Artwork for podcast The Big Drink Rethink
Ep 132: Why Doesn't Summer Feel Like a Break? | Rethinking Alcohol |
Episode 13216th July 2026 • The Big Drink Rethink • Anna Donaghey
00:00:00 00:17:02

Share Episode

Shownotes

Summer is supposed to be the easy season, so why does it so often leave us more tired, pressured, and frazzled than ever? In this solo episode, Anna Donaghey unpacks the myth of the "restful summer" and the invisible standards that pile up as the weather warms: be the memory-maker, the joy-creator, the calm presence. It's a pressure that fuels depletion and quietly drives the urge for an evening drink, not for pleasure, but as an off-switch when rest feels out of reach.

Drawing on psychologist Donald Winnicott's idea of the "good enough" parent, Anna reframes what it means to do summer well, and shares practical questions to help you carve out genuine breaks, lower the pressure, and gently move away from alcohol as your only way to switch off.

If your summer doesn't feel like the break you were promised, this episode will show you you're not alone and point you toward a kinder, more sustainable way through.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Intro: Why can summers be exhausting

01:20 The real summer vs. the Instagram version

03:20 Family life: chaos of young kids or grownup kids at home

05:07 The “gap” between summer’s promise and reality

05:26 Feeling the pressure to make memories

06:03 Why we feel guilty when we finally get a break

06:31 Evenings as the first off-switch and how that cues drinking

08:03 Introducing Winnicott’s “good enough” concept

09:52 Chasing the perfect summer sets up the craving for relief

10:14 Good enough is actually enough

11:27 Once you lower the bar, the craving (and pressure) loosens

12:32 What your evening self actually needs

13:47 What would actually make summer feel like a break for you?

14:39 Specific examples for reclaiming space and calm

15:47 “Good enough” as the true standard, not a consolation prize

16:07 The real summer is messy (and that’s enough)

Anna’s book "What Are You Thirsty For? Rethinking Alcohol and The Life You Want", is now out in the world for you to buy!

Order your copy, access her free tools and explore her coaching programmes at: https://thebigdrinkrethink.com/

The Thirsty For More Mindset Lab is Anna’s ‘inner circle’ - a calm, thoughtful space where conversations continue, patterns are explored, and things begin to make sense. Find out more at: https://thirstyformore.substack.com/

If you appreciate the podcast and would like to show a bit of love, you can donate the cost of a coffee here. It helps support the time and care that goes into making the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/bigdrinkrethink

About the host Anna:

Anna is a certified Alcohol Mindset Coach, trained by Annie Grace of This Naked Mind. Drawing on her own journey out of alcohol addiction, she now helps others explore and control their drinking. With a career spanning 25 years as a Strategist in the Advertising industry, she combines her own lived experiences, with great insight into what makes us tick and what influences us to behave the way we do.

Connect with Anna:

Website: thebigdrinkrethink.com

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annadonaghey

Instagram: instagram.com/bigdrinkrethink

Produced by winteraudio.co.uk

Links

Chapters

Video

More from YouTube

More Episodes
132. Ep 132: Why Doesn't Summer Feel Like a Break? | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:17:02
131. Ep 131: Q&A: I'm Drinking Less on Mounjaro. This Is Good News, Right? | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:13:03
130. Ep 130: What Your Holiday Is Telling You | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:51:59
129. Ep 129: What Does Curiosity Look Like This Summer? | Alcohol Coaching
00:26:55
128. Ep 128: Rewriting the Summer Drinking Script | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:43:45
127. Ep 127: Same Feeling, Different Fix: Co-dependency Explained | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:58:08
126. bonus Ep 126: BONUS EPISODE: The Version Of You On The Other Side with the Gavin Sisters | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:31:48
125. Ep 125: Breaking The 'Wine O'clock' Habit | Alcohol Coaching |
00:25:02
124. Ep 124: Wired, Tired, and Reaching for Wine | Rethinking Alcohol and Your Nervous System
00:48:57
123. Ep 123: How Big Is Your World? | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:20:27
122. Ep 122: Building a Life You Don't Want to Escape From | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:45:16
121. Ep 121: Toolkit '101' - How to Party Without Alcohol
00:28:37
120. Ep 120: The Shortcut To Belonging | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:53:57
119. Ep 119: The Act of Showing Up | Alcohol Coaching
00:35:17
118. Ep 118: When Avoidance Stops Working with April Day Garcia | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:55:42
117. Ep 117: The Art of Avoidance: Why Alcohol Works…Until it Doesn’t
00:16:59
116. Ep 116: Tiny Clarity Moments 2 | Alcohol Coaching |
00:16:29
115. Ep 115: When Alcohol Is the Backdrop
00:47:31
114. Ep 114: Who Am I If I Don't Drink? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:21:41
113. Ep 113: The Courage To Become Someone New with Andrew Drasen | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:41:40
112. Ep 112: Rethinking Alcohol: We Are Not Our Past
00:14:19
111. Ep 111: Brilliant on Paper. Struggling in Real Life | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:50:41
110. Ep 110: Toolkit ‘101’: What One Intentional Alcohol-Free Day Can Look Like
00:34:45
109. Ep 109: Starting Again at Any Age | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:49:37
108. Ep 108: Tiny Clarity Moments | Alcohol Coaching |
00:15:09
107. Ep 107: What if Drinking Isn’t the Issue? | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:09:36
106. Ep 106: Dopamine Nation: Alcohol, Pleasure & Rebuilding Joy
00:46:05
105. Ep 105: What if You’re Not The Problem? | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:10:42
104. Ep 104: My Book ‘What are You Thirsty For?’ Is OUT NOW! | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:17:19
103. Ep 103: 5 Ideas to Make This Month Easier | Alcohol Coaching |
00:15:55
102. Ep 102: The Secret to Handling Cravings | Alcohol Coaching |
00:10:29
101. Ep 101: Before You Start Dry January, Listen to This | Alcohol Coaching |
00:11:56
100. Ep 100: Your Christmas Day Pep Talk | Alcohol Coaching |
00:07:27
99. Ep 99: Your Christmas Survival Guide - Navigating the Dynamics & Triggers | Alcohol Coaching |
00:36:55
98. Ep 98: How to Survive and Actually Enjoy Christmas Parties | Alcohol Coaching |
00:33:50
97. Ep 97: Toolkit 101 – A Brilliant Tool to Help You Outgrow Alcohol
00:28:53
96. Ep 96: How Quitting Alcohol Made Space for Meaning with Dan D’Souza
00:53:00
95. Ep 95: Q&A - Why Can't I Just Let Go...Without Alcohol
00:26:53
94. Ep 94. Alcohol, Trauma & The Search for Safety with Dr. Evette Rose
00:53:56
93. Ep 93. Alcohol, Shame & The Art of Release with Emma Lyons
00:52:16
92. Ep 92. Alcohol, Change & The Power of Reinvention with Eleanor Tweddell
00:53:41
91. Ep 91. Alcohol, Fatherhood and the Courage to Change with Luke Jones
00:51:58
90. Ep 90. Alcohol, Resistance & The Art of Letting Go
00:22:13
89. Ep 89. Emotional Sobriety Explained | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:54:34
88. Ep 88. Family, Alcohol & The Power of Empathy
00:46:21
87. Ep 87. Toolkit ‘101: Simple Ways to Build Connection & Belonging | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:43:09
86. Ep 86. From Alcohol to Radical Integrity
00:54:55
85. Ep 85: Waking Up To What Matters | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:22:21
84. Ep 84: Series Refresh: Beyond Alcohol
00:20:19
83. Ep 83. Alcohol Rewind with Laura Bartlett
00:33:24
82. Ep 82. Alcohol Rewind with William Porter
00:44:11
81. Ep 81. Alcohol Rewind with Adrian Chiles
00:36:42
80. Ep 80. Simple Psychology for a Sober-Curious Summer | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:28:53
79. Ep 79: Toolkit ‘101’: Alcohol & Summer - 5 Ways to Stay in Control
00:33:20
78. Ep 78: Alcohol-Free Vibes: Summer Drinks, Culture & Connection with Chris Cardone
00:54:24
77. Ep 77: Summer Survival Guide: Rethinking Holidays, Hangovers & Having Fun
00:49:51
76. Ep 76. From Booze to Belief: Confidence Without Alcohol
00:48:44
75. Ep 75. Toolkit ‘101’: Triggered by the Sun - A Tool for Sunny Days | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:37:53
74. Ep 74: Alcohol: Nature, Nurture & What We Can Change
00:53:46
73. Ep 73: Q&A: When Alcohol Breaks Trust, How Do I Rebuild It?
00:32:42
72. Ep 72: Alcohol, Overwhelm & ' The Perfect Mother' Myth
00:52:12
71. Ep 71: Q&A: Staying Motivated When Alcohol-Free Becomes 'Normal'
00:31:07
70. Ep 70: From Booze to Benefits: Functional Drinks, Explained | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:52:41
69. Ep 69: Mummy Doesn't Need Wine | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:27:46
68. Ep 68. Toolkit '101': 5-Minute Resets: Go-To Alternatives to Alcohol
00:33:26
67. Ep 67: Less Wine, More Oxygen: Breathwork For The Doubtful Drinker | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:51:05
66. Ep 66: From Stress to Flow: Balance, Not Booze | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:50:34
65. Ep 65: Q&A: How Do I Not Drink When Other People Trigger Me? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:27:52
64. Ep 64: Midlife, Menopause & Alcohol: Letting Go of 'Perfect’
00:49:27
63. Ep 63: Toolkit 101 - How to Change Your Alcohol Stories
00:25:30
62. Ep 62: Our Alcohol Stories: Words that Can Change Your Life with Helen Packham
00:50:54
61. Ep 61: Q&A: Why do I Self-Sabotage my Sobriety? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:31:56
60. Ep 60: The Gendered World of Alcohol Marketing
00:49:55
59. Ep 59: Toolkit 101: Practical Ways to Build Positive Habits | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:38:57
58. Ep 58: Own Your Worth & Rewrite your Alcohol Story
00:50:32
57. Ep 57: Q&A: How do I Deal with Alcohol-Related Shame?
00:25:29
56. Ep 56: Alcohol, Shame & Healing: Karla’s Story
00:54:13
55. Ep 55: Toolkit 101 - Getting 'Unstuck!' | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:43:51
54. Ep 54: Breaking the Alcohol Cycle - Habits vs Dependency
00:50:05
53. Ep 53: Toolkit 101: Recapping on a Year of Free Tools | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:34:48
52. Ep 52: Q&A: When Will I Begin To Feel Better? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:31:45
51. Ep 51: The Hidden Costs of Alcohol - A Police Perspective
00:49:46
50. Ep 50: Toolkit '101': Progress over Perfection - A New Approach to Dry January | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:36:17
49. Ep 49: Alcohol-Free & Thriving: The Power of Positivity with the Gavin Sisters
00:55:23
48. Ep 48: Toolkit 101: Controlling Alcohol at Christmas (or other Big Occasions)
00:29:58
47. Ep 47: Q&A: How do I Cope with Really Low Moments? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:18:31
46. Ep 46: Forging a Sober & Strong Identity, with Millie Gooch | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:46:27
45. Ep 45: Q&A - My Partner Still Drinks and is Unsupportive | Alcohol Coaching |
00:20:13
44. Ep 44: Alcohol & Spiritual Growth, with Christy Osborne
00:45:44
43. Ep 43: Q&A: How Do I Cope with Setbacks? | Alcohol Coaching |
00:16:42
42. Ep 42: Alcohol & Menopause, with Lauren Chiren
00:45:56
41. Ep 41: Toolkit '101': How & Why to Journal | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:30:23
40. Ep 40: Q&A: How do I Deal with Discomfort on an Alcohol Break?
00:17:28
39. Ep 39: From Alcohol to Authenticity, with Clare Pooley
00:48:34
38. Ep 38: Toolkit ‘101’: Coping with Alcohol Cravings and Urges
00:27:31
37. Ep 37: Q&A: Will I Stop Missing the Alcohol High?
00:13:58
36. Ep 36: Breaking Down Silos in Alcohol Culture, with Denise Hamilton-Mace
00:48:45
35. Ep 35: Q&A: Is Moderating Alcohol Possible?
00:18:59
34. Ep 34: Alcohol & Health: Its Journey through the Body
00:57:01
33. Ep 33: Alcohol Advertising: It's Time for a Rethink
00:32:26
32. Ep 32: Toolkit '101' - Principles For a Successful Alcohol-Free Break
00:25:10
31. Ep 31: From Grey Area Drinking to Holistic Health with Janey Lee Grace | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:57:26
30. Ep 30: Sobriety Milestones, with Sober Dave | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:56:52
29. Ep 29: Toolkit '101' - Our Toolkit So Far | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:19:52
28. Ep 28: The Big Drink Rethink - The Need & The Story So Far… | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:20:55
27. Ep 27: Conscious Consumption: Choosing Alcohol-free & Planet-Friendly
00:46:05
26. Ep 26: Toolkit ‘101’: 20 Tips for Alcohol Moderation
00:35:32
25. Ep 25: The Hidden Drivers of Behaviour and Addiction | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:51:09
24. Ep 24: Addressing the Alcohol Middle Ground with Russell Lamb
00:42:51
23. Ep 23: Toolkit '101': Measuring Your Personal Happiness | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:36:36
22. Ep 22: Overcoming Addiction and Redefining Masculinity with Alex Clapp | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:48:29
21. Ep 21: Key Drivers of Happiness and the Influence of Alcohol
00:50:02
20. Ep 20: Toolkit '101': Mindful Mastery: The Science & the Know-how | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:27:06
19. Ep 19: Alcohol-Free Peace: Self-Love, ADHD & Perimenopause
00:48:35
18. Ep 18: Beyond the Bottle: Nick Elston on Mental Health | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:52:27
17. Ep 17: Toolkit '101': Overcoming the Fear of Change | Alcohol Coaching |
00:29:36
16. Ep 16: When Drinking is part of your Identity with Sober Dave | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:57:23
15. Ep 15: Exploring Alcohol and Family: The Power of Storytelling
00:50:05
14. Ep 14: Alcohol & Parenting: Talking to Teens with Anita Cleare
00:53:15
13. Ep 13: Toolkit ‘101’: Managing Peer Pressure | Alcohol Coaching |
00:32:49
12. Ep 12: Crafting a New Drinking Narrative with Laura Willoughby | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:55:28
11. Ep 11: Let’s Talk about Alcohol at Work with Tabbin Almond
00:52:29
10. Ep 10: Toolkit '101': Tools to Manage Habitual Evening Drinking | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:37:08
9. Ep 09: The Truth About Alcohol & Sleep
00:49:29
8. Ep 08: Why Alcohol-Free Spirits are Good Value
00:53:52
7. Ep 07: Toolkit '101': Taking Charge | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:35:00
6. Ep 06: Raising the Bar Without Alcohol with Laura Bartlett
00:48:19
5. Ep 05: The Nation's Favourite Coping Mechanism – Explained! | Rethinking Alcohol |
01:05:36
4. Ep 04: Toolkit '101': Mindful drinking basics | Alcohol Toolkit |
00:29:27
1. Ep 01: What The Big Drink Rethink is All About | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:33:48
3. Ep 03: Why Less is More with Adrian Chiles | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:42:11
2. Ep 02: Exploring our Love Affair with Alcohol with Professor David Nutt
00:53:45
trailer The Big Drink Rethink Podcast Trailer | Rethinking Alcohol |
00:00:43