Overthinking is one of the biggest confidence killers, and most women don’t struggle because they don’t know what to do.

They struggle because they stopped trusting themselves to choose.

In this episode, Yaya breaks down:

• why overthinking becomes your default

• how fear, past failures, and perfectionism mess with your clarity

• the 3-step formula for making decisions without spiraling

• how to stop handing your power to other people

• how to rebuild trust the same way you heal after a heartbreak

You’re not confused.

You’re not “bad at decisions.”

You’ve just forgotten how to hear yourself over the noise.

By the end of this note, you’ll feel grounded, clear, and ready to choose your next step with confidence.

If you’re ready to rebuild that self-trust on a deeper level, apply for 1:1 in Journey to Confidence.

Hey, girl.

Hey.

Welcome back to Notes to Her, the daily pep talk.

I'm Yaya, your confidence and mindset coach, here to help you stop second guessing yourself and start trusting the woman in the mirror again.

In the last note, we talked about the tiny habits that hold you back, the little things that you do on autopilot that quietly drain your confidence.

But what happens after that?

What happens if the habits change but the doubt is still loud?

Well, today's note is for the indecisive woman who asks everyone else what she should do.

For the girl who overthinks her own intuition.

For the woman who keeps people at distance.

Because letting someone in feels risky.

And.

And honestly, trusting herself feels risky, too.

If that's you, take a breath.

This one's for you.

Have you ever found yourself double checking every choice?

Like you can't make a move without someone else's approval?

You're not alone.

Because a lot of women stop trusting themselves after failure.

Maybe you started the wrong business, stayed too long in the wrong job, ignored red flags in a relationship, or gave someone a second, third, and maybe even a fourth chance that they did not deserve.

And ever since that moment, your confidence felt cracked.

So every new choice feels heavier, like proof that maybe you're not good at choosing after all.

But confidence and decision making doesn't come from getting everything right.

It comes from being willing to trust yourself again, even if you're scared to.

When you made that decision that hurt, especially the one that costs you time, money, or your peace.

Your brain links deciding with danger.

So it starts whispering things like, don't mess it up this time.

Ask someone else first.

Or wait until you're 100% sure.

And just like that, you've handed your power away to fear, to perfectionism, to the illusion that someone else knows better than you.

But here's what I want you to remember.

You've made good decisions before.

You've survived hard ones.

And even the wrong ones taught you something that the safe path never could.

You didn't lose your ability to choose.

You just stopped giving yourself credit for surviving your choices.

Let me walk you through this formula that I use with my clients.

The confident decision formula.

Step 1.

Get clear on what you value, not just what you want.

So most overthinking comes from chasing other people's values, not your own.

Before you make a decision, ask what matters to me most right now?

Is it peace?

Growth?

Security?

Freedom?

Stability?

Creativity?

When your values are loud, people pleasing gets quiet.

Because clarity makes it easier for you to choose.

You instead of choosing Comfort for everyone else.

Step two, choose once and commit for 24 hours.

You don't need the whole plan.

You just need one decision to commit to for one day.

No spiraling, no backtracking, no texting three friends just to make sure.

Say the thing.

I'm launching this.

I'm applying.

I'm resting.

I'm done chasing this.

And hold that decision for 24 hours.

Your intuition gets stronger when you actually listen to it.

And step three, Give every outcome meaning, not judgment.

If it works out well, great.

Celebrate it.

If it doesn't, don't call it a failure, call it feedback.

Confidence is not.

I always choose right.

Because you're human.

Mistakes will be made.

Failures will happen.

Confidence is.

Even when I don't choose right, I know I'll recover.

That's the muscle.

That's the resilience.

That's the real confidence.

The ability to bounce back or keep going.

Now, I had a client who overthought everything.

She would ask five people for advice and still ignore her gut.

Before we worked together, she believed confidence meant certainty.

Like she had to be 100% sure before she moved, which really kept her stuck.

But after we started working together, she realized the peace that she was looking for didn't come from being right.

She learned that peace came from knowing that she could handle whatever happened next.

It's how we treat heartbreak, too.

You know, when your heart breaks, you swear that you are never going to love again.

You cry, isolate, shut down, crash out.

But over time, you open back up.

Trust rebuilds in layers.

And the same way that you survived heartbreak, you survived bad decisions too.

So next time you're in a crossroads, ask yourself, what would the most confident version of me choose?

And what if I trusted her this time?

You already have everything you need to make strong, aligned decisions.

You don't need more advice.

You need more trust.

So next time you catch yourself overthinking, come back to this formula.

Value, choose, Commit.

Learn.

And if you want help rebuilding that trust, the kind that doesn't crumble after a setback, I encourage you to apply for my one to one coaching program, Journey to Confidence.

It's where I help women like you stop second guessing and start leading their lives with clarity again.

You've been right about you all along.

It's time to believe it again.

So next time, we're going to be fully stepping into power.

With note 14, step into her.

The future you who's already winning.

You've done the work.

Now it's time to live it.

Sam.