You earned your seat. So why are you still standing at the door?

This episode is for the woman who just got the invite, the opportunity, the meeting, the room full of people with bigger titles, and instead of walking in with confidence, she's second-guessing whether she belongs there at all. Yaya gets into why that voice isn't wisdom, it's fear. And she shares a personal story from her corporate days that proves the point.

Inside this episode:

• Why "do I belong here?" is a defense mechanism, not a reasonable question

• The real reason imposter syndrome shows up when things are going well

• What actually got you the invite (hint: it wasn't luck)

• What the room loses when you shrink in it

• Three practical shifts to walk in like you were made for it

Share this one with a woman who needs the reminder. She knows who she is.

Looking for additional resources? Start with the Confidence Kit, your go-to for breaking the spiral, rebuilding self-trust, and moving forward with clarity. 🔗 Link

If you're ready to stop figuring this out alone? Apply to work with me here.

If this episode spoke to you and you want to connect with me directly, you can reach out to me on Instagram @coachingwithyaya.

Follow the podcast account and share it with a friend or tag us on Instagram @notestoher.daily.

And don’t forget to subscribe to Notes to Her so you don’t miss the next pep talk.

Hey, girl.

Hey.

Welcome back to Notes to her, the daily pep talk.

I'm Yaya, your confidence and mindset coach, here to remind you that you belong in every room, every opportunity, and every space you've been called into.

I've been thinking about something lately, and I need to talk to you about it because I keep seeing women getting the invite, getting the opportunity, getting the seat at the table.

And instead of celebrating, she's standing outside the door asking herself, wait, should I actually be here?

And if that's ever been you, stay with me.

Because the answer is yes.

And I want to tell you exactly why.

Then let me tell you a story.

So, in my corporate career, towards the end of it, actually, I got invited to a meeting.

And not just any meeting.

We're talking executives, directors, people with titles that would make you straighten up when they walked in the room.

And then there was me.

I was junior level compared to them.

And I was in a room full of women that outranked me in every which way.

I remember when the invite first came through my calendar and my first thought wasn't excitement.

It wasn't, let's go.

It was more like, why am I here?

Do I even need to be there?

Is this a mistake?

I almost talk myself out of the room before I even walked in.

But here's what I had to remind myself and what I need you to hear right now.

I wasn't in that room by accident.

My stakeholder needed my expertise, my knowledge on specific projects, my insight.

They didn't invite my title.

They invited me.

And, sis, the same is true for you.

Okay, so let's be honest about what that question do I really belong here?

Is really doing.

Because it sounds like a relatable question.

It sounds like self awareness, like humility, like being responsible.

But most of the time, it's not a question.

It's a defense mechanism.

It's your nervous system trying to protect you from potential embarrassment, from judgment, from being found out, from taking up space and having someone decide you don't deserve it.

It's impostor syndrome.

Dressed up in a blazer, sitting right next to you, whispering, you don't really belong here.

And imposter syndrome is sneaky because it doesn't show up when things are going badly.

It shows up when things are going well.

When you get the promotion, when the opportunity lands in your lap, when you're chosen, that's when the voice gets louder.

Was his.

Look, they're gonna figure out I don't know as much as they think, what if I say the wrong thing.

That voice is not wisdom.

That voice is fear.

Wearing a very convincing costume, and you don't have to listen to it.

Let me tell you what actually got you here.

Not luck.

Not someone feeling sorry for you.

Not a fluke or a favor or a one time exception.

It was your skills.

Your work ethic.

The hours you've been putting in when nobody was watching.

The preparation, the dedication, the showing up even when it was hard.

The expertise you build.

Sometimes even without even realizing that you're building it.

Someone saw that and they extended the invitation.

You didn't stumble into the room.

You earned your way into it.

You have worked hard, learned too much, and come too far.

To stand outside a door that was open for you and question whether you deserve to walk through it.

The woman who invited you to the table, she wasn't confused.

The person who gave you the opportunity, they weren't making a mistake.

They chose you because of who you are and what you bring.

The only one second guessing it is you.

Now, here's what nobody really talks about.

But you know I am.

When you shrink into rooms that you were made for, you don't just hold yourself back.

You withhold something from the room.

Think about that meeting I told you about.

If I had let that voice win, if I had played small, stayed quiet, and decided my presence didn't matter, the stakeholder wouldn't have got the information that they needed.

The room wouldn't have had the right perspective that I brought in, and the people who needed my expertise wouldn't have had access to it.

Your presence in that room is not just about you.

It's about what you contribute.

When you show up fully, the ideas that you share will change.

The direction of the conversation.

The questions you ask that nobody else thought to ask.

The experience that fills up a gap that no one even knew existed.

When you shrink, the room loses.

And you lose.

You lose the opportunity to be seen, to grow.

To prove to yourself, not anyone else, that you can handle this.

Every time you walk into a room and show up fully, you build evidence.

Evidence that you belong.

Evidence that you can do this.

Evidence that you are that woman.

But you have to show up first.

Now, because I know some of you are in a room right now, literally or figuratively, and you're not sure that you should be there.

First, remind yourself of the receipts.

Not the doubts, not the fears, the receipts.

What do you know?

What have you done?

What have you built?

What have you figured out that nobody handed you?

That's evidence that you belong.

Second, change the question.

Instead of why am I here?

Ask, what can I contribute?

That shift moves you out of your head and into action.

From observer to participant, from questioning to contributing.

And third, give yourself permission to to not know everything.

You don't have to have all the answers to deserve a seat at the table.

You are invited for what you know, not for what you don't.

Even the most senior person in that room doesn't know everything.

That's why there are multiple people in the room.

So let yourself be one of them.

Walk in, sit down, contribute.

Because you were made to be in the room.

Now, imposter syndrome doesn't mean that you're unqualified.

Remember that.

It means that you care.

It means that you're growing.

It means that you have stepped into a level that's stretching you and that's exactly where you need to be.

The room did not call for someone who has it all figured out.

It called for you.

So this week, wherever you're being called, walk in like you belong there.

Because you do.

Stop waiting to feel ready.

Stop waiting for the doubt to disappear.

Stop minimizing the work and skill and excellence that got you the invitation in the first place.

You have always been that woman.

You're just finally walking into rooms that are starting to match it.

Share this with somebody today who needs to hear it.

And if it hit you, I would love for you to tag me at Notes to Her Daily.

I want to hear from you.

With love, Yaya.