Why do men pull away right when things start to feel real? I spent three weeks seeing a guy in Scottsdale who did everything right, until his kid walked in on us one morning and the whole thing went cold. On this week's The Summer of George I break down what happened, the text I'd been waiting for, and the tiger reel that told me everything I needed to know.
Here's what surprised me. Instead of spiraling, I realized I'm actually ready for something real. I caught myself wondering if my friends would like him, and if I could build something with him. That's new. And when he couldn't meet me on the one thing I don't budge on, communication, I didn't shrink myself to keep him around. I like me more than that.
Then I did what any woman back on the apps in her 40s does. I gave Hinge a whirl in Greece and matched with a guy who lied about his height and could barely speak English in person. I left in about thirty seconds. Because lying about your height is a red flag, and I don't owe a stranger a third glass of wine.
Happy Friday, everyone, and welcome back to the Scarlet Edit. I am your host, Nikki Corbett, and this is my bonus series, The Summer of George. I'm gonna be totally honest right now, this is my second time recording this, and I'm having to do it differently because my stupid iPhone will not connect to Riverside, and it is making me absolutely crazy. But the first time I recorded it, I decided to clip this little microphone to my shirt.
And what happened was it clanked against my necklace and it sounded like I was underwater. And I just couldn't put out something with that pour of quality because this week is a really great episode. So let's tell the story again. Now, I gotta say, last week I had fully intended to come on and
Tell a very honest story about what had been going on between me and the guy in Scottsdale that I had been seeing for the three weeks prior to me leaving for Greece. Now, I ended up being somewhat vague. And I mean, you know, like I've said, I've been a little bit vague on this the whole time because again, anyone that I've dated has not signed on to be a part of a podcast. but that being said, I did receive a text from him.
I believe it was either that morning. I don't know. I'm always confused because of the time difference, but I had received a text from him that make basically made me think like our communication was going to pick back up where it had been. Turns out I was wrong. So let's talk about what actually happened. And the reason why I want to share it is because I've learned so much by doing The Summer of George, and I will forever be grateful that I decided to do this.
and I feel like if I'm not sharing the real shit, like what's the point? Because maybe I learned something that could help one of you, or maybe you'll just get a good laugh, or maybe I'll learn something more by sitting here and yapping my brains out to you guys. So here we go. Okay, so as you guys know, I met him on Hinge and we had been very consistently seeing each other since the first time we went out.
I very much let him lead the relationship, meaning he was the one asking me out after every date. And I loved that. I mean, I personally love being in my feminine. I want to be pursued. And it feels good when you're interested. Felt good when I was interested in a man who was clearly interested in me back. it was also just nice in general to feel like.
We were both on the same page. Like there was truly no confusion. I said that a couple of weeks ago. So anyway, a few days before I left, I invited him over for dinner. We had so much fun. I made a really great meal. We were talking, laughing. Just he was being super honest with me. And the thing with him was that his actions backed up his words. Like I think we all know. I mean, come on. We've all been love-bombed. We've all
known what that feels like. but when the actions are backing up the words, and also he was not love bombing me. Like, and that was one thing that I really, really liked. Like I liked that he wasn't waking up in the morning and texting me like, morning sexy, or or hey, good night, hot stuff. Like, I I don't need that shit. Like it was just always intentional. It's like our texts were basically like making plans because we were seeing each other so often. So anyway, his actions backed up his words.
Until they didn't. So we had dinner at my house. It was great. He has a young dog. So he was like, I really want to spend the night with you, but I cannot leave this dog home alone. Will you and your dog come and spend the night? And I was like, you know what? Why not? My dog plays well with others. I wanted to stay the night with him. So I was just like, fuck it, let's go. So that's what happened. The next morning.
Now, regardless of what time I go to bed, I am wide awake by 6:30 a.m. So I was wide awake on my phone, whatever, just kind of getting my day started. He's still asleep. Around seven, I hear the garage door open and the door to the house open. So, long story short, he did not have his child that day. Well, he had forgotten something that he needed to take to school with him. So he had come over to get it.
He also decided to come upstairs because he wanted to say hi to his dad and his dog. So what does he do? What any kid does walks in the room and sees a strange woman in his father's bed.
Okay, so needless to say, the energy shifted a little bit when that happened. Not surprising at all. I'm also not going to comment on the situation itself, even though I certainly have my own thoughts, but I am not a parent. I would like to think that if I were going to show up at anybody's house at seven o'clock in the morning and I pulled up and there was clearly a woman's car in the driveway, I don't believe I would just walk in if.
I had not got the okay of my ex who was inside. I would like to think that that's how I would handle the situation. Unfortunately, that's not how the situation was handled. So again, not commenting on anyone's parenting, just commenting on the situation in general. Anyway, shortly thereafter, I went home. Like I said, the energy massively shifted. Did not hear from him at all that day.
The following day was very minimal. And then I was leaving early the next morning. He did take me to the airport. However, he showed up with sunglasses on and he did not take them off. And eye contact to me is a very, very big deal. And if you can't look me in the eyes, then there's definitely a problem. So anyway, off I came, and here I am. And I'm not gonna let anybody ruin my time in my favorite place in the world. So I was just like
Whatever is meant to be, you do you. I'm good. I did hear from him a little bit. wasn't very what I had hoped. And then right before I recorded last week's, I got the text that I had been waiting for. And it essentially said, I am not good at letting people in. What happened last week really threw me off guard. but nothing has changed about the way I feel about you.
I enjoy spending time with you and I want to continue to do so and I miss you. So as I was recording last week's episode, I thought to myself, great, we're gonna have a conversation, we'll see what he has to say, and ideally like get things back on track. Well, that's not what happened. I responded and have got very little response since.
I felt my response was very honest. I felt my my response was very vulnerable. Although my response did say, like, hey, I don't really think you're acknowledging that like this affected me too. And your kind of lack of talking to me has hurt my feelings. That's yet to be acknowledged. I received a reel of tigers, which they were basically it was basically like a sexual.
Tiger reel, which I'm still baffled by. and then I did get a text message the other day that I felt was very surface level, and it didn't warrant a response from me. So that's where we're at. how do I feel about it all? Well, disappointed, bummed. you know, I'm very aware that like we did not know each other for that long. You know, like three weeks is not a long time. It is definitely not enough time to get to know someone, and I know that, and I knew that.
What was crazy though is that it seemed like everything that was going on between us was very mutual. And that felt really good. So what I am choosing to do because of where I am in my life is I'm choosing to look at, okay, what are the positives that have come out of this? Number one, I think, and the most exciting one, is that dating him, I realized that I am actually ready for something real. Like I thought about, like, my God, like.
Maybe I could I feel like I could actually be with this guy. I feel like I could actually build something cool with this guy. And yes, again, acknowledging that three weeks is not enough time to get to know someone. But the fact that I was even having those feelings and wondering if I could weave him into my life somehow, that's really neat because that means that I'm actually ready to do that. And it's just like a matter of time and finding the right person. it made me feel good to, you know, let somebody in. It made me feel good.
To wonder, like, would my friends like this guy? Would my friends' husbands like this guy? I was talking to one of my girlfriends from high school and I was like, my God, like I could actually see him like having fun with your guy and our other friend's husband. And I just think that's a really cool place to be. I also, and equally as important, think that it's so great that I have boundaries that I have been able to enforce. Like I
I'm just like, okay, communication is number one for me. For me, communication has to be the foundation of any relationship that I get into. If we cannot communicate, if you, sir, cannot communicate with me, then it is not going to work. I don't care about anything else. So in understanding that and knowing that, like I can confidently say that to somebody. And if they can't do that, then I'm gonna have to say, like, okay, I can't do this then. I can't be in something where we can't communicate.
So that's pretty cool as well. just being able to say, like, hey, like, you need to acknowledge the way I feel. Like an old version of me might not have done that. An old version of me might have just been saying, like, okay, I'm gonna take whatever I can get here because I like this guy. No, I like me more. Like, and also watching someone's actions. For those first few weeks, like I was very much watching his actions, and his actions matched his words. His actions were actually above his words, which
was the best. But then it was like this 180. I feel like he did a 180. Like I literally was thinking the other day, I feel like someone came along, popped out his SD card, put in another one. And whoever's been communicating with me since I've been here is literally not somebody that I know. I'm like, I don't know who this version of this man is. I liked the one that I spent time with for three weeks. This version, I don't know him and I don't want to know him. So that's where it's at.
That's that's how this cookie crumbled, you know. And I don't know, what a bummer, but whatever. Like you gotta move on, right? Onward. So speaking of onward, my god. So I thought I would give a whirl to hinge here in Greece. Now I definitely knew going into it that.
A lot of times people can write English better than they can speak it. Like I did know that. that being said, I was hesitant but also curious. So I started chit chatting with this one guy. I thought he was attractive and he had really great English. Now I certainly didn't want to offend him and say, my God, your English is so good. You know.
Where did you learn? So I said instead I said, did you grow up speaking English and Greek? And he said, no, I grew up just speaking Greek, but I really made it a point to learn English really well because I think it's important. Okay, cool. And he goes on and on about how, like, well, you know, I'm local, so I want to show you local places. And I'm like, that's really cool. Like, sounds great. so we decide to meet up.
He suggests a place that I've never been, even though it is more in like a touristy area, but I was still like fine, like I don't care. It was close to where I'm staying. So I was like, let's make it easy. I walk up, he looks older than his photos, and he is significantly shorter than what his profile said. Now, look, height is something none of us can control. Like, none of us can control our height. Like we are what we are. However,
And I say this, especially if you're a man listening to this, if you're gonna go on a dating app, don't lie about your height because we're gonna know, because we're gonna meet you. And if you're gonna start off the relationship or potential relationship lying, like no thank you. It's a big fucking no thank you. And I'm sorry, if you're five ten, that does not mean you're six feet. If you're five nine, that does not mean you're six feet. If you're five eleven,
That does not mean you're six feet. So unless you are six feet, don't fucking say you're six feet. We're gonna know. my God. It's like just don't lie. Just tell me. I'm gonna meet you. Anyway, he also really didn't speak English. So that was like a big hard no. And I was seriously sitting there or standing there as we're walking into this restaurant, thinking to myself, I have had two glasses of wine. I do not want to sit and have a third.
While I am repeating myself or trying to use words that are so elementary that this man might understand. So thankfully, my friend Katie is my biggest ally. And I text her how frustrated I was, and she goes, Leave. You don't owe somebody anything, especially somebody who lied to you. I was like, you know what? I don't. So moments, literally, not even moments, seconds after we got sat, I said.
I need to use the restroom. I got up, I left, I unmatched him, I came back to my apartment. It was that simple. Now, some of you might say, my god, that's so rude. You should have just told him. no, it's fucking rude that he lied. So I don't owe him anything. So, anyway, that was my week. Aside from just being obsessed with the fact that I'm back in Greece, obsessed with the fact that I get to live this life and just
Being really happy about all that the summer of George has taught me because it has taught me so much. So we've got a few weeks left, and I am so excited to see how they unfold because I swear to God, every week brings something new. I'm not gonna lie. Every week something new happens, and I'm like, well, I couldn't have planned that if I had wanted to. So here we are. So as always, thank you guys so much for being here. Tune in next week on Thursday for your regularly scheduled The Scarlet.
edit episode and then come back on Friday for the summer of George because who knows what's gonna happen in the next seven days. I can't wait to find out. You guys are the best. See you next week. Bye.
