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Treat Your Emotions Like Guests | S1E059
Self-Compassion with A Call For LOVE Episode 5926th March 2024 • A Call For LOVE • Linda Orsini
00:00:00 00:27:22

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In Rumi's poem, "The Guest House," we find an exquisite metaphor for the human experience. It's an invitation to embrace every moment, every emotion, every experience that comes knocking on the door as a guest.

Linda beautifully captures the essence of this invitation, intertwining it with the profound teachings of the Four Noble Truths from Buddha.

Through her words, you're encouraged to welcome all that life brings – the joy, the sorrow, the challenges, and the triumphs – with open arms. In doing so, you'll discover a path to inner peace and understanding.

Linda's focus on mindfulness, self-compassion, and embracing life's lessons guides us toward a deeper connection with ourselves and the world around us.

As you tune in, embark on a journey to explore the transformative power of self-awareness and empathy, guided by the wisdom of Rumi and the profound teachings of the ages.

Be inspired by the intricacies of the human experience, guided by timeless wisdom that transcends time and space.

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About Linda:

Have you ever battled overwhelming anxiety, fear, self-limiting beliefs, soul fatigue or stress? It can leave you feeling so lonely and helpless. We’ve all been taught how to be courageous when we face physical threats but when it comes to matters of the heart and soul we are often left to learn, "the hard way."

As a school teacher for over 30+ years, struggling with these very issues, my doctor suggested anti-anxiety medication but that didn't resonate with me so I sought the healing arts. I expanding my teaching skills and became a yoga, meditation, mindfulness, reiki and sound healer to step into my power and own my impact. 

A Call for Love will teach you how to find the courage to hold space for your fears and tears. To learn how to love and respect yourself and others more deeply.  

My mission is to guide you on your journey. I believe we can help transform the world around us by choosing love. If you don’t love yourself, how can you love anyone else? Join a call for love. 

Website - Global Wellness Education

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Transcripts

Linda Orsini:

Welcome, everybody. Welcome to a call for love. My name is Linda Orisni, and I'm so grateful you have joined in today. You know as a certified meditation teacher, transformative life coach, yoga sound, shamanic and energy guide, and healer, author and speaker. My purpose and passion is to inspire you on this journey called life, to turn your wounds into wisdom, and live with emotional freedom to awaken your highest self, enabling you to discover your personal power, purpose and passion. To help you do this. Today, I am sharing with you a timeless and soulful poem called The guesthouse. The Guest House is written by Rumi and this is an invitation to dance through life through mindset, and curiosity, and even acceptance, I can imagine there are many out there who have not heard of Rumi. But just to let you know, Rumi was born in the 13th century, in what is now called Afghanistan, and he was a poet and mystic writer. His words continue to touch the hearts and souls of people all over the world. And that may be you. I know it is me. Even today, you cannot scroll through the social media. without hearing or seeing the influence of Rumi's thoughts and words. I go through it. And I see quote after quote about Rumi or his inspirations and it really touches my heart. He has such a beautiful essence in his writing and really capturing the human experience. So Rumi's poetry is both beautiful and very deep. Well, today, I want to share with you the guest house. And if you have not heard this poem, it is very powerful and beautiful and insightful. I first heard this poem many, many years ago. And to tell you the truth, it didn't really land. I heard it. And it was very nice. And then I just kind of let it go. But it wasn't until I took mindfulness, self compassion. And it was shared with us again, that I really reread it and listened to his words, it was like he was speaking directly to me. In fact, he's actually not just speaking to me, but he's really speaking about the whole human condition, this thing we call life, and his poetry really transcends time and space. Rumi not only reflects all our thoughts and feelings and experiences so eloquently, but he has this infinite and Divine Sense about him, that really elevates our soul and takes us on the journey. And I think this is why I actually resonate so deeply with him at this time, because it's the essence, he really talks about love the meaning the core meaning of who we are, this collective consciousness coming together, and really being grounded in the deep source of your truth, which is that we are energy, that we are love, and that we are whole. And his poetry really reflects that. Now the guest house, there is a thread of interconnectedness in this poem. And so when we dive into it, we'll actually get a glimpse into his meaning. He goes quite deep, and he does not spare words that are very powerful in terms of sorrow, and grief. And as I read this poem to you, you may have heard it before, but I really invite you to use in mindfulness, what we call the beginner's mind. So imagine that you have not heard this poem before. And maybe you haven't, but really allow yourself to greet it with new eyes. And as I read this, I just want you to enjoy it. But after I'm going to create some parallels between the guest house and the four noble truths from Buddha. As I said, Rumi was born in the 13th century. And Buddha was actually born around 600 BCE, in what is today known as Nepal. And who knows if Rumi was familiar with Buddha's work, however, they shared many commonalities, and that is, they were both very mindful. Their teachings were very compassionate. They talked about impermanence, and essentially the interconnectedness of all beings. So as you settle in and I share the guest house, allow it to just vibrate through you through your thoughts through your mind and see where it lands in your body. The guest house. This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival, a joy, a depression, a meanness. Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. welcome and entertain them all. Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight, the dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes. Because each has been sent as a guide from beyond Romi It is so beautiful and really worth listening to more than once. As they said this poem has so much essence in it. And it has and shares some similarities with the four noble truths from Buddha. Now, if you are not familiar with these noble truths, let me share them here with you, and really connect them to this really beautiful and powerful poem, The guesthouse. Let's take a look at the first noble truth. And that is there is suffering. And you know, the Buddha doesn't say that life is suffering, people always think, Oh, the Buddha says life is suffering but know, what he means is that life contain suffering. And where there is life, there is going to be suffering is part of the human condition. It's part of the human experience. And therefore unavoidable physical sufferings, which you are more than familiar with. They are birth, old age, sickness, and death. For instance, my family has had the joys of many births, there's been a lot of babies come around and expected. And of course, where there's life, there has to be the circle of life. And that is, of course, there's some aging, sickness and illness, and then of course, death. And that's what it is. It's like the circle of life. These guests come in the circle of life comes in birth, aging, sickness, and death. But then there's the emotional sufferings, all those feelings that we feel inside. And I talk about these all in my course emotional freedom. We can feel depression, we can feel grief, we can feel shameful. We can feel separate, alone, isolated, sad, unhappy, all those lower vibrations. And then of course, there can be times where people are pushing our buttons, or we lose people due to distance or just being the seasons of a friendship. And all these emotions that are so big, really reflect the guest house because their guests, we don't always possibly want the guests that come into our lives, but they do come into our lives for a purpose. I do believe this, I do believe that. We are meant to learn from each experience. And with that, we really have to hold space for that, know that we're going to have the good and we're going to have the bad because life is impermanent. There is one thing that's constant, and that is change. As the story of King Solomon says this too shall pass. Because happiness comes and goes. Happiness is real and comes in many ways, but happiness does not always last it can't. It's the circle of life is that ying and yang. And Buddhists believe that the weight and suffering is to first accept the fact that suffering is a part of life. It's it's not bad. You can say I'm having a really bad day. And when you say bad, what does bad mean? While I'm feeling really low, I'm feeling really nervous. I'm feeling really ashamed and name those feelings, right. We want to give names to our feelings.

Linda Orsini:

And then be careful when you say I am feeling because then we are taking on that emotion. So instead of saying I am feeling, say, today is not a great day, you know, label it to the day, as opposed to I completely identifying it as a person as a soul. That's what I like to do. Today is not a great day. You know what, tomorrow's another day. And if you know the 92nd rule, it suggests that emotions typically only lasts for around 90 seconds before they run their natural course. And so know that, when we're getting triggered, we can allow 90 seconds to move through us before reacting, that's the gift of meditation and mindfulness to give us the space to let our body process it until we can work from a state of consciousness. Because when we are working from our unconscious mind, habitual reactions can come out of us that can harm us or others. And so we really want to take a little bit of space, you know, knowing things are impermanent, knowing things will change is fine. If we can just stay with it, just hold space for it. Like guests, you know, there's good guests, not so great guests, but they're all guests. And let's try not to judge, let's just be present, and know that it's part of the human experience. Mindfulness, self compassion says common humanity, it's a common experience to feel all these range of motions. And I say in meditation, you can think of them as clouds in the sky, or according to the guest house, you can think of them as guests coming in and out. Now, the second noble truth is that there is a cause of suffering, the cause of suffering is that ying yang, that pull, push the cravings, and then the desires, and then the ignorance, and then the resistance. So let's take those slowly, one at a time. Our cravings and desires are things that we wish for that we draw to us. And then when we draw them so much to us, they can create suffering. For instance, have you ever had a massage that was so decadent, I know that I've had I had one a couple of weeks ago, and I was lying on the table, and just the music and, and the just the relaxation, the whole essence of this massage was so beautiful. And in my mind, I was thinking, I don't want this to end. Oh, much. I wonder how much time has passed, oh, I wish this could go on forever. And then I had to stop myself. And notice it, that mental ruminations in my mind and say, Whoa, I am craving I am desiring. And you know, I'm not being present, right. And that's what we want. We want to know when we're really clinging to pleasant emotions and feelings and experiences, because they are going to end that's, that's the great thing about this too shall pass is that nothing lasts forever. And the bad thing is, there's nothing that lasts forever. And of course, we know the truth always holds both poles. And so we want to notice that and then release that release, like grep. Now, when we are resistant, and we push away experiences, that also creates suffering, as we It makes perfect sense there. What you want to do is say, Oh, I'm resisting this, this is a terrible experience. I wish time would would go faster. But it's not going to Can you just be with it? Can you just hold space for that and know that this too shall pass? I have to say that if we are practicing mindfulness, we want to notice our life experiences as best as we can, without judging. And if we can just be with it, without judging, then we can invite a greater inner peace. I always like to say, isn't this interesting? Isn't this interesting? Isn't this interesting? It's so great. Isn't this interesting? It's so terrible. Isn't this interesting? And then I can create that space to observe my experience without really latching on to it or pushing it away. Now the third noble truth is to remove those desires and those ignorances and I don't mean ignorance is to be very rude, but ignorance is really just not knowing Do we want to release not knowing. And that's where meditation and mindfulness are so important because it helps us create that awareness. I would like to give you an example. And this is a story, I have to bring up my mom. And this is a story about my mom, where she was not being open, she was just not allowing the vision to see what could be held in this time in this story. And so my dad had said to her, her name was Josephine just feed. My cousin's coming down for three days, and we have to have him visit. So he's going to be staying with us. And my mom started to panic. She says, I have a house full of children. I think she had six or seven children by then she says, I can't handle I can handle guests. You know, I got this, I got that. And the kids are running around and, and there's just to chaos. I don't want it. Your cousin. I don't want your cousin to come even though I like your cousin. I just can't handle it at this time. And my dad says, well, there's nowhere for them to go. I said they could and they're coming. Well, until my my father's cousins came, I wasn't even born then. So this is a story told to my mum, she resisted. She was lamenting about it. She was worrying. She was pushing it away. And she was not being very present. And then of course, the day came when the cousins came to visit, just like guests in a guest house. And after three days, she had such a great time, she was crying. She didn't want them to leave. And she chuckled, and said, you know, if I couldn't just let go what I thought I was thinking and just be peaceful and present with the experiences they arose. I wouldn't have caused myself suffering. She didn't use this as exact words. I'm just paraphrasing. But I wanted to have had that whole experience leading up you know, those days of not sleeping those days of anxiety and stress. And she said that was a real big eye opener, to remove that suffering through greater awareness. And that's what the guesthouse is all about. Rumi's poem really talks to this because when we hold space for these experiences, and all our emotions, we can allow our personal growth to transform, it's really a matter of cultivating and allowing ourselves, really to move through our experiences with more self compassion. And that's what a call for love is, if you're a call for love listeners, knowing that I talk about this all the time, self compassion is paramount in our life, and in helping us navigate through it. I have even created a playlist of self compassion episodes that I will leave in the show notes, all the episodes that speak more directly about self compassion, if you are on the self compassion journey. And of course, I hold workshops. And most of my teachings always encapsulate the real beautiful essence of self compassion. And so with that, and the 90 seconds, and all this awareness, and knowing this, too shall pass, you can navigate through the last noble truth, which is liberation through the middle path, through the Noble Eightfold Path. So Buddhism has this eightfold steps that he shared to help us move through all these experiences. Now, Rumi has said it in the poem, very simply and concisely that guests will come and go, can we not hold space for them, and possibly even, you know, think of them as guides and laugh at them at the door, you know, not take our life so seriously, which is something that I always work on the gift of laughter to lighten those heavy emotions and vibrations. Now, the Noble Eightfold Path has eight steps. And I don't think here is the time to go through them all, but I will just share them briefly. And they are the right view of understanding, really understanding, cause and effect, and then the right of intention or attitudes, such a big one, right. What is our intention? Here is our intention to hold on to anger and resentment. What is our attitude?

Linda Orsini:

Can we be with it without victimhood or blame? Those are really big topics. But those are the steps that will guide you towards liberation and through rate of speech, how we're going to relay our emotions and our feelings to others. And by avoiding gossiping, harsh speech So I really think judgment, like really holding back on that judgmental tone, and then right action, how we're going to respond to people, you know how we're going to live, we want to not steal, we want to live, as we would want to be treated, and we treat others, you know, it's the golden rule. And then right livelihood, you know, avoiding occupations or trades that cause harm to ourselves or others. And then the sixth is right effort, earnestly doing our best, best we can in each moment, that's all we can ask of ourselves. And mindfulness, always being aware and taking the time to really be attentive. And of course, the last one is right concentration, to make our mind steady. And this is the thing. If we don't cultivate some space, more than 90 seconds, sometimes that mindfulness, what we're going to do is react all the time, from our unconscious, habitual habits. And we don't want that, we want to find a steady mind, a sense of inner calm, in order to have the space to respond in a higher vibration in the good for all, not just for ourselves, but for others. And so this is the poem, the guest house, connecting it to the Four Noble Truths, which I feel is such a beautiful blend. And maybe you want to ask yourself, can you create space for what life is bringing your way in this moment? Just in this moment? Let's not make it so big just in this moment. Can you be with what is with really holding it as sacred? Because if it's bad, if it's good, and you don't even want to label those, but if they're welcome guests or unwelcome guests, can you just create space for what is coming to you? And I know it may seem really challenging. Welcome all these experiences with open arms. So maybe that is too much, but can we just be with it, you know, talk to a friend. Seek support. practice, meditation, practice, movement, practice, shifting your mindset, all those tools that I always talk about on a call for love. If you can practice those to help you navigate through these times, it will make it so much easier to weather the storm. And clear the space for new insight, new growth, new transformation. As the poem says, welcome and entertain them all. Even if there are a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house, empty of its furniture, still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight. Yes, life might be clearing out the old to create some new, better opportunities, better mindset. And possibly be grateful for whoever comes. Because each has been sent as a guide from beyond the words of Rumi. If you can invite these in great, if you can't still be kind to yourself, know that as long as you're aware of you're doing the best that you can, that's all you can ask of yourself. And this is the purpose of a call for love. It's really to be present, to help us raise our collective consciousness, to be a source of love and light, not just for ourselves, but for all beings, and even the planet. If we can embrace our experiences, our encounters as a guide from beyond, offering us lessons and opportunities for deeper understanding, then we are moving in the right direction. And that's something to be really proud of right? Knowing that you are living consciously and doing the best you can in each moment with self compassion and empathy for others. There's nothing more that we can ask of ourselves. And so wishing you so much peace, joy and love flowing from my heart to yours. Namaste. Thank you for listening. It would mean so much to me if you could share this episode with someone you feel could benefit from its message and subscribe to a call for love podcast. To receive new weekly episodes every Tuesday. Head over to global wellness education.com To learn more

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