Ever wondered what makes someone want to become a therapist? Well, in this episode, we’re diving deep into the wild and wacky journeys that led us both to the therapy world! From the ups and downs of our own mental health adventures to the quirky tales of our training days, we’ll share how our personal experiences shaped our desire to help others. Spoiler alert: we’re not just sitting around analyzing everything—there’s a lot of laughter and realness in these sessions! So grab your favorite snack, kick back, and join us as we explore what it’s really like to be a therapist, from the serious stuff to the hilarious mishaps that make this job so unique.

Takeaways:

• Therapy journeys are often winding and filled with unexpected twists that shape us.
• Navigating the world of mental health requires an open heart and a sprinkle of humor.
• The importance of self-awareness in therapy cannot be overstated; it’s truly the secret sauce!
• Therapists are real people too, juggling life while guiding others through their own challenges.
• Clients often surprise us with their blunt honesty, leading to some hilariously awkward moments.
• Building connections through shared experiences can make therapy feel more relatable and enjoyable.

Foreign.

We're going to talk about how we became therapists.

Okay.

So what made you want to be a therapist?

I mean, therapy really helped me.

I feel like it changed my life.

So I was like, yeah, it was like, that's it.

I wanted it.

I wanted to do something that helps people.

I was really into, like, nutrition.

And then I think just getting into therapy myself, like, saw this more connection.

Yeah.

I feel like I was such a baby when I chose to do this, but I didn't.

Because I didn't.

I never had gone to therapy before.

I mean, I was, like, 19, you know, because it was my undergrad, so I was like, what I want to do.

And then I changed from pre med to this.

It's funny because I'm like, I never went to therapy.

I didn't know much about the field.

I just knew I really wanted people.

I began it.

It had a flexible schedule for babies, like, all these things.

And the field was fascinating to me.

I love people's stories and stuff.

But, yeah, like, once I got into it, I was like, what is this job?

It's great.

I love it.

Yeah.

But if you never actually did therapy before, I mean, you're required to do it when you go to grad school and stuff.

I think they.

Did they make you do it in your program?

No.

Oh, no.

They made us do, like.

I think I could get more hours if I.

If I did it, but I was.

Already in therapy, and I was just like, I'm already.

No, you're good.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They, like, required you to, like, make sure you.

I mean, you should.

You should.

You should be a client before you're.

I totally agree.

And I think I kind of had it backwards because I had started my training and then I had done therapy, and I wish I had, like, done therapy.

Yeah.

In my undergrad because I had ADHD and anxiety, and I was like, that would have really helped me.

Yeah.

Because no, I'm like, oh, I needed it.

I don't think I would survive without.

My therapist in school.

I don't know.

I.

Like, I was terrible.

My undergrad was miserable in that sense.

I was just like, how'd you survive?

And I didn't.

Dude, like, he had the best undergrad, and I hated it.

Yeah.

And then I went to grad school.

I was like, oh, great.

But, yeah, probably because I.

Oh, yeah.

Therapy and figured out, like, how to cope with some things.

So, yeah, it's kind of.

Yeah.

An intense job sometimes, but a lot.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

But it's funny, I just thought about that, when you're saying like, I had my Andre, I was like, you did it the opposite way.

That's so funny.

Yeah.

Turned out okay.

But it was very opposite.

Yeah.

I mean, I went.

That's why I'm like, yeah, I tried so many different things.

I went to hair school.

I didn't know that one.

Yeah, I went to hair school.

I dropped out.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Worked at a store.

Did you not like the hair stuff then?

Oh, I want.

No, I wanted to be a hairstylist since I was like in fourth grade.

And then I touched people's hair and I was like, no, I'm not letting somebody leave with a bad haircut.

Like, oh, so like anxiety, like you couldn't like mess up their hair.

I could not mess up their hair.

And I was like, I'd rather just talk to them about like their life or something.

Yeah.

Because that's all in their control.

Like, I don't feel like I had a friend who would be like, I just feel like I have so much power and I felt like the opposite when talking to people.

I'm like, this is your life.

I'm just here to listen.

And it's so nice.

But yeah, some people swap it in their heads and like, no.

Yeah, I had know.

You did hair school.

Yeah, Yeah.

I always thought I would be an esthetician if I wasn't.

I like it so cuz I love skincare.

I think it's so fun and like cosmetology.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So did that for a bit and then I was like, no, yeah, nutrition.

And then it was like, this just still isn't it.

Yeah.

I feel like nutri because I had a nutrition minor, but I don't think it was like, I like calling to be nutritionist.

Yeah.

Like, yeah, well.

And I think even just like that there's like so much that in the mind that plays a role from even a nutrition standpoint that, you know, that's therapy.

That was segue to therapy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I feel like that's so true.

Yeah.

Interesting.

Our journeys are so weird how we get places, but we're here.

We did it.

Okay, so if people are like in a room with you, what can they expect from you for a session?

I think I'm pretty sure we're like.

The complete opposite because I come on.

Like, you're like pretty calm and relaxed and like consistent.

But I mean, I think like as a client at least even me being a client in my own therapy, I think it's important that I've learned that there's like, you know, a sense of humor, going through, like, rough things and that, you know, I'm not here to tell you, like, what to do.

I'm here to help, like, guide you with, like, what you already know.

So I don't want to say, like, I'm hands off, but I definitely, like, you know, meet you where you're at.

Yeah.

Figure, like, the calm to the ones.

Let me come in.

And it's like, what I.

Like a puppy dog or.

Yeah.

Like, my clients like him.

You're right.

Best friend.

But we've had multiple clients that comment who know both of us will be like, Taylor Styles is very different from Kayla's.

And it.

It's good.

You're more.

You're way more like, direct and blunt.

Oh, yeah.

And I'm less.

Sometimes I am, but I'm less.

You'll do it when it's needed, but it's not, like, your regular.

Yeah.

I'm more like you.

Like, the client knows internally, like, what they need or what they want.

And I'm not here to, like.

Yeah, sometimes.

And I'm more of, like, a.

I think it's.

It goes off your specialties, though, too, though, because, like, I started in addictions.

Yeah.

And you.

You kind of have to be more of a challenging person.

Oh, yeah.

Right.

And then, like, getting some of the clients I've gotten over the years, I feel like it just kind of formed that, like.

That's very true.

You know, like, I will tell you when you're totally effed up.

Yeah.

I will tell you when, like, you got this, you know, like.

But it's very black and white.

Because other clients where I think it's doing the spectrum people, too.

You just can't, like, be around the bush.

You've had to just be like, yeah, you know, this is how it is.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I'm thinking even what you said the, like.

Because I like, you know, modalities that I use is like.

Like polyvagal.

Yeah.

So, like, you know, I'm thinking even, like, the things that I say are from, like, a nervous system standpoint.

Like, you know, where are they?

Where am I?

And, like, how to help them.

So sometimes even just, like, a blunt delivery is not helpful for.

They might want it.

Yeah.

But, like, it's not helpful for their, like, state of nervous system, where they're at.

Like, it might push them.

So I'm, like, pretty aware of, like, that, too.

Yeah.

Like, where their nerves.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's so fascinating because your clients, you can be a little more Substance than mine.

I'm like, your nervous system is totally off.

Yeah.

So we're having to teach you how to reread your instincts again.

So we kind of have to push you towards that.

Challenge it more.

But I think it's fascinating because it's.

You can just see based off personality, kind of like what you're drawn to or how you present it.

But yeah, I've always loved that in training too.

It was always like, all my professors would always joke, you're just.

You're really good at making friendships of people.

Like.

Yeah.

And they're like, don't.

Don't lose that.

But it was rare.

Yeah.

So I always know, like, my style will be the unicorn style.

And it's fine.

But it's.

It's a good time.

People have a good time.

But it definitely wave.

So you like polyvagal theory.

What other techniques do you use regularly?

I feel like I don't.

I guess I'm like, obviously, I think there's a level of, like, where you always are using this sense of attachment, like, but it's not necessarily always used in session, but it's kind of always there in my brain, at least.

I don't think people, like, realize there's a difference, though, because they hear all these theories or techniques and it's like, I don't know.

As a clinician, at least for me, I always have, like, the problem solving side versus, like, the presenting of interventions side.

So, like, what actually you see me do in the room is different from, like, how I'm calculating.

Yeah.

The problem, you know?

Yes.

And that's where I think people don't realize there's a difference.

Like, attachment theory always ruins how I see.

Yeah.

What's happened in their lives.

And they're like.

But I'm not gonna use and talk about attachment with them to talk about something else.

Yeah.

You're gonna be like, well, how's that relationship?

How do you know?

Like, you're gonna talk them a lot more like normal terms.

Right.

Some people don't think you're actually doing therapy sometimes.

At least I've had people like, be like, like.

Right.

Because I think you're talking even like when you're talking about communication styles, that goes into attachment, too.

But we're not talking directly about.

I'm not going to list you out the theories from a textbook, but I think people are sometimes expecting that.

But then they won't understand it if you deliver it that way.

Which is why people, I think.

Do you get this too?

Like, they're like, you make therapy so deliverable, so easy.

Like, I'm making progress.

But why?

And it's like, because it's in your words, Right.

We're just making it fit you and what's happening in your life.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm not gonna sit there and be like, that's a systemic problem.

That's right.

Yeah.

No.

Yeah.

I feel like that's, like, kind of always there, but I don't feel like I talk about that with my clients often unless, like, they bring it up or it actually becomes, like, a more, you know, focus.

But that's maybe just always in my head.

Yeah.

I always tease my clients.

It's like a serial killer code.

Do you remember detective shows where there's, like, lines going, everywhere connects.

Yeah.

The clues.

Yeah.

And I got adhd, so, like, my brain is always connecting the things in, like, I can picture it in my head that way.

Be like this and this.

Go together here.

Yeah.

And feel like, really, like.

Well, that's how we're trying to solve the problems.

Yeah.

Where it's coming from.

But, like, I'm not going to sit there and tell you my, like, map for you.

Right.

Yeah.

No, because there's so.

And that's what's, like.

There's so many different aspects of a person's life that.

Yeah.

You know, contribute to, like, one, maybe.

One thing, but that's what people understand.

They think it's very cut and dry or very basic, and it's like.

No, it's very, very complex.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

I have to ask this question.

How frustrated do you get when people come up to me like, I could do your job.

I've never had that happen.

You've never had it happen ever?

No.

Knock on wood.

Okay.

How would you react if people said that to you?

I'd probably say, okay, go do it then.

I love you.

Good luck.

Are you really, like.

Have you ever had anybody be like, are you psychoanalyzing me right now?

Or, like, no, I feel uncomfortable around you because you're gonna, like, read into everything.

No, I think I've had a friend be, like, I asked them, like, how they were, and they, like, didn't want to reply because they're like, you're not working.

And I was, what?

I'm not, like, psycho.

Yeah.

I'm not your therapist right now.

I'm just asking you how you are.

So that was, like, kind of funny, but.

Yeah.

Nobody's actually, like, said, yeah, that.

Yeah.

All the time.

Yeah.

Or like, your job would be just so easy.

Like, I could do your job.

And it's like, there's a lot that goes behind what we do that we don't, like, present.

It's like, that's funny because I feel.

Like a lot of people would say, oh, my gosh, I can't do your job.

Like, what you do is really hard.

Yeah, I feel like I've gotten that.

And I'm like, yeah, actually, you know, there are some days that are harder than others, but, like, you know, but I have.

I've gotten.

Yeah.

The opposite.

That's so funny.

Yeah, I've gotten that.

Like, your job just seems like I could do, like.

Okay.

Thanks, pal.

Wow.

Yeah.

Wild.

Or they analyze.

Like, okay.

I mean, let's kind of just like, everybody analyzes everything.

Well, that's what, like, everybody.

You don't need to be a therapist to analyze.

Right.

And at the same time, I tell.

I just tell people, like, you don't pay me enough to do it.

So unless you're paying me right now, I'm not going to analyze you for free.

Yeah.

And like, I don't know what to.

Do at that point.

I'm sassy.

But I've gotten it so much where I'm like, oh, my God, just going to offer three, like, free therapy for you.

And maybe I want to be like a human, like, once in a while.

Or I would probably say.

I would probably do it and say everything and they would be like, pissed.

Did you ever see a Friends episode?

Did you ever watch Friends?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's where Phoebe was dating a therapist and he was, like, being quiet and he analyzes the whole friend group, like, nails it.

Yeah.

If somebody, like, said that to me.

I'd probably just do that.

And then they would be like, ew.

Like, you got it.

All right?

And I'd be like, yeah, do you want to hear what I have to say or not?

Yeah.

Like, maybe we should.

That's funny.

I love that.

I can't believe you never had that happen yet.

Not yet.

I don't doubt that it might happen.

But yeah, it's true.

I try really hard to just keep it quiet that I'm therapist.

Oh, yeah.

When I.

I went on a plane and what do you say?

There was this guy who could not, Would not stop.

He was like.

He was an older guy and he just, like, I think was just really lonely, but he just kept talking.

Like, first it was like a.

I think it was a three and a half, three hour flight.

No.

And then I was just like, do I say that I'm a therapist or Do I not?

Cuz I'm going to get two reactions.

And I'm unsure which one I want.

Yeah.

What do you think I did tell him?

And then he like asked a million questions which was just like.

I was like, okay, whatever.

Like, but it was just really funny that I'm like, oh my gosh.

Yeah.

Half the time I just go and be like, I'm in the health field.

Yeah.

But then that's.

It'll spill the beans and be like, my wife is therapist.

And I was like, oh my goodness.

Yeah, yeah.

Because you get kind of like two reactions from saying you're a therapist.

It's either like, like a positive one or a really like negative one.

And you're like, I don't know which.

One I'm ready for.

Have you noticed you get kind of judged for it too?

And like I don't even know how to explain it.

But just like you're kind of a woo woo, like job.

Like it's not a real job or it's like oh my goodness, I honor you so much.

And like both of them.

I don't know what to do.

Like when you're like oh my goodness, you're amazing.

You're like, hey, thanks.

I didn't do it for like I remember when I first got there, I just, I didn't do this to get attention.

I just want to help people.

You don't know like what to do and you're okay, I'm gonna like leave ob.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

So what does a day in the life look like for you as a therapist?

This.

Oh my gosh.

I know.

Isn't that like a weird.

I've had like multiple people ask me that, like yeah.

Or like what is a session look like?

I think cuz like going into it, a lot of people don't know what to expect.

Like it's like this unknown like being a therapist.

You mean like being a therapist but also like as a client.

What can they expect?

So I think like sometimes they just like are curious about my life or my day.

Oh, they're so like, like because they don't know.

Yeah, I mean we know like what.

Being a doctor is kind of.

Or like, you know, like basic general jobs.

But like our job is to people.

Like this, you know, I mean it's like base.

It's like just like anybody else's.

Just like anybody else's when they go to work, like if they're working at home or if they're working in an office, like just do your, you know, basic stuff.

That everybody else does, and then you.

Meet with your client, and then you.

Go home and, you know, you sit on the couch and you watch tv and you do all the same stuff that everybody else.

But I love that you're saying it like that, because I get so many people.

Like, I think, like, we get put on a pedestal sometimes of, like, you must have everything together.

You probably have hobbies.

You should do it.

I'm like, yeah, girl.

I, like, laid on my floor for three hours.

Just be like, I don't want to move as my client, like, climbs over me with, like, mama, mama blocks, you know?

Yeah.

Or in between sessions when you're like, I just didn't do my notes.

No, you're just, like, scrolling your phone.

Or you just, like, kind of flopped out.

Just shoving food in your face.

Yeah.

Really quick.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right.

It's.

That's pretty.

It's pretty normal for us to be.

Or like, half the time I'll be running from one thing to, like, sliding into sessions.

Because you don't have, like.

I mean, as clinicians.

I didn't know this when I first started, which I should have done this.

You should have only had, like, five or six a day.

I think I booked out to, like, eight a day.

Yeah, it was stupid.

I like, three or four now.

Like, with babies, I do three.

Yeah.

Usually.

Some days I'll go up to five, but usually three.

What do you want to take?

Five a day.

Five a day is pretty.

That's a lot.

Like, that's, like, your max, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

So we have days before that, which people don't realize, but it's, like, that's why we.

People don't realize why we charge so much, I think.

Yeah.

It's because it.

That hour takes a lot to go into that hour, and, like, that one client takes a lot of love.

Yeah.

Like, I'm mentally, like, going into, like, your entire life and, like, looking in your perspective and then, like, trying to come back into, like, my, you know, my life in my head and how I'm doing things and then going back into yours.

Like.

Like, there's, like, a lot of mental energy that, like, within the hour, I'm, like, going back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.

That I'm like, yeah.

Trying to do that for eight different people is, like, insane.

But then how many times a week?

Right.

And people don't realize.

It's like giving your heart and soul to somebody and you're used like a vending machine.

That's, like, the Best example I have where it's like you're coming in and just zapping us.

We're not a real person in that hour.

We are you, your ally, trying to think better for you so you can have your life.

Yeah.

So like our whole well being is kind of pushed aside a little bit.

Yeah.

You know, like we try and guard ourselves but that's basically what we're agreeing to is like you are more important than me in this hour.

It's all about you.

And that's what we're doing.

And people don't realize how much time, effort and thought before and after sessions go into.

Like how many times have we met for like multiple hours talking about clients.

Or like, oh, I have like sometimes I dream about like my client's situation.

Like I have no idea that I'm like thinking about them, you know, while I'm making dinner.

Like I hope they're okay.

Like, you know, it's a real relationship.

And even though we like have to charge for it so we stay alive and have money.

Like people don't realize like this is a real relationship.

So.

Yeah, it just is more of like the one kind of like a one.

It's.

That's what's hard.

Is that not.

It is one sided and it isn't one sided because like I, it's not.

I am in the relationship, but there's only part of me that is in it because it's a professional relationship that like it's really weird.

It.

But it is to describe that.

Right.

So I don't.

So I'm like when it, when it is, when people say it's a one, it's a one sided thing, I like kind of.

I'm like, well, not necessarily because I am part of it makes me feel like I'm not part of it if it's one sided.

Like that would be all the client.

Which I don't think is accurate because I am part of it.

But like there's no part where I'm telling you about my life or like where there's a reciprocation where like, you know, I'll.

I'm pretty open if like a client asks me personal information with like discretion.

But like it isn't about me, it isn't about us, it's about you.

Yeah.

You're not here to caretake us, we're here to caretake.

So like.

Yeah, it is a weird, it's a weird dynamic.

How did you explain that?

Yeah, like doing it as a therapist, did you have any like hurdles to go through doing it or, like, being able to.

Because you.

I feel like I walk in and I separate, like, real Taylor versus therapy Taylor.

Right.

Like, yeah, Real Taylor can, like, be this kind of thing.

We go back and forth.

Yeah.

Swapping.

I mean, I think that's with, like, any.

Any job, though.

Like, you do that with any job that, like, there's.

There's the professional part of you and your work, and then there's, like, the other personal part of you and, like, doesn't.

It's not, you know, black and white.

Yeah.

Like, everybody does that.

I love that you convert it.

Everybody does that.

I really love that you can word it that way because I don't think I've ever been able to, like, word it where, like.

Like, so what?

Like, yeah, I do it.

You have to wear different modalities in different places.

Like.

Yeah.

Kind of part of yourself.

Because I'm like, I was a barista at Starbucks for so long, and I'm like, even when I did that, I was still this, like, there's still a professional part of me coming out.

There's not.

You're still Kayla barista.

Yeah.

Like, you know, you're.

You're.

It's normal for your personality to, like, shift when you go into different settings.

I love that.

I think I've only.

I really have.

I mean, I've done other jobs, but they've always been related to this field.

So I've only ever known, like, how it is to be in this field, fulfilling the roles and, like, variances.

Right.

As, like, a professional.

So I've never actually been, like, a barista somewhere.

Yeah.

Like, oh, yeah.

I still did the same thing.

Yeah.

So it's good.

You can, like, word it that way.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But it's.

It's fascinating.

People, like, will ask me, like, what's your day been?

They, you know, they think I've just been in the office all day, and I'll be like, well, my little dude just threw up on me this morning and I was running errands, you know, like.

Yeah.

Like, this whole story.

And they're like, oh, you had, like, a whole day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm a whole person.

Let's talk about, you know, like, it's fascinating.

It's so funny.

I know.

And then they go in your reactions.

I'm like, not your reactions.

I mean, like, what you've been asked is just really kind of funny.

I got a good, what, like, five years on you?

Yeah.

Maybe six.

That makes me so old.

It's so funny.

Yes.

You get like, just a lot of stories over the years.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I think sessions wise, too.

It just.

It just looks like this, like.

Yeah, we were just talking pretty much.

Yeah.

So that helps people if they are wondering about sessions.

It's just this.

Yeah.

Therapy's fun.

Yeah, it can be.

I think if you have the right clinician, like, you can have a really good time.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I love that.

So funny, all the differences for that stuff.

You.

Have you ever had, like, a client awkwardly say something to you?

Like, you remember I had multiple clients.

Like, I was just fat when I was pregnant the second time.

Oh, my gosh.

And they all told me that afterwards.

I thought you gained a bunch of weight.

Oh, my gosh.

That's so awkward and funny.

I get like, all the weird comments and I don't know, I.

I've gotten some zingers over the years.

Like, my husband is always like, what do we get today?

Oh, my God, really?

Yeah.

Like, it's regular.

We'll be like, it's so fun.

And I don't.

I don't know if it's like, maybe you're the.

You're the best friend.

So, like, people are just like, straight up blunt, honest with you.

I think people, like, really don't filter with me at all because I make it sometimes.

I'm like, you can filter, like, just a little bit.

Yeah, no, that one, like, those crushed me a little bit.

I was like, did I really look that bad?

Oh, my gosh.

Wow.

So you don't get that I'm.

I, like, I'm racking my brain when I'm like, that's not funny.

No.

People are pretty.

Pretty together with you.

No, it just must be my personality brings it out.

That's so funny.

Yeah.

Well, and you've had client.

Well, you've had clients probably for longer periods of time.

Oh, yeah.

Which makes them more comfortable seeing, like.

Ones that I have in their, like, fifth grade, fourth grade.

They're not like, graduated or they're like.

Yeah, well, and teens.

Only teens can say teens say something.

Half of them come from adult.

Oh, really funny then because you're like, yeah, yeah.

But you don't, like, quite know how to respond.

That's pretty funny.

Oh, interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

What's your favorite part of your job and least favorite part?

Oh, my gosh.

Favorite part is definitely just the session with my client.

Like, I just would rather be talking with you and like, you know, figuring out whatever you need to figure out.

I hate writing the note.

Yes.

I hate writing the Note about it.

Worst thing about our job.

Oh, my gosh.

It will be the death of me.

I just hate writing.

It's the worst.

Yeah, Mine are the same.

That's pretty much it.

Yeah.

I think that's why we do this job, though.

Like, I.

My husband is a tech recruiter.

How do you sit in front of a computer?

I mean, he talks to people half the time, but like, still just.

I need, like, something engaging.

Otherwise, I just think I'd lose my mind.

Yeah.

Well, I'm like, even.

Just, like, writing notes.

Like, you know, you don't even.

You don't necessarily include, like, all the details of, like, what happened.

So it's so brief and, like.

Yeah.

Just.

They're literally like three sentences, maybe four.

But they are the biggest pain in our job.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You just take time.

Things that just take, like, the extra time where you're like, this isn't doing anything for anybody besides, like, just what I have to do, you know.

For your job.

Yeah.

That's kind of annoying.

What's one thing you want to do in your career?

I know, right?

Big question.

What do you mean?

Like, just a goal that you have or like, something that you hope will happen?

You're doing this job.

I feel like there's a lot of things, but I think.

I mean, we've talked about it, like.

Like, having more.

I love doing groups.

I think eventually, like, I'd love to be a supervisor and.

Yeah.

I think teaching, like, even just teaching some sort of, like, I really love dance and movement and like, you know, nervous system regulation.

So, like, teaching even, like, movement with that, I think would be so cool.

Yeah.

Really good.

We need to set up that class.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I think this job is just like a.

Forever.

Like, you're just forever learning.

It's just you're always in a state of learning.

Yeah.

About yourself.

And so it's just like kind of this feeling where, like, you're never really gonna get there type feeling.

Yeah.

And you should always feel kind of.

Just like, being okay with, like, this forever learning process that, like, there's these, like, you know, maybe some goals that you can get there, but you're never going to, like, it's not like other jobs where, like, oh, you made it to, like, this manager.

Spot.

Manager.

Yeah.

Or like the CEO or something.

Like, you can program this stuff now.

Like.

Yeah, there's like, this competency level people.

Can hit where, like.

Yeah, you, like, you can get that as a therapist, but, like, there's always more.

More and so.

But I think that's, like, what I.

What I loved and what drew me to the field the most was, like, there's always something I can do different.

There's always.

Because I didn't want to get bored or stagnant job.

I don't feel like we ever will.

Because even just the story that we come across every day, I'm like, you know, like, there's been problems.

I'm like, I've done this for seven years now, and I'm so, like, never seen this one.

Figure it out.

Or I have to reach out to Elizabeth and be like, you know, like, yeah, there's been a few times I'm like, I don't this.

And I love that about her job.

Right.

Love that concept, like, Elizabeth training us where, you know, you're never in it.

You always want to feel a little bit like.

And, like, the idea that your therapist, like, knows everything and, like, has all the answers or, like, does, you know, almost as this, like, perfect person where they, like, don't have problems in their life is so not true.

Where it's like, sometimes people come in and, like, we also don't know just as much as you don't know.

Like, we're going to help you figure it out, but, like, we don't have the answers either.

Yeah.

I think the coolest lesson I learned in grad school was they told us, like, be real with who you are.

So, like, being pregnant, it was freaking hard to be pregnant and counsel.

And, like, there's one day where one of my clients just ticked me off, and I was.

I had hormones, like, but, like, raging, oh, my God.

And I just looked at those like, like, I am pregnant.

I'm gonna rip your face off if you don't.

Like, like, I know that's not appropriate.

I am trying to be a therapist.

Yeah.

But I'm a real human right now.

And, like, that was the coolest lesson.

I learned in grad school was like, you were still.

As much as you try to be that person and set aside your own self, you're not gonna have those moments.

And you need to be good at calling.

Yeah.

And, like, you have your own growth.

That was the first time I ever.

Really had to be like, I am.

So angry right now.

I'm trying to pull it in, you know?

Yeah, it was bad, but it was real.

Like.

And, like, he understood.

He's like, oh, you're pregnant.

Sorry.

Yeah.

You know, like.

Yeah.

Because, like, yeah.

Like, what are you gonna do?

I am pregnant.

Like, right?

Yeah.

We're not robots.

Yeah, we do have.

If you want a robot, go to Chad GPT then.

But that's okay.

I saw this thing too on Instagram News.

Somebody posted where they were talking about, like, Chat GPT can't like, mimic the hands that are, like, in the caves of people.

Oh.

And like, you know, like the cave art that they used to do, like.

Yeah.

And I think it's so interesting.

Like, you're right.

We're not Chat GPT.

We're people.

And if you want to actually learn about yourself, you learn it best through people who are also imperfect.

So we come up looking like we're perfect.

We're not serving you or them.

Like, it's just gonna fail in multiple ways.

Yeah.

But it's really hard sometimes.

I know.

I see things like, where Chat GBT can be like your therapist or whatever.

Have you seen any advice, though?

Sometimes I'm like, I was done.

It just feels really generic.

That's.

Yeah, it feels like it doesn't matter what somebody could have put in.

It feels like a very.

And maybe some of it's helpful of like, generic.

And then you.

But it's very like cbt, DBT based versus a person can actually be like, yeah.

Like, it feels like, you know, there's been so many times in a session I'll just be like, I don't know what I'm like picking up from you, but like, you got a vibe going on today.

Like, what is that Emotion.

And Chat GPT can't call that out.

And like, if they aren't self aware enough to report to Chat GPT right.

Then how are they going to get that reflected back?

Right.

Which is the point of having.

Right.

Yeah.

Or even like Cobalt will call out emotion sometimes.

That's so funny.

He's so funny.

Have I told you before?

He'll like, sit in front of me with certain clients that have really bad ptsd.

Really?

He'll guard me for like, no, I did not.

He'll like, I've had it with like, usually my war vets.

And he'll like, side eye them for the first three to four months until he decides they're like, more stable.

Oh, my God.

But he'll like, watch them come in, sit his butt right in front of me and like the whole session, like, he's seen, like, do whatever.

And he like walks around and stuff.

And usually he's like laying there.

No, he will sit in, like, sit crouching, like sitting there.

Hello.

A whole session for like three months.

Wow.

And then he finally is like, okay.

There.

And then he can censor Polyvagal theory, you know, like, this is their symptom.

That's so cool.

Yeah.

But he's been the cool one where I've learned a lot.

Like, your body system regulates.

So, like, I watch him to tell me the instincts because I didn't have them at first.

And he's been with me the whole time.

I've been a therapist, so I'd watch him and then he would tell me, like, okay, this is like their vibe.

And then based off his vibe, I would be like, let me figure it out.

So cool.

So I got a lot of my, like, instincts of, like, this is the vibe you're carrying at my dog.

Oh, my gosh.

It's the coolest thing ever.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

Because I tried to not train that out of him.

So, like, whenever he growls at anybody, I'm like, there's something wrong.

I don't know what it is.

Like, right.

We're just gonna go the other way.

And he's done it like five times in his whole life.

Isn't that cool?

Yeah.

I was like.

But then there's this book.

I need to look it up.

I don't know if you ever read it, but it was talking about, like, how our instincts have been washed out.

Oh.

Like, read it in my grad school.

1.

I don't know book it is.

I don't remember.

But there's a lot of books like this and where we need to, like, listen to our inner voice and our instincts.

And that's where I got the idea for, like, co.

He's gonna be my guide for, like.

Yeah.

Getting that back.

And he totally was.

Oh, yeah.

Coolest thing ever.

Yeah.

Wow.

I know.

That is cool.

Working with a dog has been really cool.

I know.

I'd love to have a dog one day.

One day.

They're the best.

Yeah.

He's gonna.

He's seven.

That's wild.

I know.

Wow.

I know.

It's crazy.

It's like the best big brother ever.

Aw.

He's really cute.

He's obsessed with his sister.

His brother sometimes makes him happy and makes him mad.

Relationship he loves.

My little girl.

Is the best.

I like him.

Yeah.

All right.

Anything else for your therapy, you.

That you want people to know?

I know.

That's like the open ended question.

I can't think of any.

How's it been?

You've been two years now.

Almost.

Almost two years.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

Yeah.

How's it being a therapist for two years?

It's great.

I think, like, Yeah.

I think I'm thinking of the question of just like.

Yeah.

There's just always like this sense of like growth that I just don't get bored with it.

So I think it's just cool to be in a job where I'm.

I'm not getting like bored.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I feel like this is one that can entertain us forever.

Yeah.

Matson's always jealous of my job.

That sounds really funny.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He's like, I don't think I could ever do it.

He wants me on like the program side because that's my dream is like do programs.

Oh yeah.

Like what?

Yeah, but he wants to like be one of the like supporter people, like the counselor people that are like therapists, you know, like helping run the program.

He'd be great at it.

You met Matthew, like personality wise, totally fine.

Oh yeah, yeah.

He would have so much fun.

But he's always just like, I'm so down.

Wow.

So it always makes me like grateful I did it.

Yeah.

What would be the like the main program or like group that I want to do?

I love nature stuff.

Like that's always been like my safe place and my happiness.

So I think I want to do a nature one.

Like I'm looking at the water right now.

Like, oh, I would want to do something like that, like camp or something like that.

And there's in Hawaii, my parents have a house in Waimea and that's where I want to take the programs too because they have a lot less resources on the island.

Yeah.

But then now that we're a part of the community and like.

Yeah.

Have the people we can get in easier than like, oh my gosh.

So cool.

So my dream is to start it here, get the wellness and I want like we have the yoga one paired and then if we do the dance one and like keep getting these wellness centers paired here.

And my goal is to take it over there eventually and help those island kids who have less resources.

Yeah.

And be able to do that.

But we'd have to do non profit.

Yeah.

But I think it'd be so cool if we could do nature therapy for them and yeah.

Like be able to connect to their, you know, self awareness of themselves through just doing stuff outside.

I know.

Like my social skills group is a group where they can do.

I think today we're like bake cookies for social skills.

Right.

But like they're doing day to day things that they normally do with their friends.

Yeah.

It's just kind of connecting more to even just like the activity too.

And like.

Yeah.

Just being more present.

Yeah.

Instead of.

And like being able to navigate it socially, like, and that's the kind of programs I love doing.

It's like normal, typical stuff we do day to day.

Yeah.

That's just like, how do you navigate it mentally and like, how aware are you?

Like, I was listening to this book on the way over here, and it's like mindfulness is all about, like just self awareness, basically.

Like, are you tracking what's going through your head and 99 of people aren't.

Oh, yeah.

And that's like, we taught teams that so much better.

So one day we're gonna do that and that'd be awesome.

That would be cool.

Yeah.

You can.

We can run it together.

Yeah, that'd be great.

Yeah.

And then I want to do something with animal shelters because.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

I have been getting on this idea and we need to figure out how to start it.

Like, Koa has some products that we've, like, made, and I want to make them and then donate to the shelters in Hawaii because they don't like shirts.

And stickers and stuff.

You know, like things that are.

Because Koa, like, his command is give loves.

Oh, yeah.

For his therapy command.

So give loves line where people can buy the items, but then some of the proceeds go back to, like supporting.

Animals that are homeless.

Cuz I just.

I know.

It's like, so cute.

He's such a loving dog that I'm like, he deserves to have a legacy after.

Yeah.

That's kind of my goal is to build his legacy.

Like, that's what Umay was built around his baby.

So Baby Toa.

I know.

I'm like, he's old.

He's fine.

He's not going to die.

Never.

No.

Oh, my God.

Don't.

I don't want to think about that.

I know.

Yeah.

So we got a lot of dreams.

That'll be good.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Cool.

Yeah.

One day we'll get you a dog.

Yeah.

One day.

One day.

All right, my friend.

Thanks for letting me interview you for intro to you and.

Yeah, just chat.

Cool.

Let's go.

Okay.

We can end it.

We could.