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Dead America - Ed Watters EPISODE 7, 14th April 2021
Kellan Fluckiger

Kellan Fluckiger

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Kellan Fluckiger

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

people, life,

money, create, depression, forgiving, podcast, perseverance, excusing, truth,

coach, Kellan, world, question, started, kinds, years, blame, optimism, joy

SPEAKERS

Kellan

Fluckiger, Ed Watters, Gareth Davies




Ed Watters 

00:00


If you

like Tony Robbins, you're gonna love our guest today. He's a powerhouse when it

comes to motivating you He is the catalyst for getting things done. Today we

are talking with Kellan Fluckiger. He is that person that you want in your

corner to get things changing to get things motivated and to help you push

forward. I highly recommend you looking Kellan up and getting involved with

him. Everybody needs a coach. And I'm sure with Kellan's story, he can help you

achieve your ultimate life. Let's not waste any more time and get into today's

episode.



Gareth Davies 

00:45


Hello,

good evening. Good morning. Good afternoon, wherever you may be around this

wild, wacky, and sometimes disturbing world of ours. Yes, that's the intro to

the mindset podcast, a weekly attempt to open eyes and shedding light on what's

really going on in the world. All done by ripping apart the media madness that

masquerades as news. Join me, Gareth Davies. Every Sunday on the mindset

podcast. You can find the show on all major podcasting services such as iTunes,

Stitcher, and so on or you can go directly to the main mindset website. That's

www.mindsetcentral.com. Check out the mindset podcast bring your curiosity, your

opinions, and a sense of humor. And remember that some worldviews are stranger

than others.



Ed Watters 

01:51


To

overcome, you must educate. Educate not only yourself but educate anyone

seeking to learn. We are all Dead America. We can all learn something to learn.

We must challenge what we already understand. The way we do that is through

conversation. Sometimes we have conversations with others. However, some of the

best conversations happen with ourself. Reach Out and challenge yourself. Let's

dive in and learn something right now. Today we have Kellan Fluckiger with us

Kellan, could you please introduce yourself, let people know a little bit about

you, and how you got to where you are today, please?



Kellan Fluckiger  02:55


 Well, that's a long story. I'm 65. And I have

lots of history. So I spent, I've had an interesting life and career as a

executive, as a musician, as a recording artist, as a career consultant in

energy markets. And in the last 10 years, I've spent all my time transitioning

to being a full-time business and life coach. I just say coach for clients

around the world.



Ed Watters 

03:24


You have

spent your life going through a lot of things. You say that you come out of a

depression, addiction, life-threatening illness, and a near-death experience.

The cage breaker, you tout that you are a cage breaker and the catalyst to get

it done. Makes sense once you dig into the story of who Kellan really is, let's

get into the details of the depression first because a lot of people deal with

depression.



Kellan Fluckiger  04:00


Well,

I'm happy to talk about it. And even though it's very stigma a lot you know

once in a while, like a few years ago, Robin Williams committed suicide and and

then you know, those kinds of things happen. And then it raises its head and we

talk about it for a little while and then it goes back down underneath the

radar is yesterday's news. My stuff started early, I was brought up in a very

strict religious household where if you didn't do good, it wasn't just be a good

boy, Johnny, it was you're you're going to hell and it was enforced with a lot

of physical punishment stuff that today would be felony child abuse. And so

there was a lot of that and the consequence of that for me, really, and it was

over everything. It didn't matter grades at school, how I behaved, whether or

not I told the truth every time, and then I learned to lie to protect myself and

everything else. But the consequence for me was I internalized a truth isn't

true, but I internalized it and that was I'm not good enough, and I never will

be. And so I spent a couple of really sad, but pervasive things came out of

that I became a liar, a pathological liar practically to protect myself. And

that spawned this. I have a really, really good memory. So I never got caught.

And I was able to just sort of remember everything. But it made me live in a

world that was not true. I said, whatever I wanted to say, to protect myself

and that was not good. And it's not good enough means that I went on a rampage

for decades, trying to get the approval of was principally my mom who was the

disciplinarian, the violent disciplinarian, I guess, and I needed to prove I

need to get her approval. And so that led me to when I was a kid in grade

school apathy, and I got crappy grades. But when I went to high school and

university, I got good grades, and I got straight A's, and I mean, honor roll

and, and then I got in business and I got high positions and got elevated and

got up into companies and you know, got senior-level executive positions and

made a lot of money. But at the time, I was never feeling good enough,

everything was not enough. So I always had this fear of being found out the

imposter syndrome, we call it all kinds of stuff. And at the same time, because

my true love was music, and music was not okay as a career in the context of my

upbringing, because musicians are bad people, they do drugs, and they are, you

know, immoral, then I couldn't be a musician. And then I ended up being all the

things that my mother was afraid I would be, even though I was in business, I

ran a recording studio on the side for a while. And then I buried the whole

thing. By burying it, I sold it off and just got out of it and pursued the

executive and consulting career with a vengeance. So that career took off. I

made a lot of money. And I testified before Congress and I had big contracts in

the United States and Canada, did a bunch of stuff. But behind the scenes, I

was a drug addict. I was destroyed relationships, the typical thing you see in

movies, where you have a double life, very, very high profile, facing the

world, and everyone would have looked at me and said raging success. But in

behind the scenes, I was an addict, I was destroying relationships, I ended up

getting married and then divorced three times, and the battleground behind me

and had other relationships, besides the official marriages that were all also

disastrous. And it was all because two things one I believed that I couldn't be

good enough, and two every single time I got somewhere that looked good,

meaning I got a big promotion, got a bunch of money, got a big position, or

whatever. My internal clock or thermostat said you shouldn't be here, this is

not okay. And so then I would begin the slow or rapid process of self-sabotage.

So then I would start to do things that would undermine it. And eventually, I

would either leave or the position would fall apart, or I'd get fired, or the

relationship would end and I'd get divorced. And that happened over and over.

And over, I listed the number of times I started with drugs when I was 12, on

and off at different periods, and I listed the periods of, you know, drugs, or

relationships, or addiction or divorce, and to the life from 12 to 55, is when

I finally realized what was going on, and finally got some help. I never talked

to anyone, I never who's you know, taboo to talk about your personal problems,

because you shouldn't have them anyway and you suck if you do that kind of

doctrine. And so I never talked to anybody. And I just kept trying to do this

on my own. We're probably 20 different episodes varying in length from two

years, to five years, during that 40 years. So there's almost no time, zero

years where I wasn't in trouble. Somehow, seriously in trouble. Whether or not

one area affected the other and it just depended, I was quite successful at

hiding, stuff, functioning addict, functioning alcoholic, etc., etc. but I

personally as a person was miserable. And at the same time, I learned to be

completely disconnected from my feelings. I remember saying once to someone in

2000, which was 20 years ago, and about seven years before this all came to a

head in 2007, which I'll get to in a minute, that divine intervention that

changed everything. I said to somebody, I can be anybody you like, tell me what

I need to do and I can be that. And I could do it so convincingly kind of like

character actors. And it didn't matter if it was a social situation a business

situation, I could be that. And inside, I had no feeling I was just playing a

part. And I could do it really well. So I was just sort of sick individual

afraid of being found out, having tons of secrets to find out, knowing that I

wasn't good enough, desperate to win the approval of those who would never give

it for decades. So that's how depression manifested itself for me through all

of those years, until the end of 2007. So that would have been when I was 52.

And, finally, at that time, I had a 17 hour out-of-body experience, divine

experience and you know that voice said, that is enough, or it is enough, not

that it isn't enough. And I realized that you know, this is time to change my

life. So I'm 50 something years old. I've never talked to anyone I've been, I

was at the time a practicing addict, like 1000s of dollars a week is this level

of severity. And I was making so much money that it didn't matter. It was lunch

money. And, and that experience made me go from $3,000 a week as a coke addict

to zero in one day, throw it away. And I said, Okay, I got to do something

different. I walked away from the contracts I had, which were, you know, very

lucrative contracts millions of dollars worth of stuff, and said, I gotta start

over in my life, in my mid-50s. So I did that. And that that divine

intervention was the thing that started me on the path to healing. It wasn't

sudden healing, but it was, we've got to do something different. So part of

that divine intervention was, this is a funny story. For those that are

interested, all of the details are written in a book that I wrote called

Tightrope of depression, my journey from darkness, despair, and death to light

love and life, which is on Amazon if anyone's interested. So part of the

divine intervention was after that 17-hour out-of-body experience Two weeks

later, I hadn't quit yet. That whole process of resigning and leaving took

about a month. About two weeks later, I got tickets to a very high profile,

performance, musical performance in a very expensive venue in a city I was

working in. And I got that kind of stuff all the time. Because the positions I

held I got the things that would have been, almost bribes, you know, all kinds

of gifts, right? And so I had these two tickets to see this concert. For those

of you that do classical music, the performer was Yo-Yo Ma cellist, who is a

spectacular and electrifying performer anyway, I was single again for the third

time. And so I had an extra ticket. And I gave it away to somebody in the

office. I said, Who wants classical music? Who wants to go see this? And then

this lady came and said, I want it. I said, Have I ever given you anything

before? No. Okay, good. We'll see you there. So we met at the venue. And

partway through the night at the performance which was like this, like I said,

electrifying, I had this overwhelming feeling which I had very recently come to

recognize that voice said to me to marry this woman. And I said, Yeah, not

gonna happen. I haven't done so well in that department. Let's just drop that.

And then after the performance, it was there were backstage passes, of course.

And they came back and said, and you need to tell her tonight. And so I argued

quite a bit and lost the argument. So I did and it went about like you would

have expected she freaked out left, and we hadn't come together, so that was

fine. Anyway, later, it's her own experience. Within two weeks, we were

together. We got married three months later after I had quit the position, she

resigned from her positions. And we just struck out on this new adventure. And

that was 13 and a half years ago. So she knew me and she knew me during the

time I was, you know, managing supervising the senior executive director of

that position. She knew I was in trouble. She knew me. But I didn't know her

very well. But everybody knew me because I was the boss, Big Boss. So she knew

that and she took a chance. Anyway, she had her own set of experiences that

said, this was right. And that was a, you know, there were several things that

out of body experience, then meeting her in that spectacular way. That made it

clear to me that there was something else besides what I've been doing for the

last 40 years. And so that's where it started. And that put us into 2008. At

that time, after I walked away from all that I said, Okay, what do I know how

to do we're going to do something completely different because I'm done with

that other stuff. And I had a couple offers to be CEO's of small companies in

the energy industry, which is what I've been in and I turned them down. Because

I knew it would take me right back to where I was. So I said, I'm not doing

that. And I didn't know what I was going to do. And I said, Well, what I know I

know how to do is I know how to help people do impossible things because

that's what I'd been. That was my career was built on that guy you call when

stuff has to get done that can't get done. Okay. So that's what I knew. And I

thought, well, what is that? I think that's a coach. So I decided I would study

and become a coach because what what I knew skill was that I had was to help

people do hard things. So I did that. And gradually, over the first few years,

which would have been eight to 12, 2008 to 2012. You know, I came to grips with

the decades of depression. And finally, in 2012, I began talking to a shrink and

experimenting with way admitting I have depression and I was diagnosed with

severe MBD that probably started in my teens, which is why I say that. And so

then I just began working on that. And, and my work today isn't really at all

focused on depression, per se. But what it's focused on is people who live with

a story that makes them addicted to mediocrity, settling for what's easy and

obvious instead of what's possible. And I took the words cage breaker because

cage is how we often live, we're trapped in a cage, we can see through the bars

what we want, and we reach for it, we can't get there. And cage is an acronym

that stands for in the negative sense. Compare, abandon, grumble and excuse,

or, in a positive sense, create, achieve, grow, enjoy. And so breaking a cage

is a metaphor for doing what I did, which is I'm done, I'm going to do

something different. And in the process, since that time, I've written 13 books

and done a bunch of other stuff. I speak in a lot of places, etc, etc. So this

is a long monologue. But that's kind of some detail about what happened.



Ed Watters 

17:17


Yeah,

that's great. We love long monologues because it gets inside. And people

really need to understand each other, this how we change ourself. And that's

what Dead America is about. service to others, you tout this in everything you

do in your social media. I love that, you know, helping others no matter where

you are in life, money is nice. But doing what you can, with what you have is

action, and not excuse. You do that very well. How to get organized enough, out

of all of the chaos in your mind to become a great coach like this.



Kellan Fluckiger  18:07


It's not

an accident. So the divine intervention I talked about just got me to stop

being an addict. But it didn't create a coach and it didn't create the keywords

that I use, and you used the beautiful one that is one of my most powerful. I

have three words that drive my life, love, create, search. And those are the

three words that I judge every action by but those didn't come magically or

automatically during those first few years. Eight to 12 or 13,14. As it goes

along. You evolve. And I said, Okay, I want to be a coach, what does that mean?

How do I help people? How do I talk to them? What does it mean to be a coach?

So I went through some coaching stuff, and they didn't teach me how to help

people do hard things because I knew how to do that. But they taught me

frameworks and stuff that are used in the coach process. So I went and did some

studying. But I realized what Kellan realized is lots and lots and lots of

coaches, life coaches, business coaches, dating coaches, acting coaches,

whatever, I realized that what what resonated and appealed to me was use a

cliche, maybe unleashing your true potential, which you've probably heard a

million times. The truth is you as you do this podcast series, everybody that

listens to it and me, we're all created by the same God who is a divine being

that had an intention for this. It's not an accident. We feel that yearning to

serve that you talked about, because that's how we were built. And we've beat

it out of ourselves or created competition and the need to be cool in a way

that has has dampened that and in some cases destroyed it. But that's still a

yearning that we feel and that yearning to serve is what brings to fulfillment,

and so love creates a server that I can love somebody without their permission,

I can choose to be a vessel of love and to be kind and to emanate light, I can

choose to do that I don't need anybody's permission. I don't need anybody to

lie to me or anything else for that. And so that's in my control completely.

And create is the second word. And by the way, love is the most powerful force

in the universe and the foundation of everything good. So why wouldn't that be

the prime directive? Create is just, it's a manifestation of our true nature,

that we're all creators. Everybody has gifts, talents. Some people have

developed them. Some people haven't. Some people think they don't have them.

Some people think well, I might have to make all kinds of excuses. But the I

have a podcast series too called Your Ultimate Life. And I define your ultimate

life as a life of purpose, prosperity, and joy that you create by serving others

with your divine gifts. And prosperity is cool. I've been in a place where I

had so much money, I didn't know what to do with it. But I was miserable. And I

certainly wasn't serving anybody. In fact, I was damaging people right and

left, myself included. But I was certainly wasn't the only one by any stretch.

And so that create is just an invitation, or a directive, how you depends on

how you want to hear it, to seek out and develop them, use your divine gifts to

do good stuff. To create good add good to the world is one way I like to say

that. And the third word serve, is our inclination. We are biologically built

to do that there's a flood of oxytocin that's released as a, as a community

feel-good hormone that we feel when we do good things for each other. And we

participate in community projects and steps are built to do that. And service

is the manifestation. In real life of love. Like Love is a word. It's really

not it's an action, it's a verb, and you see it when people make a choice to

use the resources, whether they're physical or spiritual, or emotional or

mental resources, to bless somebody or to serve them or to lift them up or to

alleviate suffering, or however, you want to describe that. And so, I measure

everything I do, the books that I write, how I do my coaching, the podcasts I

do, the videos I create, is there some way that I can serve somebody, or say

something in a way that this will resonate with someone to say, you know what,

I need to wake up to my own divinity, I need to stop settling for mediocrity.

I'm going to start today and at least take the first tiny step to change.



Ed Watters 

22:52


That's

wonderful. Your your podcast is one of the best podcasts that I've listened to,

by the way. And I highly recommend it to everybody, because it shows details

that people normally don't look at. So get over there and check out the

podcast, we'll leave links in the show notes for that, for sure. Now, part of

building your ultimate life, it's forgiving yourself, forgiving yourself, it

opens up the doors to productivity. Can you talk to us a little bit about that?



Kellan Fluckiger  23:32


I'd love

to forgiveness is it gets me emotional, even as I think about it and talk about

it. And I'll tell you why. I don't do things unless they're open and real. So

some of the things that I talk about are still open and real. For me, I don't think

at all that I've reached someplace that I'm whatever because I don't I do

meditate two hours or more a day, I'd have spiritual experiences all the time

and a great connection to divine, but I built that. But I still have lots of

stuff that I want to and I'm working on cleaning up. So for example, I have 10

kids, most of the 10 children don't talk to me, because of the year because of

the broken relationships and the drug addictions and everything else. They

blame me for all the struggles they've had in their life. Now we're all

responsible for our stuff because we're all adults and you know, in their 20s

30s and 40s. And so I get all that but they still we still as people sometimes

want an escape goat. So I have a lot of work and it's a lot it's a difficult

thing to to live with that. And so without forgiveness. Some people confuse

forgiveness with excuse excusing forgiveness is not excusing somebody I heard

somebody say the other day. Wow, that was really bad to do. I hope I can

forgive myself. Well, I do too whoever said that. But there's more pieces to it

than that. If you go to any of the addiction recovery programs called Step or

any of them, and I've been to a million of those, they all have the idea of

some kind of restitution. So, a lot of times when you hurt people or do things,

you can't fix it, it's unfixable. That's fine. I mean, it's not good that it

happened. But it did. We can't change the past. But there's two problems. One

is you don't control and you never will, whether somebody else wants to move

into forgiveness, or will forgive you or get past what you did, or what they

think you did, or what they have allowed what you did to do to them. And you

don't control that. So what you do instead is you do everything you can, that's

reasonable to apologize and to make it right. And sometimes the best you can do

is to just be a light going forward. Because many things that we do, or say to

one another can't be fixed in the, you know, to come back and fix. So you'd be

good, do good, be a light, and you know that stuff going forward. So that is in

the context of that forgiveness, you don't control whether others forgive you,

you as an individual forgiving others because none of us get through life

without having been bashed, crashed, and hurt sometimes accidentally, and

sometimes very calculated and intentional. If you carry around anger toward

that person, any time at all, you're limiting your ability to connect with your

power, you're carrying a bag of rocks you don't need to carry, your backpack is

full of stuff that you can't ever get rid of. That person may not care, that

person may never ask forgiveness, that person may ask for forgiveness. And you

may choose not to forgive them and hold on to grudges and anger. Somebody said

once it's like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die, you

can't do that, or you can but if you do, you're holding yourself down. You're

wearing lead shoes all the time when you're trying to fly. So choosing and it

is an internal process of choice to forgive and let go of the anger and

resentment and negativity towards someone else is essential. If you're going to

do anything about reaching the full potential. Now, that doesn't mean to put

yourself in harm's way it doesn't mean to ignore the fact that something is

dangerous or someone is dangerous. It doesn't mean that that would be stupid.

But what it does mean is to quit carrying resentment, negativity, and

understand that each of us including that person over there is on their own

path. And I don't control what they do, how they feel, and where they are any

more than they control what I do, how I feel, and where I am unless we give them

that authority. So that deals with others forgiving you It deals with you

forgiving others, then we get to the hardest. Sometimes the hardest moments is

forgiving yourself. That issue of forgiving myself was really, really difficult

for me. And here's why. All of the things that my kids and others blamed me

for because I was just depression thing where I'm not good enough. I willingly

accepted that. And I lived in the place of self-loathing, I hate myself for

everything I am and everything that I've done, that I've done, nothing can fix

it. And it will never, ever, ever be okay, I had one ex who said, I wish I

could wake up in a world without you. And she was trying to encourage me to

commit suicide, which I tried a couple of times. And she desperately wanted me

to and her mom had committed suicide. And so she was trying to encourage that

as a manifestation of her anger and hurt because our relationship was had

fallen apart. And you know, I used that used to make me mad at everything. It

doesn't make me anything anymore. I just feel sad. For those who live in that

hurt and bitterness anyway, self-forgiveness is not excusing. It's not saying

oh, well, I did that bad thing. Gee, I hope I forgive myself, wow, I need to

forgive myself. That isn't it. I'm only human. None of that stuff is what I'm

talking about. Forgiveness is simply a turning to a new way of being. And if

you cannot, if I cannot turn to a new way of being and accept the process of

change and grow, then essentially I'm damning or dooming myself forever to live

in a state of non-productivity, blame, and self-loathing. And I did that for

years. And that was the driver for lots of the alcohol and drugs and then the

attempted suicide event. So the learning that forgiving yourself is not

excusing, willful, and callous, and cruel acts that you may have done or did do

to others. You might look back and say how could I have done such a thing? And

the answer is, I don't know. I was cruel it was was wrong, but to live forever

in that self-hatred and loathing. and accept the lie that you can never do

anything good again, or be okay because you did that. All that does is rob1

yourself and the world of all the good you could do from today, forward. So I'm

not advocating excuses, I am advocating eliminating bad behavior, changing, and

being a light going forward. And in that context, stopping, or ending carrying

the big bag of rocks, that weigh us down, when we live in that negative place,

where forgiveness is not part of our life, any one of those three ways that I

talked about.



Ed Watters 

30:42


Yeah,

that's an interesting take. So, on your website, you have five principles to creating

your ultimate life. And the first one starts with truth. Truth is something the

world is really lacking nowadays. And being able to own up to your own actions,

takes that first step in truth. Could you walk us through a little bit about

the principles of creating your ultimate life and how you came up with those?



Kellan Fluckiger  31:17


 Yeah, and I don't have it in front of me. So

sometimes I get the order mixed up. But let's do them one at a time. Truth is

the foundation of all of it. And I teach a seminar called Five Essential

Principles for Successful Entrepreneurs, about entrepreneurship. And it's, the

first one is the same principle. I don't call it truth, I call it taking

responsibility. But it's founded on the same thing. I lived personally for a

long time, pretending that I could blame my mom who beat me a lot. For

everything that was wrong in my life. I blamed, I  pretended I could blame, you know, depression

or anything else. Those are, those are factors, those are things that happen to

us. And so they may contribute to whatever they contribute. But telling the

truth, not only is okay, I did that thing, I take responsibility, but it is

also and I now take responsibility to do whatever I need to do to get better,

to improve, to grow. So telling the truth. I use that in the book, The Results

Equation, which is a book about from dream to done in five simple steps. We

don't want to tell the truth about our bank accounts, about our efforts about

where we spend our time. Someone says to me, I don't have time to do this, or I

want so badly to start this business or to change my life. I just asked them

one question. I said, Well, bring me your calendar and your bank account, and

we'll see what's important to you. Because that's the truth. where you put your

money and where you put your time is what's important. And if you know you, we

can tell ourselves and we do tell ourselves all kinds of stories, blame the

weather, blame government, blame God, blame the economy, blame our childhood,

blame everything else. And that's fine, and you're allowed to do that. But the

consequences of living that way means you'll never get off of ground zero. So

if you want to get past that blaming place, it starts with telling the truth.

And the truth may include whatever somebody else did, okay, that's true, too.

The next piece of truth is, like I said, at the beginning, my mom did whatever

she did, the thing I took away from that is I'm not good enough. And I let that

principle rule my life until I stopped. And there is a point in our lives where

we say I, I am at cause here, I get to take responsibility, I might need help,

I might need to go see a shrink, I might need to go see a doctor, I got a dog

downstairs, I was doctoring just before we got on this call, and that dog

didn't ask for this big growth that's in between her second and third toe on

her right foot. And so we're going to take her to the doctor to get that help.

I saw some a bunch of shrinks and tried different depression medications and

have tried all kinds of things. To adjust the chemistry in the body. The

chemistry is what it is. If I take responsibility to do something about it,

then I can go from not having interest in doing things. Not wanting to perform,

being afraid that I'll fail, which was a lot of people's stuff, too. I don't

care. I'm going to try it anyway. I'm going to add good to the world whether

anybody likes it or not. You know, that's my choice. And telling the truth is

the key. Like if I say why am I not moving toward my goal, whatever it is

happiness, money, wellness, what why am I not moving? I'm here. I tell this

funny story. Not telling the truth is like I am in Miami. Let's pretend I'm not

but let's pretend I'm in Miami. And I'm pretending I'm in Denver. And then I

say I want to go to New York. Well, if I pretend I'm in Denver, and I want to

go to New York, what's really going to happen is I'm going to drown out in the

Bermuda Triangle because I pretended I was in Denver. And so I went straight

East instead of North, like, not telling the truth means that we're going to

take the wrong action will talk to the wrong people, we won't get anything

done, right? Because we have pretended, by not telling the truth. We were

somewhere either financially, emotionally, spiritually, physically, that we're

not if I pretend I'm a great mountain climber, and I really am overweight and

can't move, and I go try to do a climb, I'm gonna die. Because I wouldn't tell

the truth about what I needed to get ready. Does that make sense?



Ed Watters 

35:44


That's

powerful. That's what we need right there. The second one desire.




Kellan Fluckiger  35:51


Okay. So

I think when, when God created us, you know, desire to do stuff is one of the

things he gave us each we, nobody, nobody, no one that I know, or I've ever

met, wants to do nothing. Like you created this podcast, you have an itch to

serve people, you want things to happen with this, you want it to reach out and

touch somebody, but you have a desire, people have a desire, sometimes that

desire is weird, like, I want to do dumb things, or I want to make so much

money, or I want to hurt somebody or whatever. But we have desires. And we have

to identify them, and then choose which ones we act on. And that one, accepting

the desires that we have, I want this and I want this, and I want this and I

want this, okay, there's four things I want. And I want to stay in bed all day.

Yeah, but I want to get up and do some podcast episodes. Today, which happens

to be on my agenda. I want to, you know, whatever, yeah, but I want to do this

more. And one of the mistakes we make is we we change the word want to into

gotta or have to, I have to do this, and I have to do that. You don't have to

do anything. What you need to do is identify the true desires that you have and

follow them. That may be true that if you choose not to make money, you can't

pay your rent, and so you'll be on the street, okay. But nobody says you have

to make money. I want to do that worse than I want the consequences of not. And

someone may think that's trivial, but changing our language, to owning which is

part of that truth, to owning our true desire. And labeling it what it is,

instead of what it isn't, is a powerful way to harness those desires. To first

identify, and then create what you want in your life.



Ed Watters 

37:55


And the

third one we're going to talk about is imagination.




Kellan Fluckiger  37:59


Cool

imagination. Every kid in the world is born with imagination. You know, when I

was a kid my brother and I used to play all kinds of stuff in bed at night in

bunk beds. And we played and played and played and we couldn't see each other

and it was dark. And our imaginations filled in the blanks. And we're full of

texture and rhythmic richness. And we had whole worlds and empires and you know

all kinds of stuff that we did without any props or anything just with the

language and imagination. And one of the things that I teach in the Results

Equation is you can't create what you can't imagine. So one of the things that

the key or a key to creating your ultimate life is to have a picture of what

that really is. That's why in the podcast, I gave a definition. Somebody may

disagree with that definition. But my definition is that life of purpose,

prosperity, and joy you create by serving others with your divine gifts. And so

when I say ultimate life, I have a clear picture of that. That means purpose. I

wake up every day, excited and I can imagine myself and therefore I created

imagination is the first step of creation. I get up every day excited today

included minus 30 outside, I got up today excited, wanting to do things. And

that purpose is what drives me. prosperity. I use that word on purpose. A lot

of people think of money, but money is only one small piece of prosperity.

Anybody that's been through trials and tribulations, knows health,

relationships, all that stuff easily Trumps money and joy is something again

that you you choose and your imagination is the key. Like I see myself prosper.

I see myself with purpose. I see myself on fire and with joy. My wife happens

to be named Joy. That woman who was given to me in that divine direction or you

know told me to go essentially propose to her personally, and all of that kind

of thing, word choices, and I imagine those things. And having a rich and textured

and deep imagination, with details and excitement and feelings is the key to

creation because it fires your drive. It fires that desire to make it real, and

it's powerful when you want to overcome stuff.



Ed Watters 

40:24


The next

one is big. It's optimism.




Kellan Fluckiger  40:29


You

know, there's a doctor named Dr. Martin Seligman, who did a 20-year study about

optimism. I think he wrote a book called Learned Optimism. And some people call

optimists stupid Pollyanna or not realistic view of the world. And pessimism

is a mark of sophistication. That doctor after a 20-year study of optimism, and

pessimism and its consequences in both the boardroom and the bedroom and on the

playing field and everywhere else, high powered people. He said pessimism may

be the mark of sophistication. But it is a costly one because his study showed

without question over 20 years, people who choose to be optimistic, we'll talk

about that in a minute. People who choose to be optimistic make more money than

similarly talented people who choose not to be they do better in relationships,

they're happier, and they live several years longer. So they do better in all

measurable areas of life, to someone who's exactly as talented has exactly the

same breaks and opportunities as someone who chooses a pessimistic view. Now,

there are some reasons for that. There's absolute scientific reasons. When I'm

pessimistic, my body is filled with a neurochemical cocktail. And that neurochemical cocktail narrows our creativity reduces our option, our ability to see

options, it literally shrinks my world of influence and creativity. When I'm in

the same situation, and I choose to be optimistic, my creativity, index, and

measurable scores go up, my ability to perform goes up. My ability to do

difficult things goes up, my ability to solve puzzles goes up, make money goes

up. So measurably the chemistry in your body changes. When you're optimistic

and you're pessimistic. And optimism produces a chemistry in the body that is

creative, powerful, energetic, and attractive. People are attracted to light and

to optimism and that sort of thing. And optimism is not being silly. It's not

pretending there aren't problems. an optimist looks at a situation and says,

There's got to be a way to solve this. A pessimist looks at the same situation

and says crap, we're screwed. That's change, right there is the

difference. 



Ed Watters 

43:06


Yeah,

that's big optimism. We all need to incorporate it into our lives because we

have to see the good in the bad. And that's just part of life. The fifth and

final principle is perseverance.



Kellan Fluckiger  43:23


So

that's beautiful. And that's kind of obvious, but it ties into what you asked

about earlier, which is the sickness the near-death experience. Two and a half

years ago, in June of 2018, my wife and I decided to go on a cruise, and neither

one of us despite having made all kinds of money, I'd never been on a cruise I

just never was interested. So we decided to go on a cruise to the Baltic Sea

for 10 days, we went to St Petersburg and Helsinki and some other cities. And

it was fun and we had a good time. Toward the end of that, I got sick in the

last day in Amsterdam before we flew home. I got sick and I had a fever that

was so bad I I could hardly move. I barely got on the plane to get home and had

cold and hot sweats all the way home and it was a 14 hour, 14-hour flight over

the pole from because Edmonton is in Canada. So we fly over the pole anyway

from Amsterdam to Edmonton. When I got home, I went straight home. It's bad.

And that was the second day of being sick Monday all day was sick Tuesday all

day. Wednesday, the fever let up a little bit but I was still really sick.

Thursday was bad. And Friday, I finally decided I better go into the walk in

clinic, which is what they have here in Canada before you go, you know, like a

hospital or something. So I went to our walk-in clinic and this is the fifth

day of illness around noon or one o'clock or something. They had a sign in the

clinic that said if you've got a cough or a fever or something tell the

attendant. Well I was extremely ill and I knew it plus Joy and I asked her to

ask the nurse to come out to see if they were going to let you know if I should

come in, it said warning. So I did. She took one look at me, like literally one

look, and said, You can't even come in you go to the hospital. Right now,

there's nothing we can do to you go to emergency. So I did and got there, you

know, in the afternoon. And it's funny because in most emergency rooms, you know,

you might wait anywhere from one to five hours depending on how many people are

there, what time of day it is everything else. So I said, I expected to sit

there for a couple of hours. And I huddled over in the corner sick as a dog.

And I must, I must have really looked bad because, in 10 minutes, I was in a

private room, not in the hospital, but in the ER area. And so anyway, it got

worse from there. And the doctor asked me all these questions and asked Joy all

these questions and came back and he said, Well, at a minimum, you have an

extremely bad pneumonia in both lungs, but something else is wrong. And we

don't know what it is yet. So right. I waited another couple of hours. And I

started feeling something really strange. And so this was about five or six or

seven o'clock at night and I sent Joy home, I said, I don't know how long I'm

going to sit here I'll call you when there's something and I started to

meditate in my just to go inside of myself to see what was going on. And I

could feel my body separating from my spirit, I could feel a sense of

separation. And so I I came out of my meditation and I sent a text to Joy. By

now it was 10 o'clock or something. And or 11 and she'd gone to bed. So she

didn't see it. But I, the doctor had come back and said, we're going to have to

put you in the ICU. And we're also going to probably put you in isolation,

biological isolation because we don't know what's wrong with you. So I sent

her a text and I said, I see in three lines I see you. And oh, the doctor then

came back another time after a few minutes and asked me the question you never

want to hear. He said, do we have permission to intubate you or do whatever we

need to do to preserve your life? And I sat there stunned looking at the doctor

thinking, holy crap, this is bad. And I said, Okay, so then they left, and they

were looking for making an ICU bed in isolation, all this stuff ready. So I

sent Joy the text and it said, I see you second line said isolation slash

intubation. And the third line said I may be dying because of what I felt, and

she didn't see that. About an hour later, I was in a coma. I was gone. So they

stuck me in ICU, they stuffed me full of tubes and on a ventilator and all that

kind of stuff. With no idea of what was wrong with me because they knew I was

dying. About one or two o'clock. They called Joy and she got the call you never

want to get from the hospital. The nurse said to her, are you coming? She said,

What are you talking about? And then she saw my text, right. And so it was

quite a panic. And I was gone for the next two and a half to three weeks. I

think it was 17,18 days, I don't know, in a coma. And for the first several

days, they had no idea what I had. And so they just like I was all geared up

and intubated and everything and they were filling me full of every high tech

antibiotic known to man, and also doing every test they could do to figure out

what I had. Turns out what I had was Prostatic MRSA, which is a superbug in

both lungs. And it was literally killing me. They told me later, that the

strain that I had had a 10-day mortality rate of 100%. It's funny, we talked

about mortality rate with COVID. We talked about two and a half to 3%. My

mortality rate was 100%. If you're not in a hospital, and it dropped to only

60% if you were in the hospital. Well, I got to the hospital at the end of day

five. And during that time, I was in a coma and that's when I had the near-death experience and three distinct individual conversations with God at the

door literally a doorway between life and eternity. And I wrote about those in

a another book called Meeting God At The Door conversations choices and

commitments of a near-death experience. That experience and after three weeks I

came out of it. And I didn't I didn't die because I chose not to the first of

the conversations was a simple question. It was funny because I I came to in my

spirit came to my body was dying over there. But my spirit came to and I was in

a great room and I was horizontal like I wasn't dead. But I could see over there

a door and it was a regular doorway and didn't have a door but it was a jamb.

On the other side. It was light and the light wasn't streaming through but it

was just light quite on the other side. And I wanted to be at the door and so

then I was at the door and I was leaning on the door jamb on my side, and there

was another person on the other side all white, leaning against the door jamb

on the other side. So we were having a casual conversation. And there was no

question where I was, like, what the door was and who that was, and who I was,

like, that was really clear. And the first conversation was one question, Do

you want to come home? And it hit me like a ton of bricks because I knew what

the question meant. And I knew where the door was. And I knew what was going

on. And then I started thinking about all the things that I was trying to do

and committed to do. And that because by then, that was only two and a half

years ago. So I my business is well underway. And I'm trying to help these

people and everything else. And I thought it through and the answer was I'm not

ready, and it took a lot longer than that it was a lot longer conversation. But

the answer was, I'm not ready. I got stuff to do. And so that was the first

conversation. And then the next day, there was another one. And the next day,

there was another one. And we probably don't have time for me to tell all those

but they're in the book, Meeting God At The Door. So that was a near-death

experience. And I came to and how this has to do with perseverance is when I

got out of the hospital after a month, I'd lost 35 pounds when I was completely

flatlined physically, I looked like a survivor from a concentration camp. And I

could barely, I couldn't walk I could crawl, barely. I've been pretty physically

fit most of my life and second-degree black belt, a couple of martial arts, and

I've always sort of measured my fitness in terms of how many pushups I can do,

right? Like there's never been a time in my life when I was overweight that I

couldn't hit the floor and do forty. I tried about the third or fourth day I

was home to do something and I laid down on the floor and I couldn't get my

nose out of the carpet or remember the carpet hairs. tickling my nose. Right, I

couldn't get up. So the perseverance part is, okay, this is a long road back, I

am completely flatlined. And so for the last two and a half years, that's been

part of my project, which is to get myself back into physical shape and to get

my body back because I was allowed to say and to have a purpose and mission,

and nothing is happened except that it's been strengthened. And I've been able

to do that with perseverance. And so that is a story to give the example both

about the near-death and perseverance. You can do anything you want with no

quit. If I aim in a direction and I keep walking, I'll eventually get there, no

matter what. There's no stopping you, or anyone from getting where you want to

go. simply a question of going through the valley of death, or the mountain of

madness, or whatever it is you got to walk through to get where you want to go.

And you're giving up is always an option. But if you want to get where you want

to go create the life that you have envisioned that you have imagined, that you

want really badly. Perseverance is required.



Ed Watters 

53:06


That's

powerful testimony. Now I want to be respectful of time here. I do have one

other question for you. You've written a lot of books. Are they going to come

out on audiobook?



Kellan Fluckiger  53:22


Yes, I

love narrating and I haven't done any yet. I have a good narration voice and

I'm going to narrate them myself. I say yes without hesitation because it's on

the list of things to do. And they're not done yet. But I will be doing all of

them in that way.



Ed Watters 

53:42


I cannot

wait for that. Because I'm a I'm an audio kind of guy. How can people get ahold

of you? Get involved with what you're doing and connect with you?




Kellan Fluckiger  53:54


My email

is my name coach Kellanfluckiger@gmail.com. And yeah, you'll have to look up

the show notes to figure out how to spell the name. Coach Kellan

fluckiger@gmail.com. That's easy. The other way is, friend me on Facebook and

send me a message. I regularly use Facebook messenger to talk to people and

answer questions. And, you know, I intentionally keep my friends below 4000

instead of five so that I have plenty of room for people that want to chat and

get acquainted and do whatever. I'm always available to have chat conversations

with people. I have a website www.kellanfluckiger.com And again, I'll spell it

right on there you'll see places to get you know books and I have some courses.

One is how to create time, or creating time for joy and productivity. One is

how to manage or create money, one is four steps to awesome client creation. I

have like a dozen courses that are not all up there yet. Some of them are. I'm

in the process of creating the others that are all founded on the idea that you

can have anything you want if you're willing to take the steps and take the

action, so Facebook, I have a YouTube channel called Ultimate Life Formula. But

any direct connection, my email, and Facebook Messenger would probably be the

easiest.



Ed Watters 

55:18


Very

powerful person Kellan Fluckiger here. Get involved with him, look him up. All

the links are in the show notes. Kellan thank you for joining us today. You

have an awesome afternoon.



Kellan Fluckiger  55:31


 Thank you. Thanks for having me. Thanks for

your questions. And I hope that your listeners find some value and the

encouragement in what we've talked about.




Ed Watters 

55:44


Thank

you for joining us today. If you found this podcast, enlightening,

entertaining, educational in any way. Please Share, Like, subscribe, and join

us right back here next week for another great episode of Dead America podcast.

I'm Ed Watters your host, enjoy your afternoon wherever you may be.