Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Spirit of EQ podcast! I'm your host, Eric Pennington, and in today's episode, we're diving into a personal and transformative experience I recently had hiking near Mount Rainier in Washington State.

Despite my fear of heights, I pushed through a challenging 6-mile trek, rising from 7,000 to 8,000 feet in elevation. Along the way, I encountered a myriad of emotions and found valuable lessons in vulnerability, the importance of naming emotions, and the power of taking life one step at a time.

Join me as I share my journey, the strategies that helped me overcome my fears, and the insights gained from this unforgettable adventure.

Life Lessons from the Hike

Eric wraps up the episode by summarizing the life lessons he gathered from this hike:

1. Life as a Hike: He emphasizes that life is a series of moments or "chapters," and recognizing each moment as part of a larger story can help us navigate difficulties. This perspective prevents us from being overwhelmed by challenges, as they are just a part of the larger narrative of our lives.
2. Authenticity and Ego: Eric discusses the importance of showing up as your true self. When ego becomes too dominant, we risk becoming inauthentic. Vulnerability can indeed be risky, but if people abandon you for being vulnerable, it says more about them than it does about you.
3. Emotional Intelligence: Naming and understanding emotions can transform them from an internal enemy to an ally. Eric credits EQ (Emotional Intelligence) skills for helping him manage his fear during the hike. These skills are essential tools that can be learned and honed over time.
4. Success One Step at a Time: True success doesn’t come from skipping to the end goal but from the journey itself. Each step holds its own value and lessons. This approach applies not just to hiking but to all aspects of life, including career, relationships, and personal growth.

In each episode, Jeff and Eric will talk about what emotional intelligence, or understanding your emotions, can do for you in your daily and work life. For more information, contact Eric or Jeff at info@spiritofeq.com, or go to their website, Spirit of EQ.

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Spirit of EQ

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Mentioned in this episode:

SEQ Development Report

The SEQ Development Report is an innovative tool that combines emotional intelligence with one's spiritual life, distinct from religious contexts. The report helps individuals understand their connections with themselves, others, and their surroundings. It aims to identify areas in their lives that may need improvement and highlight their strengths, ultimately facilitating better navigation through life. To obtain the report, individuals need to contact Spirit of EQ via email at info@spiritofeq.com and complete an online assessment that takes about 15 to 20 minutes. After the assessment, a debrief session is required to review the comprehensive information provided in the report. Spirit of EQ also offers further coaching to support individuals in their personal development journey.

Hi everyone. This is Eric. Welcome to the podcast. Today I'm going to be talking to you about the story of a mountain and maybe some lessons that come along with that, at least that came to me because I actually was on a mountain. So let me let me explain. Few weeks back from, this recording, I had an opportunity to visit the great northwest in the United States, Washington State specifically. And a part of that trip, which was mostly vacation, which was mostly leisure, I had the opportunity to take a hike at Mount Rainier, one of the trails near Mount Rainier. Don't want you to feel like I was, like, climbing the summit of Mount Rainier, and you'll understand more in a moment.

So this particular hike started at about 7,000 feet in elevation, and the hike was about 6 miles. And we were going to go from 7,000 feet to 8,000 feet. I should let you know very clearly that I am not a fan of heights. Some might even say, oh, that's a fancy way, Eric, of saying you're afraid of heights. Well, okay. So cut me some slack. As we arrived at the, park, or I guess it would be base, of the trail, I looked up, and I could start to feel, okay, we're talking about some serious elevation here for someone like me. Maybe like you, you'd feel the same way.

I don't know. However, as those emotions started to come, because you know the drill, there's a thought, the emotion follows, and we make a decision. I was tempted to tell those I was with that, oh, I'll just hang out down here and wait for you guys. You go have fun. I'll just find something to do, while you're scaling. However, I didn't because it was family and people I'm close to, and I thought I can I can do this, and I can fight through whatever I need to? But there also was a part of me that felt like I don't wanna let them know that I'm experiencing fear. I think that's where ego kicked in. And, I kept silent for a bit, and we put on the hiking boots, got our waters and all the necessary things, and began the trek.

And, certainly, as you could imagine, the higher we went, the more intense my thoughts and emotions were. The primary decision I made was to continue. There was a lot of dialogue in my head though. I went from naming the emotions I was feeling like I'm afraid, and naming what I'm speaking of there is in my head. I wasn't verbal and audio to to those around me. So naming him, which helped a bit. I also had a lot of dialogue with God and, a lot of dialogue with myself, and it helped. Another thing that really helped too was distraction, and the distraction was focusing on other things than the fact that I was moving up in elevation.

I'm not throwing this out to you to say this is the answer if you're going on a hike and you are nervous or scared of heights, whatever the case may be. I'm just saying what worked for me. And my distraction was is that I would begin a conversation with a family member and allow them to talk to me. It it took me into their story, if you will, and I found that very helpful. I also found it very helpful to focus on one step at a time. And some of that was out of necessity because, certainly, I didn't wanna be in a position of where I'm thinking, oh, I don't need to focus. Now in hindsight, I probably, on the next go round, I think going forward, I probably wouldn't need to do that, but in the moment in that time, I did. So at about the halfway point in this particular trail, there's a looks like an area for rest.

It's just more flat. You're in a valley, if you will. There's places you can sit. I think it was purposely done this way just out of my head. But one thing I noticed as we did rest is I looked up to my right and I could see where the elevation was heading for the next in this in the last half of this particular hike, and it was daunting. I don't think I've ever been that high up at least where I was walking, And it was very clear that that's where you were gonna go. There was only one way to go or you could head back. And once again, even though I was tempted, I'd made a decision to keep moving forward.

And I also still employed those same techniques that I mentioned earlier as far as dialoguing with God, naming my emotions, dialogue with myself, remembering one step at a time, finding ways to distract my thinking, going into someone else's story, asking powerful questions, open ended questions, and we began the second half. And it was really, really tough. Not from a terrain and grip and, you know, it was just mentally tough. But you know what? I got to what was considered to be the summit point. I didn't mention earlier how breathtaking the scenery was, If I had a way of sharing my screen or while I'm recording this audio, I I would, but if you've ever seen Mount Rainier or quite frankly, probably if you've seen any real mountains of that nature, you understand what I'm talking about. So as we got there, I wasn't like, oh, no problem. I did it. Wonderful.

No problem. Let's just go turn around and go back. No big deal. Because it was still a big deal, And I still needed to employ those same concepts or maybe strategies is the better word to say around helping me be healthy as I was on this hike. And it wasn't shortly later that we had headed back, and as we were going back, it did get a little bit more efficient. I don't know if I wanna say easier because I still needed to use those tools. But one of the things that was significant for me is my son-in-law was with us, and he was doing this as if it was just a regular walk on flat ground. And he I mean and he is someone that skis and he does climbing, that kind of thing.

And I thought for a moment, maybe I should just let him know. Why don't I be vulnerable? And let him know that this was a big deal for me. And I could feel my ego creep in. Don't don't say that. Don't don't let him know. You know? You don't want him to think that you're and then I said, hold on. Again, this self dialogue. My vulnerability could be something that would lead to him understanding that strength lies in vulnerability.

And that I don't need to have everything together in every situation. I don't need to be whole. I can be somewhat wounded. I I there's not anything wrong with that. And I went ahead and I told him. I said, you need to understand something. I don't know if I've ever told you, but I'm I'm afraid of heights. And this was this was a big deal to me, but I'm glad we did it.

It's beautiful. And he didn't, like, give me, oh, you're so strong and wonderful blah blah blah because it's a seed planted. And maybe I won't even see any of the results of what that seed plant looks like, but it was important for me in so many ways. So let me tell you a little bit about what I think are some of the lessons I learned from this 5 mile trek and hike. The first one is is that life life, there's this big picture. Life is kind of like a hike. I've used the terms it's kind of like a book, a story, the story of you, the story of me. And in this particular chapter, if I can stay with that theme, there was this hike.

And there'll be other chapters. There'll be the chapter of the birth of children. There'll be a chapter on the career move that you made. There'll be a chapter on relationships that went south, that were separated, maybe never to be repaired. Health, physical, mental. And the importance of this for me is the understanding that it's a part of the story. It's not the entire story. Because like on this hike, if I were to look at this as the totality of everything, I might have withdrawn.

It might have been too much and it might have been overcome by it. But remembering that it's a part can help us to navigate more efficiently in a more healthy way. So keeping that in mind when we hit those moments when we're really afraid, maybe it's a good idea to remember that this is not the entire story. This is just one part. You may like it. You may not like it. It may hurt. It may feel good, but it's a part.

And hopefully, it's a part that goes to making a wonderful life, a vibrant life. I think if we don't remember that there's this big picture called our life, We might allow temporary interruptions, disappointments to derail us at such a level that we've risked not recovering. Another thing that, really stood out for me, a second point is that you are who you are, where you are at, wherever you show up. I mentioned to you my ego, and I think one of the problems with our ego, and it doesn't mean that ego is bad unto itself. It's a part of us as human beings. But when it becomes too dominant and has too much say in things, is that easily we can fall into the trap of trying to be someone other than who we are, which leads to, really, at the end of the day, being a fake because we're trying to appear to the world that we're something that we're not. And don't get me wrong. I I understand.

Vulnerability is a risk proposition. You may have some people that will reject you and abandon you for your vulnerability. But something to think about. People who abandon or reject you for your vulnerability, what does that say about them and the role they play in your life? Something to think about. So this is a call to get to know you better, to get to understand who you are better. And I think the more that we know, the stronger we get, the more confident we become, and we're able to show up in the world in an authentic way. That's really, really important, and there are many, many pathways to do that. And if you've listened to any of our episodes, you know, we've touched on these kind of things, so I won't exhaust it here.

But getting to know who you are, And in my case, it's getting to know Eric better, getting to understand Eric better, not from judgment, but from curiosity, with empathy, and compassion. So as you may remember, as I was telling you this story, I was talking a little bit about naming the emotions I was feeling. Well, I want to tell you that the EQ skill, which is a learnable skill, thankfully, really helped me a lot. Because as I was feeling those various emotions, primarily fear, I was able to sit with the fear. I was able to allow the fear to speak. I was having dialogue with the fear and it helped. It's easy to read studies and books about how emotions named lessens their intensity and like it's a strategy thing. And it is, no doubt.

But it also it it makes total sense from a human perspective. Our emotions were not given to us to harm us. They're actually our ally because they contain valuable datasets for us to pull from. I'm not sure I'd be able to be as vulnerable as I was on that hike if I didn't have this learnable skill and the, sort of, the competencies that come with it. So I can't recommend enough that it accompanies your learning about who you are, and it's a active set of tools that you can draw upon when you encounter these various situations. And just as a reference, as a side for that hike story, I really didn't think it was gonna be that, high of an elevation. I remember thinking, oh, it can't be that bad. It's not gonna be that.

Oh my goodness. So as it is in life, when we encounter the things that don't look like we thought they were gonna look, we need these tools to be able to navigate in a healthy way. And maybe even in a triumphant way. I mean, there's some people who do do that hike all the time. But for me, I felt a sense of accomplishment. Not so much that I could physically do it, because I I was physically able, but that you know what? I could I could be healthy mentally as I was going through something that was a little daunting for me. So again, the power of EQ. Last thing, success happens one step at a time.

I'm stealing a little bit from Bill Ackman who made this statement that progress compounds kinda like money. Well, I think this is the same thing. I didn't need to think about, like, 5, 6 miles back and forth and done it, crown me, and all of the rest Because I think we miss something when we leap over into the conclusion of something we're involved in. We fail to see that at the end of the day, it is those steps where that's where the gold is. And I don't remember exactly how many steps I took on that walk. Excuse me. Walk. Wishful thinking.

On that hike, but I almost feel like at least 50% of them were nuggets of gold for me to understand more about again, a little more about Eric. Again, about those emotions, about the dialogue, about using other stories to help me to cope and to to focus. Those happen in the steps. So how does this relate to when we're not on a hike at such high elevations? It has to do with your business endeavors. It has to do with the building of a relationship or relationships. Maybe we shouldn't expect that it's gonna just happen overnight. Maybe we shouldn't expect that we can just go into chat gpt, ask a question, and then get immediately an answer. Maybe there's something about lingering and just taking one step at a time.

We appreciate you tuning in. We look forward to the next time that we're together. Take care.