Amanda Paolicelli:
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What's up, Radiant icons and welcome back to Dare to Be
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Iconic, the podcast made for icons
who are daring to be themselves.
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I'm your host, Amanda Paolicelli, and for
today's Tea Time sesh, we are spilling
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the tea on how to find safety in your
body and how to reconnect with it.
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We are basically learning
how to live in our bodies.
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I do wanna note before we spill the
piping hot tea on this very subject
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manner that today's episode will be
mentioning PTSD, sexual assault and Sexual
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Violence, and intimate partner violence.
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I understand that these topics could
be triggering to some radiant icons out
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there who are listening to this episode.
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So please listen to this episode with
care and do what is right for you.
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If that means pausing this episode
and coming back to it later on your
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healing journey, or if that means
just pressing stop and never coming
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back to it, I want you to do what
is best for you in this moment.
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And so with that radiant icons, please
listen to this episode with care.
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Honestly, radiant icons.
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This episode is one that means so much
to me because of where I am currently
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in my life on my healing journey.
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As most of you know, back in February,
on February 4th, to be exact, I shared
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publicly for the first time ever that
when I was 18 years old, I was in a
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dating violence relationship, also known
as intimate partner violence that was
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specifically discussed in the episode, Hot
& Healing: How To Turn Your Pain Into Power.
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I know back then in that episode,
I said this is one of the scariest
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things I've ever had to do is to
share my truth about dating violence.
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Well, I think this one also is pretty,
pretty damn scary too for me as well.
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There are so many things that are
lumped into intimate partner violence,
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and for me, the type of violence that
I experienced was sexual violence.
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It's still hard to verbalize
at times the sexual trauma I
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experienced in that relationship,
especially with that relationship
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being my first relationship ever.
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Um, and this topic that we are spilling
the tea on today how to basically
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learn how to live in your body.
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I know a lot of sexual assault
survivors, sexual violence survivors
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deal with this specific topic.
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It's, it's really fucking hard, right?
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Like it's really fucking hard to learn
how to find safety in your body and
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reconnect with it and learn how to live
in it when your body, your home, 'cause
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I believe our bodies are our homes has
been violated on top of everything else
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that was violated in those situations
or in those relationships, right?
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Your body, your home, was also violated.
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And that has been something that I've
really been struggling with a lot.
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I.
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That's why I go to heels class.
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That's why I really focus on movement
because I really, really am determined
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this year to focus on reconnecting,
not only with myself and owning my
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truth, but reconnecting with my body
because my body was violated against my
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will by someone that I trusted, right?
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And so today's Tea Time Sesh is just
dedicated to everything I have learned
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in this journey of healing from intimate
partner violence and sexual violence.
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And this month is Sexual
Assault Awareness Month.
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For those of you who don't know, April
is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and
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I thought it was very fitting to not
only own my truth this month and have
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the courage to heal out loud about
this and say it, but to also share
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what I have learned on this journey
because I know that I am not alone.
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Are you ready, radiant icons?
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Because your tea time
sesh is starting now.
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I never thought that I would
share the story I'm about to share
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with you guys, because honestly,
I'm still a little embarrassed.
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And I still hold some shame,
but I shouldn't be shameful or
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embarrassed that I experienced
a flashback in a public place.
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I shouldn't hold shame for
someone else's actions that I
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now have to deal with, right?
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I, I shouldn't be feeling all these
emotions, but I did when I experienced a
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flashback the other day in my dance class.
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That has never happened to me before,
ever, because dance is my safe space.
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I mean, I talk about heels dance
all the time on this podcast.
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It's my one place where I really
have been able to reconnect with
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my body and own my sexy and just
be one with myself and learn how to
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live in it because it's really hard.
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I didn't think I was gonna cry.
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It's really hard to live in your body.
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After your body, your home
has been violated by someone
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you trusted in a relationship.
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It's so hard to live in your body when
all it's ever experienced is pain at
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the hands of someone that you trusted.
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You know, that really affects your mind.
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You know, it really affects your psyche.
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Some days, I don't know
how I face the world.
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I really don't, and I know
I'm not alone in this feeling.
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But damn, at times I just feel like the
flashbacks that I do experience or the
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intrusive thoughts of my abuse or of my
assaults are just gonna like run my life
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and in this particular instance with what
happened at my dance class, I felt so
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hopeless and not hopeful for my future.
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And so, I don't know.
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All I know is that I hope by sharing
this I can help someone else on their
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journey of reconnecting with their body.
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And so, we all know I
love my heels Wednesdays.
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It is the one thing in my
life that I am always looking
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forward to every single week.
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I love heels wednesdays, I
know you guys love heels.
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Wednesdays.
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It is honestly my
favorite part of the week.
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It is the one time week that is dedicated
not only for me time, but also for me to
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be realigned and reconnect with my body.
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It's where I find safety in it, because
I can do certain moves, I can experiment
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with these sexy vibes and own my sexy.
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I can just truly be free and be me.
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And the other day I was in the second
half of my two hour block for my heels
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classes and I was so excited because the
second block is always the one that is
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a little bit more challenging for me.
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The instructor lover to pieces, but
she kicks my ass every single week
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'cause I never know what to expect.
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And that is great because you never
wanna be stagnant as a dancer, but
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also as an individual, it really
pushes me outside of my comfort zone.
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And also it allows me
to turn my brain off.
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My brain is so busy with noise and being
in dance, but specifically that second
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block of dance allows me to truly leave
everything at the door and just dance.
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And you know, it was only the
first couple minutes into class and
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something was mentioned in a lyric.
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And you know, the lyrics in these
heels, dance songs, you know,
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they, they're sexually explicit.
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And usually it doesn't bother me.
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Like usually, you know, nothing comes up.
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I'm just like feeling myself in my body.
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But for some instance, it
triggered something for me.
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And when I say something,
I mean a flashback.
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I have PTSD from what I experienced in my
dating violence relationship like I do.
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That is something that I will
have for the rest of my life.
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And within PTSD, I get flashbacks.
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Some are stronger than others, and in
that case, I've never experienced before
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where my body actively kept going.
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So like I was actively trying
to learn the choreography while
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my mind was in the flashback.
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So my mind and my body were not aligned.
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They were not connected.
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I was not one because my mind was
back in the past and my body was
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in the present trying to survive.
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It was one of the most intense
experiences of my life.
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And progressively as we got through the
class, it just got harder and harder
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for me to survive, to get through it.
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I couldn't get the choreography because
my mind was somewhere else, right?
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And my body was not connected to my mind.
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So the moves weren't clicking.
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And so there's another added layer
of frustration because I'm currently
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actively in a flashback while I'm
trying to be in tuned and aligned
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with my body and reconnect to it.
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And you know, something happened
towards the middle of class and at
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this point I was like, you know what?
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Like I'm gonna be okay.
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Like even though I keep, keep getting
triggered and the thoughts are
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just keep on coming and the brain
is spinning, I'm gonna be okay.
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You're almost done, right?
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Something happened in the class that drew
attention to me, like all eyes on me.
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That made it a thousand times worse.
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And so I did it one more time 'cause she
called my group up to the front and I
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went to the front, did the damn thing,
and I could feel the tears forming in
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my eyes and I can feel my hands shake.
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And I was like, holy shit,
I need to get outta here.
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Like I need an exit plan.
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I, I can't do it.
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And so I made a beeline to my water.
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I saw my friend Mo and I said,
I'm fighting a flashback.
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And obviously they couldn't hear me
'cause there's music blaring because the
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second group was going on at this point.
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And so I typed it on my phone and I
flashed my phone to 'em and they were
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like, do you need to get out of here?
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I was like, absolutely.
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I've never walked faster out
of a dance class in my life.
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And I've never walked out of a dance
class before in my life until that
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exact moment because I couldn't, I
couldn't hold onto it any longer.
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I couldn't fight it off.
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I had to get.
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For my mental sanity and my mental
health, I had to get the hell out of
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there and do what was best for me.
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I didn't realize how much
trauma my body was held.
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I also didn't realize that we were
nearing a trauma-versary for me, I
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didn't realize that, which makes me more
susceptible to flashbacks or to intrusive
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thoughts or to whatever comes up for me.
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And it was just a horrible combination.
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And when we got outside and I felt the
fresh air, I just was able to release
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everything that was bottling up.
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And you know, it's really important to
have some really good friends that you
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trust when you're going through this.
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You guys, I don't know how I
would've made it out of that moment
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without mo I really do not know.
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I'm so, so grateful for them because
they, they definitely saved me that night.
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Like I really needed someone to
physically get me out of there
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because I couldn't do it myself.
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Because I was also fighting this
embarrassment and shame as well.
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I was fighting this embarrassment
of, oh my God, like why is
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this happening to me here?
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And there's a level of anger in
that, but I'm also so embarrassed
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that this is what's happening to
me and that I just can't get the
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choreo because my mind is not there.
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I felt so much shame because my body
that I'm trying to move and be in tuned
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with, I just can't connect to it because
I feel so disconnected to it right now.
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And that's really hard because I spent
the last couple of months intentionally
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focused on finding safety back in
my body and reconnecting to it.
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That's why I started heels dancing, not
only to learn what sexy means to me and
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express my sensuality and embrace it, but
to also be at one with my body and connect
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to it because again, my body has been
violated and I've never given myself the
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permission to learn how to live with it.
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I never gave myself the freedom
to truly let myself feel
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and be at one with my body.
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I kind of just thought of my body as like
a secondary thing, like, oh, it's there.
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I didn't realize how much was stored up
and pent up in it because of the trauma
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that I've experienced towards my body, it
does have an effect on your mental health.
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It does, I don't wanna speak for
anyone but myself when it comes
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to, you know, healing from sexual
violence and dating violence, like
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this is my own personal experience.
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But I do know with the conversations
that I have had with other survivors
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that this feeling of being disconnected
to your body is something that we all
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struggle with on different levels.
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And I'm even reading a book right
now, it's called The Courage to
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Heal by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis.
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And there's a section in here about
learning to live in your body actually.
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And you know that we, we need to
allow ourselves to release what has
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happened to our bodies against our will.
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You know, it's great to talk about and
share our experiences, but we also need
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to do the same when it comes to our body.
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And there's this intense connection,
this intense relationship between
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our body, our mind, and our spirit.
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At times, I still feel
trapped and caught in my body.
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At times I still feel like an
alien in it because so much
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of my body has been violated.
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No, not even, not, not even so much.
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Ha.
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Like it, my body was violated against my
will point blank and period, and all the
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emotions that come to it that I've put
upon myself, I, I do not deserve that.
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No one deserves that.
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But we put it upon ourselves
as it's it's our fault.
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It's our doing that this happened to our
home, that it happened to our bodies.
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It's not our, we're doing, it's theirs.
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It's their actions.
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They are responsible for their actions.
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And what we can do
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is we can try our damn to survive.
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Because if we survived the abuse,
if we survived the assault, if we
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survived X, Y, and Z happening to
us, we can survive the recovery.
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When I think about getting back into my
body, especially after something as that
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intense flashback that I experienced this
week while I'm recording this episode.
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I have to go back to my go-to list
of things that I do to feel safe
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in my body and reconnect to it.
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So I want to share these actionable steps
that I have been doing when I experienced
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moments like the ones I experienced
at my heels class that help really
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ground me and bring me back to my home.
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And I know some of them may sound
a little, you know, a little zany,
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a little wacky, a little out of
there, a little unconventional.
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But I promise you they work.
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I promise you they work.
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And I hope that this helps you as well.
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So number one, radiant icons,
is a body care routine.
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That touch of you putting moisture on
your body, that touch of putting soap on,
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that touch of spritzing perfume on those
pulse points in your body, it creates
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a level of safety within it because
you're getting used to right that good
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touch, that good touch of you touching
your body in a safe way in a safe place.
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So for me personally, a body care routine
has been something that has really,
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really been a game changer for me.
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Even when it comes to the simple
things of those touches that
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we just spoke about, right?
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It's allowing me to get comfortable
with certain touches on my body of
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like, oh, well actually that feels
really nice putting this lotion
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on my arm, or it feels really nice
putting this lotion on my legs.
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Right.
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Right now I am really, really
loving my Bath and Body Works
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Sweetheart Cherry body lotion.
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It smells so good.
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It's like literally so delectible you
guys, and also it just, it just feels
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so nice on my skin and it, it just,
like, it makes me feel so much better
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and just connected to my body in a
different sense that I don't think we,
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I don't think we really, really think
about, to be honest, when we're on this
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journey of reconnecting to our body
and feeling back in line with it, you
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know, and feeling safe in it again.
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So I challenge you radiant icons
to perfect your body care routine.
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Think about the products that you
are using on your body in the shower.
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What are you using for soap?
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What are you using for your shaving cream?
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What are you using as your body
wash if you're a body wash icon?
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Also radiant icons when
it comes to body care.
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I think of perfume not only putting
it on those pulse points to feel extra
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luxurious and like put together and like,
ooh, la la, I also think of those pulse
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points as reminders of when I get anxious
to sniff my wrist as weird or wacky
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or unconventional as that sounds like
smelling my Oakcha sinful, layered with
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that girl viral vanilla just grounds me.
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It puts me back in my being and my body.
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It's just a constant reminder on my
body of the scent that I chose to put on
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myself to align myself back into my body.
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I also have a discount code for Oakcha
that I will link in the show notes
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for you guys, but those are just some
things I encourage you to think of.
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The second one is fueling your body with
nutrients and cutting out the food noise.
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This step has been a game changer to
me when it comes to reconnecting with
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my body because in order to reconnect
with your body, you need to fuel it
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and nourishing your body with foods
that make you feel good like the extra
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crunchy cheese doodles in the blue bag
from wise or sushi rolls, or a little
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snack plate, or a really good salad.
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Or a really good burger, like a
smash burger with onion rings.
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Oh, or some s'mores cookies.
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That's what we need.
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That's what I'm talking about when
it comes to fueling your body.
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And a fun thing when it comes to this
step, radiant icons, is I challenge
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myself with finding new recipes that
I want to try, whether it's on the
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cooking side or the baking side.
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I love to bake cookies
with my dad and my sister.
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We made s'mores cookies like a couple
weeks ago, and that was like the
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highlight of my life because I've been
wanting to make them so bad or even,
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um, what did we do the other day?
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We made like these, like
kitchen sink cookies.
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Like, I, I love a good cookie.
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Okay.
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Like, it's so good.
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Like, oh my goodness, like I love
a good sweet treat like that.
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Or on the other end of it, when it
comes to cooking, see, I don't cook,
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but I do like try new things for lunch.
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That's when I have fun with it.
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So my hyper fixation meal right
now is my handmade sushi rolls,
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but they're not like sushi rolls.
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They're like.
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How do I like, maybe it's like a hand
roll 'cause it's like seaweed chips
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from Costco and then you can use
like canned tuna or canned salmon or
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like smoked salmon or imitation crab.
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And then you put spicy mayo
on it, like sriracha mayo.
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And you just eat it and
it's like really good.
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Like I love that.
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Like I had that the other day, my dinner
literally was my hand rolls, but I did it
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with imitation crab and avocado with my
seaweed chips and my spicy little mayo.
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And then I had a Poppi and I had my
extra crunchy cheese doodles that
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are really, really hard to find.
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And I made it my mission to find it so I
can treat myself to a little Amanda night.
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It was so, so great you guys.
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But that's what I'm talking about when
it comes to fueling your body with
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nutrients and cutting out the food noise.
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Number three radiant
icons is group movement.
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There is something so special and powerful
about a group movement class because it
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allows you to cultivate community and get
back in your body and turn your brain off.
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I love me a good group workout
class because it truly allows
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me to turn my brain off, right?
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Just like I mentioned in heels dance.
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I can turn my brain off, but also
be surrounded in community and just
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focus on what I'm trying to learn.
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I just gotta focus on what someone is
telling me to do and actually do it.
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That is the best feeling in the world
that allows me to get back in my body.
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'cause I'm solely focusing on
the movements that I am doing.
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For instance, just this week right
before my little Amanda dinner
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that I just told you guys about,
I went to my first boxing class.
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So I'm a boxer now, radiant
icons and it felt so damn good.
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It felt so damn good to be strong and
to be powerful and to punch that damn
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bag and get all my anger out and get all
my embarrassment out and all my shame.
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Even the coaches, literally
I was punching the thing.
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I was like, boom, boom, boom.
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And you guys, you know that
a left-handed boxer is called
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a SouthPaw, like very unique.
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That's me.
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But anyway, that's not the point.
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The coaches literally the bag
was like swinging everywhere.
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Like my poor friend Mo.
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Mo went with me to this class and
you know, they were on the other
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side of me and I was just punching
that damn bag so hard and it was
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just kept swinging everywhere
and it almost like swang to them.
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I felt so bad.
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So then the coaches like, there
were multiple like helping
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out and everything, and.
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You know, they had to keep coming and
holding the back so I could punch it.
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'cause I was punching so damn
hard because I was so angry.
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I was so angry that my body has
been violated against my will
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that I said, you know what?
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Fuck it.
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Punch it.
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It's great.
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Um, but anyway, not the point.
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The coaches would come around and be
like, damn, girl, like, you're strong.
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Like, I'd be scared of you.
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And so I was like, well, you can just
imagine what I'm punching and radiant
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icons We can all imagine what was going
on in my brain and what I imagined
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the target of my punching bag was.
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Okay.
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Okay.
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But no, genuinely, like the coach is
saying that I'm like really strong and
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that they, they literally said that I am
strong and that they would be scared of
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me as, as they should, as they should.
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As they should, so should my
abusers, but you know, not the point.
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The point of this point or this step
radiant icons is that doing something
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in a, a group fitness class allows
you to get back in your body and find
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safety in it because it allows you
to turn off your brain, get your body
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moving, and be surrounded by others.
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Because you're never alone
on this healing journey.
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You may not be on the same
healing journey as me, right?
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But we all are healing from
something in this life.
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We all are.
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We are never alone.
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Even if it does feel like we are
alone on our own individual paths
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of healing, we never truly are.
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So why not surround yourself in a
community that just wants to get active,
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turn their brains off and just go for it?
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Right?
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I think that's what's so magical
about group fitness classes is that
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you can be surrounded by others.
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You never know what anyone
else is going through, but
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we're all here for one purpose.
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00:26:39
We're all here for one goal is to complete
this damn class and get our bodies moving.
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00:26:44
That is so beautiful and that is
so powerful when you are on this
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journey of learning how to live in
your body and reconnect with it.
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00:26:50
It's literally a physical
representation that you're never alone.
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00:26:53
You are never alone.
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00:26:55
I was never alone when I
was in that boxing class.
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I was never alone When I
was in that heels class.
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00:26:58
I always had someone.
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00:27:00
I always had someone, even if they didn't
know what I was going through, right?
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00:27:04
I always had someone in my corner.
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00:27:06
Everyone is always cheering you on.
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:
00:27:08
I want the best for you
on this healing journey.
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:
00:27:10
radiant icon.
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:
00:27:12
As you were learning how to live in your
body and reconnect to it and reclaim
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00:27:16
safety in it, I want the best for you.
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:
00:27:19
I do.
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:
00:27:20
And so this step I really, truly
do love, try group fitness class.
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00:27:25
Let me know.
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00:27:26
Let me know how you like
it and what class you did.
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00:27:30
Let's get to step four.
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00:27:31
Step four is affirmation
Work in the mirror.
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Now, my therapist gave me
a specific recommendation.
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I can't find it right now, but I'll
link it in the show notes for you guys.
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:
00:27:41
But this may seem odd at first.
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:
00:27:44
Okay?
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:
00:27:44
But affirmation work is so vital
because it retrains your brain
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:
00:27:49
and reframes your thoughts.
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:
00:27:51
Whatever we feed our mind,
radiant icons becomes our reality.
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:
00:27:57
So we need to train our mind to see
things in a positive light, especially
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00:28:03
how you view yourself and your
body as you are coming home to it.
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:
00:28:10
And my last one, radiant icons.
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:
00:28:13
I know this is gonna sound so
unconventional, but it's so movie
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:
00:28:18
magic and I just, you just need to
do it radiant icons dancing in your
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:
00:28:24
room like no one else is watching.
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:
00:28:27
It's almost like if you have a car
and you know how to drive and you
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:
00:28:31
just like jam out in your car while
you're like cruising on the highway.
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:
00:28:36
It's the same type of concept.
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:
00:28:38
It's that same type of
feeling of being free, right?
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:
00:28:43
There is just something so healing about
jamming out in your car or jamming out
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:
00:28:48
in your room and dancing like no one is
watching or singing your heart out, like
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:
00:28:54
no one is watching and no one can hear.
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:
00:28:57
There is something so freeing
about it that allows you to
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:
00:29:01
just be one in your body.
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:
00:29:04
It all comes down to
Freedom radiant icons.
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:
00:29:07
So I encourage you to implement these
action steps, especially when you are
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:
00:29:14
looking for tips and tricks on how
to help ground yourself and come back
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:
00:29:19
to your home, which is your body.
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:
00:29:22
Alright, radiant icons.
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:
00:29:23
That is your tea time session for today.
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:
00:29:25
If you enjoy today's episode, make
sure to subscribe, to leave a rating,
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:
00:29:29
a review to tell your friends about
us, to tell everyone and anyone
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:
00:29:32
because we love more radiant icons
in our iconic community of ours.
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:
00:29:37
I do have to say radiant icons.
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:
00:29:40
I am loving all the love you have sent
regarding our Own Your Sexy Collection.
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:
00:29:46
You guys.
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:
00:29:48
I love this collection so damn much.
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:
00:29:50
I'm literally wearing the hot and healing
little baby tee and the matching shorts.
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:
00:29:54
I know you can't see the shorts right
now, but um, literally it's all I
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:
00:29:58
live in is this collection and I
love seeing you guys match with me.
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:
00:30:03
So please make sure to
send me your pictures.
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:
00:30:07
And if you haven't already picked up
your favorite pieces from the collection,
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:
00:30:11
then Radiant Icon, what are you doing?
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:
00:30:15
Make sure to click the link in
the show notes below so we can
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:
00:30:18
match and own our sexy together.
453
:
00:30:21
Okay?
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:
00:30:21
Okay.
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:
00:30:23
But anyway, radiant icons on a more
serious note, I do wanna say thank
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:
00:30:30
you for listening to this episode.
457
:
00:30:33
Thank you for listening to this
episode with care most importantly, I
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:
00:30:37
know this episode was a heavy hitter.
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:
00:30:40
I know I spoke about a
lot of subjects that.
460
:
00:30:45
You know, aren't easy to talk about.
461
:
00:30:48
They're not easy for me to talk about.
462
:
00:30:49
And I know on the other end
it may not be easy to hear.
463
:
00:30:53
Right.
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:
00:30:54
But my goal with Dare to be iconic,
especially with this season, season
465
:
00:30:59
three, has been to have the hard
conversations that no one talks about.
466
:
00:31:06
The conversations that I wish
I had, the ones that I wish
467
:
00:31:09
I still do have to this day.
468
:
00:31:13
That is why I use my voice and share
my story, even when it's really
469
:
00:31:19
hard, even when I'm really scared.
470
:
00:31:25
I have the conversations because I know
that there is another radiant icon on the
471
:
00:31:29
other end who is listening to this tea
time sesh right now that feels less alone
472
:
00:31:35
because of the conversation that we had.
473
:
00:31:38
Because somewhere along the way in
the conversation even if they didn't
474
:
00:31:43
relate to the specific experiences that
I shared, they felt seen and heard.
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:
00:31:50
And I do wanna say that if you have
experienced what I have experienced,
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:
00:31:57
whether that's sexual violence or sexual
assault, or PTSD or intimate partner
477
:
00:32:04
violence, also known as dating violence,
I want you to know that you are not alone.
478
:
00:32:11
I know this journey, at least
for me, has felt so isolating
479
:
00:32:17
and has felt so isolating for
the last nine years of my life.
480
:
00:32:21
Even while I'm recording this very
podcast, I'm like, oh, I don't know if
481
:
00:32:23
anyone will resonate to what I am saying.
482
:
00:32:27
There's that doubt in me, right?
483
:
00:32:29
Because I'm scared.
484
:
00:32:31
I am scared
485
:
00:32:35
to talk about this 'cause it's
hard and it's uncomfortable.
486
:
00:32:42
But
487
:
00:32:44
the more I talk about it, the
more I am able to heal for me.
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:
00:32:49
For me, that is my choice.
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:
00:32:52
The more I heal out loud in my way, which
is talking about it on this podcast and
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:
00:32:57
having these types of conversations,
it makes me feel less alone.
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:
00:33:03
It truly really does.
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:
00:33:05
And so I want you to know that if you've
experienced anything that I've mentioned
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:
00:33:09
in today's episode, you are not alone.
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:
00:33:12
You are not alone on this journey,
and I believe you and I support you,
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:
00:33:16
and I will be linking resources in
the show notes below for you guys.
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:
00:33:20
Okay?
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:
00:33:21
I love you guys so much.
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:
00:33:22
Thank you for letting me share my story
and use my voice, and I hope it helps you
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:
00:33:26
feel less alone on your healing journey.
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:
00:33:29
I love you guys and I'll
chat with you next week.
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:
00:33:32
Remember, radiant icons.
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:
00:33:33
Dare to be iconic.
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:
00:33:35
Bye.
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:
00:33:37
Welcome to the Fashionably Single
Podcast, where single life meets
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:
00:33:40
real talk, hosted by Hannah.
506
:
00:33:42
This guy is sitting next to me and
this was like a no shoe kind of house,
507
:
00:33:45
so he had to take his shoes off.
508
:
00:33:47
They were playing cards, drinking, and
then all of a sudden he starts rubbing his
509
:
00:33:51
foot on my leg and her co-host Jessica.
510
:
00:33:54
So he leaves me at the table, he gets
his food, he goes back to his car.
511
:
00:33:57
I'm thinking he's
dipping out on this date.
512
:
00:33:59
I just told him I don't want to marry
him and I won't let him kill me.
513
:
00:34:03
So two millennials in
Austin, Texas, navigating.
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:
00:34:06
Independence and becoming your best
self with confidence and style.