In this deeply moving and wisdom-packed conversation, Olivia Nunn opens up about the moments that nearly broke her—and the profound resilience, faith, and leadership lessons that rebuilt her life. From 20 years of service in the U.S. Army, to navigating identity loss, divorce, suicidal ideation, and rediscovering her feminine strength through pageantry, Olivia brings unmatched authenticity and clarity to what it means to become unbreakable.

This episode is a masterclass in vulnerability, leadership, healing, and the courage it takes to rebuild your life one brave step at a time.

⭐️ Key Moments

🌟 The Power of Risking It All for Love & Life

Olivia unpacks her signature quote—“To have it all, you have to risk it all”—and how divorce, vulnerability, and rebuilding reshaped her relationship to love, identity, and success.

🌟 The Leadership Lie That Nearly Broke Her

She reveals the military-ingrained belief that asking for help equals weakness, and how carrying that pressure as a woman in a male-dominated field pushed her toward rock bottom.

🌟 Surviving the Storm: Her Rock Bottom & Road Back

Olivia shares the raw moment she planned her own death—and the divine intervention and phone call that changed everything.

🌟 Relearning Feminine Leadership Through Pageantry

From combat boots to 6-inch heels, Olivia explains how pageantry helped her reconnect to femininity and bring grace into her leadership style.

🌟 Veteran Leadership, Misconceptions & How to Support

She breaks down what civilian leaders often misunderstand about veterans—and simple, meaningful ways communities can support military families today.

Connect with Olivia Nunn

https://www.instagram.com/the_olivianunn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/olivia-j-nunn

https://olivianunn.com/

Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Legacy Lounge and you are in for a treat today. I am talking with Olivia Nunn, the CEO of Olivia Nunn Communications. She is also a podcast host of The Unbreakable Storm and a 20-year Army veteran who has helped transform her own journey throughout a lot of different transitions from divorce to personal battles into a platform that is literally helping to support Save Lives.

Olivia, know you've got the ever incredible quote, to have it all, you have to risk it all. And I would love to start with that and what that means to you. But give you a second to say hello to our audience and introduce yourself and share anything else that you would like them to know.

Hi, thank you so much for the chance to be on your show and to spend space spend time and space with you. So I'm looking forward to it.

Yes, I am too. And I'll be honest, the first time I read the quote and I have heard you say it and I've listened to other podcast episodes that you have, it really resonates with me to have it all, you have to risk it all. So could you start us out with that and what that means to you?

Yeah. So, you know, I think there's like a lot of quotes that I've read that have resonated with me and, from it's for me, where I thought like that for me, that was really personal was, from business and for love. And I put that together as I was coming out of divorce and I was grappling with this idea of how society looks at love, particularly like

There's like unwritten timeline about love. Like you're supposed to love or you can't love somebody until a certain timeline, whatever this magical timeline. And I kind of decided that I'm not going to listen to what society says. I'm going to be unapologetically me. And if I choose to love somebody at whatever timeline that is, that's just going to be me and not be afraid to say that I love this person.

wherever that journey may be. But I understand that when you open yourself up for that, you risk part of yourself. And I recognize that coming from a divorce and having been with somebody for 20 years, that's a really vulnerable space. And so in order to truly love somebody, you have to risk parts of yourself. And that's kind of where I sat with that in order to have it all to have this.

love to have this freedom to have financial freedom to have like this ability to live whatever life that you wanted. You have to double down. You have to risk everything. So whatever you put in, you have to, you know, take out. And so that's where that quote comes from was to have it all. You have to risk it all.

I love that and totally different love entrance here. But my husband and I dated for 10 years before he finally proposed. And we were long distance majority of that relationship, like seven hours driving one way, long distance. And we both were building our careers and we were attending weddings. And then those that got married started having their kids. And we were that couple that was like, are they ever gonna get married?

But we knew early on kind of what we wanted and that we were in love and went against society and the norms that we believe are rules, but they're actually not. And it is just, it feels really good to hear someone to really understand it's my choice. And yeah, if I'm going to give it all, I also have to understand I'm taking the risk of the hurt that can come with it. But I love this outlook and the share. And thank you for.

for believing in that the way that you do and representing that throughout your business too. It's amazing. So transitioning here a little bit, I know if we want to call it an awakening or a shift or just a monumental moment in life, something that resonated with me in some previous conversations with us is that the leadership belief that almost broke you in believing

that strength meant, you know, never asking for help, especially as a woman in a very male dominated environment, especially in the military, in the army, and walking through, you know, what that costed you by not asking for help.

Yeah. So the military is this unique environment and there's this perception that you have to be strong and competent and somewhere along the line. think I equated competence and strong as not asking for help.

I think that was the subliminal message that I picked up very early in my career. And also part of that was being a woman in a male dominated space. And because I spent a good part of my early part of my career being the only woman in that combat arms male dominated space. And I felt like, well, there was a lot of pressure that was definitely put on me. I also put a lot of pressure on myself.

And that pressure was, I can't screw this up. If I screw this up, then I'm going to close the door for any woman to follow behind me. So with that being said, I felt like if I didn't come to work being in the perfect part, whether that was looking the part or knowing the part, then I'm going to inadvertently shut that door. And so for me, I equated asking for help as a sign of weakness.

So although inside I was, my God, I don't have my shit together and I don't know what I'm really doing. Let me take a ton of notes to figure out what the heck are we really supposed to figure out how to do and go research that so that when I come back, I like actually know the answer. But I just I didn't know how to ask for help. And the impact to that, when you carry that load mentally, emotionally and physically and spiritually for such a long time.

Yeah.

It catches up to you. And then when you have events or trauma that is impacted onto your life, there's only so much that the body can handle. Right. I mean, there's a book about it. The body keeps score and yeah. And my body mentally, emotionally, physically just collapsed and I truly hit rock bottom. And I like to say from a visual perspective, because I'm a very visual person, it's like this box.

Yeah. Yep. had,

And every time trauma or crap would happen, I would metaphorically open this box, put that in and I would close the box. And we're like, we're not going to talk about it. We're not going to dissect the emotions. We're just not going to talk about it. We're like, yep, this happened. Shut the close up. And I did that for so long. And at the very end, when I was retiring from the army, which is a huge, traumatic, emotional, mental, physical thing that's going on, because my identity is wrapped in this, I was going through an unexpected divorce.

Yeah.

of somebody that I'd been with for 20 years. We were married for 16, but I was with him for 20 years, which was the span of my whole entire army career. And because I was so unexpected, that lid just didn't want to close anymore. And I had to come to grips with, with not only my retirement, my unexpected divorce, but all of the other things that I had just shoved into the box that happened throughout my career, my deployments, my moments of almost not coming back, my assault.

Yeah.

You know, all those things that I was like, for another day, another day. And it just came gushing out. And for me, that's where I felt like I couldn't, I couldn't handle it anymore. That's really was my first rock bottom moment that I felt like as an adult that I hit.

Yeah. I mean, there are so many relatable emotional and mental cues that for me just tapped into myself. I mean, I have like full body goosebumps because I feel exactly what you are saying in the emotion of what that feels like inside of myself from two very different experiences.

But I think the biggest one for me listening is that the identity loss because of having this incredible career in the Army for 20 years and having the stability and the security of knowing your partner for that long in that portion of your life, and you've become this person who you're comfortable being because it's who you've been, when you shift out of that, that...

arena of comfort and knowing and your identity is in that entanglement in every aspect and you choose to remove yourself in any capacity, you don't know who you are. You don't know who you want to be. You don't know what is life going to be like operating different because this is all I know for so long and it's who I've become. And shoving things into the box, whether or not it's asking for help or

Can you explain this or hey, this was a little confusing? That we don't wanna show as an option for someone to nitpick apart our strength as a woman, as a leader, as an influential voice in the room. And we don't wanna ask for anything because there's already eyes on us as the only females in the room. And you add the context of a male dominated space or even with your partner of I don't know what to do.

but this doesn't feel good or I'm scared. You know, how?

Yeah. And I constantly

felt like Carrie, right? This kind of shows you how old I am. Like the movie Carrie, like they're all going to laugh at me. Like I felt like I had to know the answer. Like there was no space to not know the answer. And I know that sounds crazy, but that's truly how I feel all the time. I mean, that that still is with me, even though I've been retired for four years. Like I feel like when somebody asks me a question, it's like.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

I cannot not say I don't know. Like that's like, you can't say that. Like I have to have an answer. You know? I don't know why that is such a beaten concept into me, but I feel like I can't give you the deer in the headlight look. And I cannot say, I don't, I don't know. Cause I, you know, I think about when I was a kid, like when your parents asked you a question, you're like, I don't know. Like it, it enraged your parents. What do mean? You don't know. And I'm like,

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yup.

Yeah.

Yes. Yup. Yeah.

So,

so asking for help, think for me has ingrained into me that it's a sign of weakness, but going through therapy, I've learned. And it's the exact opposite. It was first the hardest thing I've ever had to ask for was saying that I need help. And then recognizing that while it is the hardest thing that I've ever asked for, it is truly a sign of strength because it.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

While

it does open you up for vulnerability, it does show that you are human and that asking for help is a true sign of strength because it recognizes that you need to take time out for yourself. And in being aware of that, that is true strength.

Yeah. One, think, too, in the spirit of even the verbiage of unbreakable storm, which we'll get into some more detail here, too. What was the transition storm like in whatever you are comfortable sharing or you want context around? But kind of like the moments when you realized what was happening inside of you or with you was no longer going to be sustainable.

what that transition in the storm looked like. How did you perfect how the storm then changed your leadership beyond? Like a little preview through the storm and then what you took from that to then pour into how you're going to change your leadership and apply that in resilience of like, okay, I'm here, we're starting over, I'm at rock bottom, this is what I want to do and how you pivoted that.

Yeah. So, you know, when I, when I hit rock bottom and I think leading up to that moment, I, let me say that the army had taught me how to be an amazing planner, right? And as a planner, you plan courses of action, you know, and oftentimes it's three, four or five courses of action of, of ways in which that you're going to, plan in and around options.

And leading to where I hit rock bottom, I had actually planned three ways that I was going to end my life. And I had vividly laid it out to the detail and how I would execute any one of the three. And it was just a matter of when I was going to do it, because it was no longer about how it was when, because that's how broken I felt and how lost I felt.

And the day that I felt like this was the day that I was done and I was going to do it that day, there was a voice that just was like, no, you have to try one more time because I was trying to find someone to talk to. I had reached out to multiple options, different counselors, different nonprofits that I just, felt like I needed to talk to somebody.

whether it was to talk me off this ledge or just to like, just somebody to like tell me that I'm not, I'm not crazy. ⁓ I just, and to me it was my faith, right? I'm a follower of Christ and it was this voice saying, try one more. And so I tried one more nonprofit and was give an hour and I was like, okay, I'm going to try this. I'm going to look for one number and if they answer.

Yeah.

Then I'm going to try. And surprisingly enough, I ended up speaking to a counselor that day. She took my phone call and she spoke to me. And this is where faith comes in, Divine intervention. Not only did I end up speaking to somebody, she actually had been retired in understanding the military system. She had worked within the military system.

So she knew exactly how our behavioral health system worked while she was no longer working it. She knew exactly and she knew what what I needed to do. And because I was still active duty at the time, she was like, stop time out. Where do you live? Where's the local military installation to you? How far it is? And she just gave me a set of instructions. And there was something in me that kind of like shook me to the core where I felt like I was going to get in trouble if I didn't listen to her.

you

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I followed

what she did, what she told me to do. And I ended up checking myself into behavioral health that day. And that started me on the journey of, of my own therapy and my own treatment. and so for me, that was step one was seeking treatment, getting treatment. And it was very intense. was.

had taken accountability of where I was at and at the same time when I wasn't in therapy, I spent a lot of time reading the Bible, doing Bible study, was journaling a lot and for me it was where am I going to go with this? Where am I going to survive to the next day? Because up to that point it was a lot of blackout days, a lot of

I don't even know if I've, you know, did I eat today? Did I, you know, are my kids, are they well off today? And if it wasn't for my sister and from my mother, you know, who knows if my kids would have had, you know, the basic necessities. I mean, that's just how lost I was. to the point where I had chunks of hair fall out, I'd lost, you know, 20 pounds in, a matter of two weeks.

Yeah.

Yeah.

my face looked like I was a teenager all over again and massive acne. I mean, I did, I did not look good on the backs. Everyone's like, wow, you look great. I want to know how you lost all the way. want your weight loss plan. And I still to this day, I was like, you never want the weight loss plan that I went through. and, but for me it's where, where do I go from here? Where, where do I rise through this? Because I can't keep being where I'm at.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And for me, it was sitting in a lot of prayer. And, and I just, I shared just like one little snippet of where I was at and I got a ton of feedback from that. And when I got that feedback and most of it was purely positive, it, it felt good. And then at the same time, a light bulb went off of how being authentically vulnerable, being authentically who I was.

And because that's always how I've led as a leader in the military, I recognize that when you give space and breath to your own story, it allows others to see themselves and for them to want to share their story gives them courage to do the same. And that was my aha moment. That was my moment of. If I can do this and it can open a doorway for somebody else.

this is where I need to be.

So powerful. I first off just want to also thank you for sharing the context that you did. That in and of itself takes a ton of vulnerability, but also security and acceptance in yourself of, yes, like this is where I was and it was not good, but that also isn't going to define who I am and how I operate the rest of my life. And I think what's really incredible here is even...

in the midst of that chaos in your mind, in your life, in your body, in your reflection in the mirror, that you had even made the decision, I'm going to make one more phone call. And it clicked and you heard the voice amongst the chaos inside to just try one more time to get help. And it landed with the exact right person who heard you and saw you and helped guide.

you to get into the right movement that allows you to still be here today. It's just, it's incredible. And I think, I don't know if this was where I read this, but there's a quote that you've, you have said that resilience isn't about avoiding the storm. It's about becoming unbreakable within it. And I think that that is a beautiful depiction of that in resilience at its finest.

And I just, it opens the door for others to be able to see themselves and understand that, yeah, this really sucks right now, but it doesn't have to suck forever. And I just appreciate your context around this. This is very powerful.

No, thank you. And you know, something else I'd like to say is while that was a moment in my time, I think there's some myths that go with that. think people feel like, well, she's been there and she came back from that moment. You're done. You're all good. You're done. And that's not the truth. Like, I still struggle with depression and anxiety and I hit I still hit lows.

WAH!

Mm-hmm.

And I still grapple with those moments. In fact, you know, I just shared not too long ago that I've been at this low just with everything that's been going on with the economy and losing a job and still struggling with, know, who am I and am I providing a value to the community that I love so much? And so this is an ongoing battle. So this isn't just a one time. So this is something that I grapple with consistently. And so with that being said, I think it's

it's

super important to recognize that the actions that you can take for those that are in and around your community. Take the time out to make that phone call, to stop by and say hello, to reach out and do those what we call buddy checks, right? Because you have no idea how a message

of saying, Hey, I wanted to let you know that you've been on my mind, that I value this part of what you do can totally change how somebody sees themselves and how you could be truly, you know, stopping the negative thoughts that they have themselves and in doing so that they're going to choose to stay.

Yeah. Yeah, it's the, it is like an invisible lifeline that you don't even know that's your role in someone else's world at that day. But there's a reason that you are poked or pushed or prodded to say like, hey, you've been on my mind. I know it's been a while since I talked to you or, hey, I saw this and thought of you. I miss you. I'm thinking of you. It can totally change where someone else on the receiving end is in a moment that it really needs to.

to be there, so powerful. Kind of oddly shifting gears here slightly into almost like the transformational side of your leadership platform within the masculine area into what that looked like for balanced leadership. Because I think for a lot of the listeners, male and female here, but...

There is a bit of pageantry that kind of comes with the role, I'm assuming in the military, of seeming like the most, you know, unexpected. She's always polished and she's always put together and how the pageantry side of leadership in the army had an unexpected leadership lesson hidden inside.

Yeah, so I think when I say this, think people are surprised. I find pageantry a lot tougher than my time in the army. And here's why. While, you know, I was very put together in the army and I knew how to wear a uniform very well. And I, when I was not in uniform, I could wear

outfits and dresses and I love doing that and I was very polished as well. But there's a and I wore heels too. But there's a different set of grace when you're wearing six inch, you know, pageant platforms and these ball gowns and you are walking across the stage in in your fancy dress or in a swimsuit.

Yes.

or you're in an interview and you're giving these, you know, questions that are on time. It's a different type of grace that's required.

And while I felt like I was comfortable and confident and capable of leading into combat in an operations room in the army, I felt actually kind of lost and like a fish out of water in the pageantry world. And I had to relearn how to be graceful because I spent so much time in my masculine energy for 20 plus years.

Mm-hmm.

being in the military and I felt like I had to relearn how to get in touch with my feminine energy shifting into the pageant side. As much as I love dresses, I had to relearn everything. I mean, actually, I had to take I had to hire someone to teach me how to do makeup because my only thing I did in the army was eyeliner, mascara and lip gloss. That was it. And so, you know, doing a full face of makeup like I do today.

Yeah.

Like I had to learn how to do this and I still struggle with this. Right. So when I go to like a ball or a gala or something like that, like I hire someone out to do that because I'm my, my skillset is still not there. and it's not just the walk. It's also posing, right? Like, what do do with your hands and how do you stand? Where is your weight being shifted? Those are different skillsets than standing in combat boots and marching in a parade. Right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Where the precision is different. And I truly appreciate the skills that I've learned in pageantry and the sisterhood that I've gained in pageantry. It is a sport. When I started it and I picked and I got a coach in pageantry and I love my my patching coach, I have a fitness coach and an actual posing coach. She used to tell me all the time, pageantry is a sport. And when she first told me, I kind of looked at her like she grew a horn out her head. And then as I went through it after a couple of years, I'm like, yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

It is a sport. really truly is a sport. And I do appreciate how it's really helped me grow in my feminine side.

Yeah.

I mean, there are, I'm trying to think of two more different arenas of the army and pageantry. To have that in your repertoire is incredible because they're so opposite in skillset and in delivery. They're both incredible, but require very different things. And I think what's really cool is listening to you is that you've learned how to lead.

with both strength and grace. And I'm curious like how you have felt or seen that change your effectiveness as a leader because they're so opposite in skill set of where they come from, both very critically important, but how do you use that to your benefit of being an effective leader by balancing both your strength and your grace at the same time?

You know, I've been very fortunate that the women that I've been able to make friends with on the pageant side, especially those that are veterans of the pageantry, have really taken me under their wing and have been able to really, you know, tutor me and nurture me in that environment and help me rise as a queen. And then the same token, I've been able to help them from a leadership perspective, because those are the skill sets that I've gained as a leader and.

The things that I have to work through as a leader are understanding how to be a good follower. Right. I have this innate just want sometimes that when I see a problem, I want to fix it. And so I've had to learn how to just sit back and just kind of let things kind of fall and let the group and the dynamic kind of fix itself and also recognize that.

That's not always my position to fix or to lead that, you know, I'm not Lieutenant Colonel Olivia Nunn anymore. I'm I'm Olivia and my role is in a different capacity. And so, you know, how do you come in and guide somebody, you know, by like giving some recommendations without completely taking over? ⁓

Yeah.

And that's true in corporate America too, as I've taken on some jobs in corporate America, just like learning to really bite your tongue and go, okay, you know, especially when a lot of your bosses are, you know, 10, 15 years younger than you. And that has been a really tough pill for me to like really learn how to swallow at times because the military is a hierarchy and that hierarchy is based on rank. Well, not always, but 99

Yes.

Yep. Yep.

percent of the time because it's a hierarchy. It's also the age kind of coincides with that. So oftentimes your boss who's a higher ranked than you is oftentimes also older than you. So and because I'm Korean, that also goes very well with my culture. In my culture, it is an honor and a privilege to listen to somebody who's older. Age is a big deal. You give honor to someone who's older.

Thank you.

here.

And so for me, it's like kind of hard sometimes when you have a boss that's like 15 years younger than you, that's like telling you what to do. And in my head, I'm just like, but what, how, what have you done? Where have you lived? What have you, what have you lived through? And in my head, I'm like, I've done this, this, this, this, this. Okay. I'm just, I'm going to learn to be quiet and you know, so those are some of the challenges, but those are challenges and lessons in leadership, not only for the people around me, but truly for myself.

Yeah, yeah.

Yup.

Yes!

that's so well said. I got to share a story because to this day, it makes me laugh. To your point, the inverse of my time in corporate, I was that leader that was a lot younger than my direct reports. There was one position I held in property management specifically, and all the technicians and different buildings.

about to retire basically. And so when I came in for an introduction, get to know you and I introduced myself, there's one gentleman who his name is Bill and he's close family friend now. But the first thing he had said was, all right, kiddo, my t-shirt is older than you. Like, how are you my boss? And all I could do was laugh. And I was like, you know what, Bill, we're going to be best friends. You just don't know it yet.

Hahaha! ⁓

And lo and behold, years later, he attended our wedding after we finally got engaged and married and he had retired from Target. And I just think about that all the time because that is such a meaningful relationship to me because there's so much wisdom that he has from his tenure, from his experience, from his buy-in with the team, the rest of the team in any capacity.

But the first impression of, all right, youngster, like, what is happening here? It was very intimidating to me. But I knew my job was to not only ensure we deliver the results and the outcomes that we're chasing for the company, but to also build rapport and relationship to learn from him in that relationship and to learn about myself in a space that was safe enough that we could be real.

And I finally told him one day, like, you know, the t-shirt comment really stayed with me, but the beauty is what relationship came out of that, because there was so much that I had avoided previously out of intimidation and fear and, yeah, you're right. I don't know why I'm leading you. You have way more knowledge on this. But it allowed me to learn a lot about myself in that. And I just think it's a beautiful gift when you learn to slow down for yourself.

to and understand what is my role, even though I could lead and take over this situation, is that really, does that benefit everyone else to learn and grow alongside me and grow my ability to be patient and guide others to what they don't realize they're capable of doing yet? Just a funny plug that was on my mind. I also, love your no build and discipline framework.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

And I would love it if you could just break this down for our leaders listening who might be struggling right now with one thing or another. And if you could give an example of how a leader could even implement it this week of the episode releasing, that would be amazing. So the no build discipline framework.

I mean, I think for me, discipline has been such like a everyday part of my life. I grew up with, I'm first generation Korean American. My mom, I always say this, my mom could give any drill sergeant a run for their money. I grew up in discipline with discipline. And then I went into the army, which is nothing but structure. And so I think that when it comes to discipline is you've got to build structure in your day. Like that's step one. And

Something simple is making sure that every single day you wake up and make your bed first. I mean, there's there's plenty of videos and quotes about how an Admiral talks about how you, you know, wake up, start your day with making your bed. That's an accomplishment. Right. I'm a checklist person. You don't need to make a long laundry list of checklists for the day, but maybe five things that you're going to accomplish for the day and just sticking to small list of discipline.

What, and that discipline should be not only that you're going to commit to it, but you're committing to yourself and that's your spiritual side, your health side, and then the responsibilities that you have in the work life balance. Right. And what do I mean by that? I used to think that work life balance was this, this juggling aspect, like this work and this life. And you're supposed to like, do this equally.

And I realized that you can't do that. I think it's a, it's a way of in this season, define season. it a week? Is it a month? Is it a year? Whatever timeframe that works for your family, you're going to invest that focus to work. But you recognize that if it's for a week, if it's work focus, the next week, you've got to shift gears and now it's the family and the work has to take a backseat, but you've got to constantly rotate that. That's the balance. It's not.

They're both 50 50 because that's not real. That's not realistic. And I used to think that's what it was, but it's not. But it's having that honest conversation with your family on what that balance is. So the discipline is that you are disciplined to do that every single day. And here, let's just be honest. We're, people, we're human, we make errors. And when you fall off that track, you assess it, you figure it out. You're like, well, where did I make that mistake? And you get back on track the next day. It's like, it's like dieting, right? Okay. You had a bad day. You ate too much cake.

Great. Yeah.

Yeah.

The next day you don't throw it out. You go right back to to what you're going to work on, right? You go back to the gym the next day. Maybe it's not a 30 minute hike on the treadmill. Maybe it's 15 minutes, but it's a small increments every single day sticking to discipline.

Love, love that. You know, and I think for a part of the unbreakable storm vision is not everything does go perfect to plan once we even think we have it figured out. But the most important part of what I just caught you said too is that you still show up and you try and you give your best effort that day. And so if you...

have a goal of your diet and then Halloween hits and you have candy, it's okay. You reset tomorrow. Not even waiting until next Sunday or Monday to align with the calendar. You commit to yourself, this is what I'm doing. It's okay. Give grace and get back to discipline with strength the next day. I just, I love it. I love the influence.

And you know, that's really

comes from the army, right? Because we always say no plan survives first contact, right? Every plan. And like I said, the army made me a great planner. It doesn't matter how perfect I think that plan is going to be. No plan survives first contact. So you just you plan, you hope for the best, right? But you plan for the worst. That's the other part that we say. And you just keep moving.

Mm-hmm.

Yes. Yes.

Yes. Well, I know the impact of the work that you're doing is incredible and is landing amongst a lot of different people. And I think the ripple effect of the vulnerability side of the work that you do in sharing your openness about suicide had stopped others from ending their lives. How did sharing your darkest moments become

such a strong leadership tool. Now, because of that, just because of that resounding impact that I see across the board from the work that you do.

I think for me, it's been, I've got to say it's probably been more personable and, and if I got to be honest, probably selfish, right? And what do I mean by that is the times that I'm, I'm sitting in my lowest lows and I'm just questioning what am I doing? Why am I even doing this? I will get a message out of the blue of the work that I am doing or the work that I've done or the posts that I've made of how it has changed someone's life.

of how it's helped them. And that's what reminds me of like why I'm doing what I'm doing. Right. And they may or may not be somebody that I know. Oftentimes, you know, 80 percent of the time it is somebody that I actually don't know. It is somebody that who does follow me that I don't have a personal connection with that they, you know, have seen my post or someone connected them to a post that I've sent out. And and that

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

means the world to me.

Well, I just want to applaud the courage that it takes to not only share it once and then move forward and through that and feel okay and grounded, but to root so strong, balanced in that, in owning this was a part of me and I own it and I'm okay, but I also want to talk about it because it isn't on headlines everywhere, but I know that it's what people are struggling with.

Thank you for being a voice that is in the community for others to see and that it is helping and resounding whether or not you know them or not. Thank you for being one of those voices. One other thing too is leading, I think your lens of service is beautiful. And a lot of your work and your mission bridges the gap between military and civilian worlds, which is needed.

No, thank you.

But I think it's really, really intimidating for people to understand. So what is one thing that civilian leaders need to understand about veteran leadership that could help bridge that understanding?

gosh, I could probably talk about a ton of things. You know, here's the thing. The value of a veteran brings so much to your community, to your workspace and

Believe it or not, you probably have more veterans than you recognize because oftentimes veterans won't self identify, let alone claim the title that they're veteran. There's so much stigma when we say veteran. America has this notion that veterans are broken, that we all have PTSD.

And when we say we have PTSD, it's this negative connotation of PTSD. And, and with being broken that, you know, we're a harm to everybody, because of our PTSD that we're going to harm ourself, our children, our neighbors. mean, again, the news can sensationalize that we've probably seen those stories, but that's not every veteran.

And while many of us have invisible wounds because of PTSD or TBI, we're more often not harmed to ourself than anybody else. But what we bring to the workforce, what we bring to your community is discipline, dedication, loyalty.

a team member, all the values that you would want in your community, at your workplace, right? They bring in soft skills. They bring in leadership skills that you cannot train anywhere else. It is embedded into us. And the other part is I want America to understand that we might be a little off in the way that we speak. We have our own unique vernacular.

Yeah.

We have a we have a different body language, right? Some of us talk with our night with our hands. We call them knife hands, right? But I guarantee you, we're probably the most dedicated, loyal member you'll ever find on the team. But the other part that I want your listeners to know about veterans is our community does lack the resources to assist us in certain aspects in our recovery, such as mental health. Right.

We have served proudly for our country. just, we just can't keep up with the necessary, you know, health coverage, health, resources that are necessary because of our service, right? Whether it's TBI, invisible wounds. And that's not just for the family. That's not just for the military member, but also for the family members and their children. And so yes, is TBI is mental health, are those things an impact to our community? A hundred percent.

But those aren't negative things that should turn people away from our community. And the other part is we also have a conversation of being food scarce within the military community that oftentimes that people aren't aware of that military families oftentimes can't feed their families. And so a way to give back to military communities is, you know, food donations, diapers, canned goods. so military families are proud.

They're not gonna say this.

Yeah, so powerful. Thank you. Thank you for that. And thank you for the articulation of that for listeners everywhere and in how to help support take action this week because they deserve it. And it's not very easy or not. It is easy. It is not very publicized how to support your veterans in your backyard local community today. But now everyone has something that they can go do to support them. I love it.

You know, that's how you help.

I wanna, as we start to head towards a wrap up of this interview here, you said the biggest failure is letting fear stop leaders from chasing their dreams. So what is your advice for someone who might be listening right now who is paralyzed by that fear and that is what is currently stopping them? What would you wanna say to them?

I think it kind of goes back to a little bit of what I said. There's this idea that you think that you're Carrie, that they're all going to laugh at you. And the truth is the only person that's going to laugh is yourself. Right. And and I say this knowing that I'm constantly in this cycle to we're so wrapped up in looking at social media and doing this comparison of life and thinking that I'm not special enough or not enough or I want it.

I can't instead of recognizing that honestly, most people are so engrossed in their own life that they're not really looking at you. Right. And so don't let fear stop you from doing whatever it is. In fact, everything that you want, we've heard this is on the other side of fear, but I'm to take it a step further. Freedom is on the other side of fear. And so.

When you push yourself, you know, it could be something as simple as I want to do my first triathlon, right? Train for that. I want to start a business. You know, I want to fly, right? I want to fill in the blank, right? The only person that is stopping you is you. And I, my list of things that I want to do.

It's so long. It's probably just as long as my bucket list of places that I want to go and the only person that's stopping me is me and then probably some money, but it's just me and I think that's I think if you follow me on social media, that's I think what people are seeing is that I'm doing it for me. It isn't about social media. It isn't about likes. It is me. These are all the things that I wanted to accomplish as a child flying, you know, like

Yeah.

jumping out of a plane is still something that I want to do, right? Being a scuba diver, I want to do that. Like all of these things, are they scary? 100%. But I want to do those things because those are all the things as a child that I'm like, man, that would be so cool to do X or Y. So the only person that is stopping you is you and no one is going to laugh at you. The only thing is you've got to try. And what's the worst thing that's going to happen if you try that you find out

Yeah.

Yes.

It isn't for you and you don't like it or you find out that this is the most amazing thing ever and you want to keep doing it again. I mean, you only live one life as someone who's almost died a few times, right? Who shouldn't be sitting here and I'm talking about those, those times in growing up in college and also in combat that I look back if it wasn't for God watching out for me. shouldn't be sitting here right now. You have one life.

Yes.

Yes!

Take it.

Yes. Well, I think this is perfect segue into our closing. As you know, Maya Angelou said, will not forget what you say, but they do not forget how you make them feel. As leaders listening, thinking about their own leadership, their own legacy, their own choice in the control that I am the one that's in control to say, let's do it.

100%.

What do you want them to remember from you?

I think more importantly is the legacy that I'm leaving behind. I want people to remember that I was part of a community, a military community that gives and that I was part of that giving community. But more importantly, that if you've, if you ever have the opportunity to meet me, that however you met me, if you follow me, I'm one in the same, that I've lived my life authentically one in the same.

And I think that is a true test of leadership that you are authentically leading and living your life and that what you give out, you truly give back. And if you are authentically living each and every day to the best ability, and we all fall short, right? But if you're authentically living your true self and being kind,

I think that's the best way to live.

Yes. Well, I, as a woman raised in a military household of a dad in the Navy and all of my uncles, all of my grandparents that served, thank you for your service, your 20 years of service in the Army. Thank you for the work that you do today and the way that you lead. And thank you for choosing to lead from a scar.

instead of leading from a wound because it's allowing your messaging and your mission to resonate at large to people that really need to hear it and that need your voice and your work in their life. So thank you for everything that you are doing and know that you've got a supporter in me rooting for you all day every day.

To close out this episode, where can people connect with you? And we will include your website, podcast, and social platforms in the show notes. But anything connection-wise that you want to leave with the audience.

I'm on almost every platform, LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook.

underscore Olivia Nunn or Olivia Nunn, depending on the platform. my two podcast series will be launching here soon, Women of War and Unbreakable Storm. And look forward to connecting with anyone who wants to be part of that story. And I appreciate just having time with you today. I appreciate it.

Thank you, Olivia. Listeners everywhere, continue to lead authentically and build a legacy that you can be proud of too.