'm gonna, and she's completely exhausted.

And burned out because when you employ a survival mechanism

past the point of needing it, it becomes detrimental and damaging.

But all of this is happening at a subconscious level.

She's not thinking, oh, this is how I survive, so I'm going to do this.

It's just happening.

So that's, yeah, that's why she doesn't have any time for that.

She's so worried and, and you know, so climbing that ladder that she doesn't

have time to think and look big picture.

And it works really well in a lot of like corporate America,

in a lot of business settings.

You get great outcomes for a time, but you get to a certain point where you may

want more impact, income or influence, but you don't have any more to give.

There's no more time, you don't have any more energy you can't give anymore.

And then what?

Or you come to the point where your body starts breaking down, or at least giving

you red flags that it's breaking down.

Or you just can no longer muster up the energy you once had.

You know, maybe you're getting a little bit older or maybe you're

in a different season where you now have kids also, where the, and then

you go home and it's exhausting.

And so you don't have the energy.

You once had to take care of everything.

Um, so yeah.

I'm sure there are a lot of people listening who are saying, I can totally

relate to that because you don't necessarily have to have her past.

But if that's kind of the, the track that you're on, it is exhausting.

Once you, and, and then I also think about, you know, well, what about

if that one, that person retires?

Like, are they actually gonna get to relax?

Or are they gonna still go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

Mm-hmm.

The other thing is, if you're planting all of your seeds in the garden of

work, what happens when work is done?

When it's time to transition out of that or when you want to, you don't

even have anything to go home to that feels fun or engaging or life-giving.

So there's some challenges there too, as people transition.

I, I definitely do know that there's a piece of this that happens though at

such a deep level that it so me saying to her, well, stop working so much.

Well, that's not gonna work because one, it's just screaming

danger to her subconscious mind.

If the way you've survived is by hyper functioning and someone says,

stop doing that, you know you're not gonna be able to override it.

Yeah.

My husband says, um, it's like telling somebody who has depression cheer up.

Oh, that's a great example.

Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah, it's not, it's not as simple as that.

There's way too much going on.

It sounds like a great tool though.

I'm excited to, to give it a try to check it out.

So, I'm assuming you work with, older is probably the wrong word.

People who have been, you know, at work for a while are high achievers.

Maybe they're in corporate, maybe they run their own business.

Is that correct?

They're a little bit down the road.

That's how I describe it.

Not all the way down the road, but like a little bit.

They've traveled some and they've gotten somewhere.

Uh, so I tend to work with a lot of people in a sales capacity who can

increase their income by increasing, you know, what they're producing.

I'll work with people in industries like financial advisors who kind of the same.

That's a, a client acquisition type of a business.

It's a sales interaction right at the outset, but also.

I work with leaders in government, in nonprofit, in corporate

settings, or business owners.

I think the connecting tissue that I see, one, most of 'em are women.

That's one similarity.

Um, but two, while they don't always see it, they are leaders.

This is crazy and tragic, but originally all of the marketing for my business

was geared toward female leaders.

And what I found is.

So many women were self-selecting out because they did not see

themselves as leaders, that leaders that we had to change the

entire marketing of my business.

Now what happens is that it attracts leaders anyhow, and they end, you know?

But it's tragic to me that we don't think of ourselves as leaders when we're

impacting and influencing people so much.

That's so true.

That's so true.

And it's so interesting about marketing.

It talks to, you know how you really need to know your audience and you

need to talk to them, and you need to.

Hear, you know what they're saying and what they identify with because you just

picked a big one that they don't Yes.

Or this is, this is something I've been writing about and thinking

about a lot recently, is that a lot of my clients lead differently.

They're very collaborative.

They're very relational.

They're very much reading the room.

They're building relationships with people outside of the meeting.

They're listening a lot.

They may not be the loudest person in, in the meeting, at the board

table, at the whatever, and so they don't think they're leaders.

They think leadership is dominant.

Take charge, cast vision, have a microphone in hand,

uh, you know, be out in front.

And not that they can't do that, but it's not their go-to form of influence.

And so they are not framing themselves as leaders, not going for that next

level of promotion because they think, well, I'm not like that.

I just had this conversation three times last week where

I said, please don't be that.

We've already got that covered.

There's plenty of those.

Plenty.

We've got those in droves.

It's okay.

What we need is something different, something unique.

We need what you're bringing at that table.

Also, we also need the person who's saying, I'm not going

to work 14 hours a day.

I'm not going to do that just because I have VP in front of my name.

I'm gonna create a different example for people to follow where I'm honoring

my life outside of work and I'm showing up like a beast when I'm working,

like I'm really providing great value.

But I'm gonna provide an example that says you don't have to

sacrifice your entire life.

To do this and let's create a path for people who want that to

see and say, oh, I could do that.

I don't know if I could be that, but I could do that.

Let's, let's have more of that at those tables of influence.

Yeah, I love that.

So yeah, I love that you're doing this and helping people who don't recognize

their, their strengths and that, you know, they are leaders in positions.

That aren't necessarily the norm, thought of the norm as leaders.

So tell us a little bit about maybe some clients that you've worked with.

Obviously we don't need names, but you know, kind of where they were when

they came to you and then where they were when they left coaching with you.

This is so crazy.

I have so many.

Um, Bella, I love this question.

I'll talk about one that I just had a conversation with, and I'm

gonna kind of stick with this theme of leading differently because

that's how I would describe her.

When I met her, she was leading, she didn't know it.

She had basically transformed an entire department in her place of

work that was way underperforming, and now it is kind of leading.

I would say within the context of that organization leading the way and driving

most of the growth that's happening.

That being said, she has been told throughout her career

that she needs to be tougher.

She needs to be less emotional, she needs to be more take charge than what she is.

But she's leading, interestingly, she's leading Gen Z, millennials, and even like

the tail end of Gen Y people very well.

They don't want the take charge leader, and they also want relationship.

They want their leader to know them.

They want to be seen in their place of work, and she's

providing all of that, right?

Here's where the growth happened in her.

It wasn't in the way she was leading or working.

She's doing that amazingly well.

It was in her understanding of her value and her willingness to

pursue the next level of leadership.

One, she doesn't wanna leave her people to go to that next level, even

though she's more than prepared for it.

Right?

But she doesn't wanna leave her people 'cause she loves them so much and

she's built this really strong team and feels very like connected to them.

And so we've been talking about you're gonna create that in the new

place you go, but by staying where you are just because you like it and

it's safe and you know it, right?

But here's the other interesting thing.

She was sort of excluding herself from the, some of those higher level roles.

Um, one reason was just because she felt like the size of her body

wasn't the same as everyone else's.

If she couldn't get that under control, then she probably couldn't

handle the responsibility of leading at that higher level or because she's

doing it so differently than all the people who are currently at the table.

And she doesn't wanna become like those people.

She doesn't even know how to, you know?

So a lot of our work has been, you are rare and there is value in all rarity.

Therefore, you are valuable.

Instead of like becoming the clone of what has been promoted before, let's

make, let's stay with who you are.

That's working so well.

Let's stay within your unique genius.

But more than that, let's own your worthiness just as you are.

No change needed, like just own it and be it and step into that place

knowing that it's all you need.

Right.

I love that.

I love that because.

She was obviously getting the best out of the people in her team,

so she knew how to help them.

Probably in a gentle way it sounds like, become who their

best version of themselves.

So I hope that she obviously does recognize that now and I love that.

I love that you talked about understanding your value.

There's a lot of like, you know, you said you work mostly with women.

It doesn't surprise me because you know, they don't always

see their value and they.

The things that they're really good at, they think, well,

everybody's good at that.

You know, that's not unique to me.

That's just, you know, that comes easy for everyone when we have to

realize that's not actually the case.

It's the question in chapter two of my book, I ask the question, what do you do

that feels so easy to you, but astonishes everyone else, that's your natural genius.

And her and hers is definitely team building, developing people,

relationships, empathy, right?

But to her, that feels so easy and it's not seen as like these

leadership characteristics.

I disagree, but yeah, not traditional leadership characteristics.

Yeah, it's so interesting too 'cause um, we carry so much of this negativity

in our head, you know, it's like, oh, but I did, this was really good.

Yeah, but they did it better and, you know, you could have done it differently

this time and they don't see the value in that, just that re repeating negativity.

So I would assume that some of what you do is help them stop that.

Also, just, um, detaching all of these conditions from

our worthiness and readiness.

You know, what does the size of your body have to do with being able

to lead people like zero, right?

There are leaders of all shapes and sizes and ages and backgrounds

and genders and ethnicities, and they're leading so clearly.

There's not any connection that allows you to.

Lead better.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's her own, was her own belief.

Yes.

And just detaching that of like I am, therefore I am worthy, I am,

therefore I am valuable, period.

The end.

Not because I produce a certain outcome, not because I perform a certain way,

not because I lead a certain size team or make a certain amount of money.

When you own that and it's safe, you're safe in that.

Then you can go out and perform free from like.

Any risk to your value, and that's when you get your very best performance.

Ugh.

I love that.

This is so great.

So tell us a little bit about your books.

Is is some of this in your book to help people do it themselves, if you will?

Yeah, so it sure is.

I'll tell you who I wrote the book for because that's really important to me.

Uh, the reader I wrote the book for is a woman who is.

Ambitious.

She would like to have more influence, more income, more impact in the world.

Uh, but without more work, she's capped out and can't work any more hours

or just doesn't want to, you know, I don't wanna work harder to get more.

And so what do you do then?

And the core message of the book is that you can't outwork your thought habits.

Because for most of my people, if you could, they already would have.

Their problem is not work ethic.

You can't outwork your thought habits.

I love that.

That makes so much sense.

And it is, it's a habit.

It's like someone described it as, you know how like when water runs downhill

and as it keeps running and running this, this, um, crevice just keeps getting

deeper and deeper and it's a matter of, you know, how do you kind of close that

up and make it go in a different way?

Yep.

And then I think of it, so the habit finder measures risk.

So if you think about like TSA, when you get at the airport, when

there's a high risk of a, of a terror threat or whatever, what do they do?

They slow down, they become more aware of what's happening.

Just more observant, more curious, more paying attention.

They enlist the help of other people, so you bring in more staff, you

have more people there watching, you know, doing different roles,

and then you just really are more.

Um, conscientious.

So the same thing is true when you know you have high risk of a habit of thinking.

What do you do?

You slow down and you pay attention, and you observe what's happening

and you say, that's funny.

I'm wanting to have this reaction.

I'm aware that that's happening because it's helped me survive

for a really long time.

I'll talk to someone about it to like really help me reframe or

rethink the situation or maybe they even see something I don't.

Uh, and so that's the same thing.

It's not a vast, this is not a fixing.

This is just an unpeeling, like a new level of awareness and it's a

very gentle, compassionate process.

It's not like a checklist that we're attacking.

I love that.

Slow down, pay attention and become aware of what you're thinking and feeling.

Um, and it, that's funny you say that because sometimes I will find

myself all clenched up physically.

I'm, I've got something that's, that's driving me nuts and I don't recognize

that I'm physically all tensed up until I finally stop and say, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Breathe And breathing is important.

Um, so I know that there are people, Amy, who are listening to this

saying, oh my gosh, I need her book.

Where can they find your.

Absolutely you can get the paper back or Kindle or Audible versions,

um, anywhere you purchase books.

So Amazon, Barnes and Noble.

You can find them on bookshop.org if you like to shop locally or

at an independent bookstore.

Also, um, there's also a trove of fun resources on my website.

Under book, so it's amy kemp.com.

Um, I did a really fun sort of Oprah style, the first eight women who read

the book, I had them over for lunch and we sat in my living room and recorded

our conversation around the book.

So there's just some fun resources like that that you can

dig into on the website also.

But it is audible.

People often ask if it's my voice.

It is my voice.

So I read, I read the book so you can, uh, listen to it in my voice also.

That's good stuff.

I love audible.

On there all the time.

So, um, what is the specifically, the best way for them to reach out

to you if they want to learn more about what you do and how you do it,

and possibly, um, hire you for that?

Yeah, so my website for sure, so amy kemp.com, A-M-Y-K-E-M p.com.

I would invite you right on the homepage it says, take the free habit finder

assessment so you can take that, you get the results right away to your email.

Uh, and you can send me a message through the website as well, uh,

if you have something specific.

But I would invite you two to follow me on social media.

Um, Instagram is Amy Kemp Inc. And that's probably my most fun

place where you can find me.

So.

I love that.

I love the work that you're doing in this world, Amy, so thank you.

Thank you for helping the people who need it.

Thank you so much.

Oh, I'm gonna ask you one last question.

Okay.

If you could provide one tip to make the world a better place, what would that be?

Never apologize or feel guilty about spending a portion of your time, energy,

and resources on growing yourself.

It is the greatest gift you can give to the people you love and lead.

Um, it is a non-negotiable that there's a percentage of your time, energy, and

money that is invested in you Love that.

And it doesn't matter how old you are or how young you are

or what you do for a living.

Right?

That's so great.

What a great way to, to end this.

So Amy, thank you so much for being my guest today.

This has been inspiring and fun and I look forward to getting your book.

Thanks so much.

Thanks for joining us today on Blueprints for Brilliance Coaching Insights.

We hope you're leaving this episode with inspiration to take your coaching

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